Wednesday thru Monday 22-27 November 2006
Diet Macros
It was within limits, though still not enough protein, until a cheat meal with drinks on Saturday. Then it all went downhill from there - Sunday was an utter junk fest.
Training
Morning cardio but no weights.
Supplements - every day
Multivit (1 cap)
B6 (1 caps)
Glucosamine (2 caps)
Glucorell (2 caps)
Sesapure (2 caps)
Apple cider vinegar w/ manuka honey (2 tsps)
MACA powder (1/2 tsp)
Energy/Mood: I am extremely busy at work lately, lots of travel and well, basically doing two jobs until my boss agrees to hire a replacement for my accounting assistant who left 2 months ago.
Is he paying you for 2 jobs?
So much for empowering your managers to actually manage their function, shit, don't get me started. My laptop at home is failing and can only work for about 10 mins at a time so I have to update my log here at work, but again, being so busy restricts my internet time. You may ask why my job doesn't provide me with a laptop, seeing as I am a Finance Manager and use spreadsheets, part of the senior management team, who ALL have one by the way, work long hours etc. but my boss doesn't want to spend the extra $500 on "just an accountant".
Go into work and tell him the laptop crashed and all his "financials" were on it ans since you only have 1 salary for 2 jobs you can't buy a new laptop right now and then mention that you hope he has receipts and invoices for everything.....
OK, rant in full flow. I have been on 12 interviews over the past 3 months, got offered the ones I didn't want, passed over for those I did. Told I was too "strong", "strategic", "too experienced", "not experienced enough", advised that one particular role had to be more "gender specific". WTF? The vagina loses out again.
See what happens when you can't write your name in the snow........discriminating dirty rat bastards!
So, Saturday I go girly shopping with my friends, try on some party dresses, had to go UP 2 sizes because I am basically in denial that I am 165 pounds and a size 16, those halogen lights in the dressing rooms are brutal. Realising that I've crossed the threshold into plus-size shopping (been a big gain since the US trip if I'm honest), I eat for England, drink 2 bottles of wine and have fallen into a junk fest ever since, using work, life, clothes, everything as an excuse for a lack of self esteem.
^^ being honest with yourself....that's a toughie but you did it. Sometimes we linger "under the wagon" to be sheltered from the rain.
Didn't help that this morning I overslept, got a call from my bank that my account is closed due to maxing out my overdraft only to find that I've been a victim of an internet fraud, and in an attempt to get back on the wagon, buy (on credit) fresh veggies, salads and organic flavoured olive oil/balsalmic/parmesan mix of which the bottle shattered going all over me, my car, the office (I trailed it in the bag, like the true bimbo I am), my new leather handbag (can't by clothes so buy leather).And my boss has just walked in and asked me why I smell so funny.
Well did P lick it off? Nevermind I don't wanna know.
Yes, the sun will rise tomorrow, the world is mostly a beautiful, special place, my family and friends are safe and healthy, I have a job and a man that loves me, so why am I bitching? Because for some truly fucked in the head reason, I ALWAYS sweat the small stuff.
Tomorrow is another day.
I think you will be just as beautiful and just as inspiring tomorrow as you are today.