Well, I don't think Human Resources will allow me to keep pets on a lunch box, especially in a Community Fridge. And I'm sure if I ask, I'll have to see a Counselor.
Maybe I'll get a lunch box and print off a picture of the Ugliest Fat Chick I can find and turn it upside down so I don't see it. So when they open it and see it, all loss of appetite. Close eyes, open lunch box/pale/whathaveyou, take food, close box, open eyes.
Just Maybe.