No libido for you , one year.

[kag729]

I know this has been written about before but I want to bring it up again. I am troubled because my wife and I no longer have sex. We do not have kids. We are both 27. We may have sex once a month or sometimes not at all that month. Time is not an issue either. We are both in good shape and excercise regularly and eat healthy except for the carb up on the weekend. We have discussed it many times and I always get the ;'it's just me I don't feel like it.' We have seen the doc, got counseling. She is not on birth control. I am very caring and very romantic and always give her massages and cook her nice meals and tell her how beautiful she is. When we do have sex, it feels like a chore. <vent> What the hell is the deal? If I hear that damned 'talk it out' thing one more time I am going to kill someone. From what I hear from most of you is that you have sex regularly, or at least once every 2 weeks so you have no idea what I go through. Hell, I stated taking Avant's ONE just to curb my sex drive so it wouldn't bother me so much. This post may seem harsh or callous, but I at my wits end here. </vent>

 

[Machiavellian Muscle]

Unfortunately as a man you are in some good years. 27 years and married is tough especially if she isn't giving you any sex. Some women just don't need sex. Plain and simple. I don't think we could ever understand.

The bigger question is what you going to do about? You could ignore it and hope things get better and live a life of masterbation. You could try to work on it as it sounds you have. You could cheat on her or you could walk away. It all depends on what is important to you. Just hope it works out, because nothing is worse than this happening for the next 5 years and you missed out on five great years. I was with a girl like this and I too was like let me lower my sex drive. Fuck that. Either you are not compatable sexually and something is up with her. I suggest you try to make it work. Give yourself x number of months if nothing is better make a decision.

 

[TEXgrl]

tell her to get a physical and bloodwork to make sure there's not some other reason why her drive is so low.

 

[Temple]

I agree with Texgirl...has she had her hormones checked?? Also, does she care that she has no sex drive??

 

[kag729]

I never thought about giving up, I am just profoundly frustrated. Does she care? I guess, at least she says ' I am sorry that I am not in the mood it's just me.'. It just seems so matter-of-fact to her. She also has this idea in her head that lack of sex drive is normal at her age. However, all my female friends seem pretty active. As guys understand (an some women) sex is not all-encompassing, but it is a major player. I am not greedy nor unreasonable with my desires and am trying to be accomodating. As far as bloodwork goes, everything seems to be fine.
what about supplements? Anyone have any luck with over the counter items. I know they have a female viagara in the works, but I am not willing to risk her health for that until it is thoroughly tested. What about sex suppresents for me? I am using Avant's ONE right now. Thanks.

TEXgrl...email me some of that libido so I can pass it on.

 

[TEXgrl]

hee hee, i did have a slump in my drive in my late twenties it seems, but there were some other factors in my life, i wasn't very active as far as working out, i'd had a kid, i was having some marital problems, so my lack of interest or libido was a combination of things. since you said you both work out, have no child, the two obvious places i would look would be #1 harmones, does she have any female problems at all? #2, i'd wonder if there was something wrong with my marriage, is she happy, getting all she needs from you, and you from her.

 

[kag729]

No female problems.
As far as I know she is happy with me. She like to spend time with me and cuddle a lot. Everything but the big 'S' is just fine.

 

[Machiavellian Muscle]

What about sex suppresents for me? I am using Avant's ONE right now.
.

This is not the solution.

 

[WIDELAT]

MAYBE SHE IS GETTING IT SOMEWHERE ELSE I KNOW THATS THE WORST THING TO SAY OR THINK ABOUT BUT YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT ALL THE OPTIONS

 

[Bikini Mod]

I do know there are some people that just have naturally lower sex drives then others, but not even ONCE A MONTH?

I would be climbing the walls.. LOL I AM!

Seriously, You seem to have covered all of the bases, her health, hormones are in check, there is no job stress I take it, you have no children, she claims to be happy w/you...

I just don't buy it that there ISN'T SOMETHING REALLY WRONG.

I hate to say it, but if it was the other way around I would seriously think that my partner was being unfaithful.

Maybe I am out of line, but the way you are describing it, that is just NOT normal.

Good Luck.