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GoldenDelicious
New member
alrightie then fellas, im bored. boooored. even more bored than a girl going on a date with JerseyArt, but far less horrified of course 
but still. bored bored bored. so, im going to tap out my weekend for those of you who either give a toss, or are at home drinking tequila reading EF with buddy christ as we speak coughcrakcough
*by the way, i laughed my ass off typing this out, so i dont care what you mofos think
so, anyway, there i was, right, on friday night, and seriously bors, i looked HOT really hot!! seriously, i was looking so damn hot there should ahve been a big http://img117.echo.cx/img117/3463/images3zp.jpg next to me ...but anyway, enough about me - lets get on with the story (about me )
so anyway bors, i decided to go to this really aussie sort of bar and have a bit of a prowl for some hot chicks, but the place was full of wilder-mammoths
as usual. seriously, the chick situation around here is bullshit. theres even been a study about my city, showing what happens to a womans looks when she gets here and finds herself outnumbered by men by 5:1. you can see a quick graph of it here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4930/13ptpiws00100sk.gif the local bars are under a bit of pressure from animal rights groups to warn people of the girls in the clubs - the frontrunning sign to be placed on every bar door is just here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4421/images336sb.jpg
i mean really, you *KNOW* that somethings wrong when you walk into a pickup joint and see a sign like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5800/1sln14599qm.jpg
so anyway, i thought, well, there arent any hotties to be found, so i went to the bar and asked for a drink. notice the size of the cup im using - theyve been specially developed here in my city for all the men trying to drink themselves into oblivion because they cant get laid: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/6321/i2038kw.jpg
so i got comfy with my drink for a bit, and looked around. of course, all i could see was http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2129/sid19srgb4nf.jpg
but being the positive dude i am, i treated it like a trip to the zoo and looked around for a bit - the funniest thing i saw was when some dumb tourist guy tried pinching the ass of one of the three toed eagle clawed wilder hags at the bar, the outcome of which can be seen here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8181/13ptpiws85084wj.gif and i have to say...i laughed does that make me a bad person?
oh and before i forget, theres some good news! the new section where djufo and p0ink are welcome to hang out has just opened! guys, when you see this sign, youll know youre in the right place http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5369/i2004ty.jpg
so, many beers later and a couple of visits to the http://img117.echo.cx/img117/1362/si40si40r9kb.jpg
D) things took a turn for the better...much better a hot little thing that i had met earlier came by was grabbed by one of the tendrils of looking goodness that waft from my sculpted body, brushed up against me, and it was ON bors!!! just so you guys can build a mental pic, this girl was niiiiiiice....maybe 5'6, athletic but girly, really cute face and long black hair...woweeeee!! so, i was chatting away with her Greek Nightclub Style...which means i talk with my hands, but i dont wave at empty air ...when, as usual, something happened...her ex boyfriend turned up and started being an abusive little bastard to her...which as you bors know, offends my sensibilities...
so i flexed my boobies (all refreshed from last week ) and said to him... http://img117.echo.cx/img117/434/pvcsafetycaution8kz.jpg with my angry face on....and his two mates came over (i swear no one fights their own battles anymore, ever) and we had a discussion, the moral of the story was that unless everyone stayed cool, that the outcome would go like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/6707/13ptpiws81103fq.gif
so anyway, 5 minutes later, some guys came along to clean up the mess these guys had made on the floor, which looked a bit like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4876/i0260yb.jpg and things quietened down again, though unbeknownst to me, the guys were overheard discussing jumping me later on, the mofos fortunately, i didnt find out about it, and they proved to be massive softcocks (again) so it didnt get ugly...except for the ex boyfriend (mofo) who looked a tad like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/7003/13ptpiws92093sk.gif
so 4am rolled around, and after lots of smooching, just because im a nice guy, i offered the girl a lift home, and she leaned in and said a little something in my ear that made my torso look like this from the front http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2793/i1971uy.jpg ....but like this from the side http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8049/i2129ct.jpg
now you guys might think that im some sort of man ho, but really bors, im not, and i decided to save it (and her) for another night when we were both fresh. so we get in the car and i start driving her home, when the little tarts hands started wandering in places they probably shouldnt have, and my driving looked a little like this http://img117.echo.cx/img117/3581/i1847kw.jpg so i said to her http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8062/i0666gz.jpg you little shit i cant drive like this, tomorrow is a better day for this sort of thing! and she said "no way, theres http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8909/i2098sh.jpg this, were going to go http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2204/trafficsignssouboryregulatorya.jpg with this!!" lol the little octopus handed varmint (i still said no, but we'll date later this week i think )
so whats the moral of the story bors? that karma is a bit like this http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5678/i2165hw.jpg
but still. bored bored bored. so, im going to tap out my weekend for those of you who either give a toss, or are at home drinking tequila reading EF with buddy christ as we speak coughcrakcough *by the way, i laughed my ass off typing this out, so i dont care what you mofos think
so, anyway, there i was, right, on friday night, and seriously bors, i looked HOT
really hot!! seriously, i was looking so damn hot there should ahve been a big http://img117.echo.cx/img117/3463/images3zp.jpg next to me ...but anyway, enough about me - lets get on with the story (about me )so anyway bors, i decided to go to this really aussie sort of bar and have a bit of a prowl for some hot chicks, but the place was full of wilder-mammoths
as usual. seriously, the chick situation around here is bullshit. theres even been a study about my city, showing what happens to a womans looks when she gets here and finds herself outnumbered by men by 5:1. you can see a quick graph of it here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4930/13ptpiws00100sk.gif the local bars are under a bit of pressure from animal rights groups to warn people of the girls in the clubs - the frontrunning sign to be placed on every bar door is just here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4421/images336sb.jpgi mean really, you *KNOW* that somethings wrong when you walk into a pickup joint and see a sign like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5800/1sln14599qm.jpg
so anyway, i thought, well, there arent any hotties to be found, so i went to the bar and asked for a drink. notice the size of the cup im using - theyve been specially developed here in my city for all the men trying to drink themselves into oblivion because they cant get laid: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/6321/i2038kw.jpg
so i got comfy with my drink for a bit, and looked around. of course, all i could see was http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2129/sid19srgb4nf.jpg
but being the positive dude i am, i treated it like a trip to the zoo and looked around for a bit - the funniest thing i saw was when some dumb tourist guy tried pinching the ass of one of the three toed eagle clawed wilder hags at the bar, the outcome of which can be seen here: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8181/13ptpiws85084wj.gif and i have to say...i laughed does that make me a bad person?oh and before i forget, theres some good news! the new section where djufo and p0ink are welcome to hang out has just opened! guys, when you see this sign, youll know youre in the right place
http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5369/i2004ty.jpgso, many beers later and a couple of visits to the http://img117.echo.cx/img117/1362/si40si40r9kb.jpg
D) things took a turn for the better...much better a hot little thing that i had met earlier came by was grabbed by one of the tendrils of looking goodness that waft from my sculpted body, brushed up against me, and it was ON bors!!! just so you guys can build a mental pic, this girl was niiiiiiice....maybe 5'6, athletic but girly, really cute face and long black hair...woweeeee!! so, i was chatting away with her Greek Nightclub Style...which means i talk with my hands, but i dont wave at empty air ...when, as usual, something happened...her ex boyfriend turned up and started being an abusive little bastard to her...which as you bors know, offends my sensibilities... so i flexed my boobies (all refreshed from last week ) and said to him... http://img117.echo.cx/img117/434/pvcsafetycaution8kz.jpg with my angry face on....and his two mates came over (i swear no one fights their own battles anymore, ever) and we had a discussion, the moral of the story was that unless everyone stayed cool, that the outcome would go like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/6707/13ptpiws81103fq.gif so anyway, 5 minutes later, some guys came along to clean up the mess these guys had made on the floor, which looked a bit like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/4876/i0260yb.jpg and things quietened down again, though unbeknownst to me, the guys were overheard discussing jumping me later on, the mofos
fortunately, i didnt find out about it, and they proved to be massive softcocks (again) so it didnt get ugly...except for the ex boyfriend (mofo) who looked a tad like this: http://img117.echo.cx/img117/7003/13ptpiws92093sk.gifso 4am rolled around, and after lots of smooching, just because im a nice guy, i offered the girl a lift home, and she leaned in and said a little something in my ear that made my torso look like this from the front http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2793/i1971uy.jpg ....but like this from the side
http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8049/i2129ct.jpg now you guys might think that im some sort of man ho, but really bors, im not, and i decided to save it (and her) for another night when we were both fresh. so we get in the car and i start driving her home, when the little tarts hands started wandering in places they probably shouldnt have, and my driving looked a little like this http://img117.echo.cx/img117/3581/i1847kw.jpg so i said to her http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8062/i0666gz.jpg you little shit i cant drive like this, tomorrow is a better day for this sort of thing! and she said "no way, theres http://img117.echo.cx/img117/8909/i2098sh.jpg this, were going to go http://img117.echo.cx/img117/2204/trafficsignssouboryregulatorya.jpg with this!!" lol the little octopus handed varmint
(i still said no, but we'll date later this week i think )so whats the moral of the story bors? that karma is a bit like this http://img117.echo.cx/img117/5678/i2165hw.jpg
I love the signs! 
