ugh, right when i think my life is fine, it falls in the shitter again

[Lee]

well today my friends mom (whos house ive been living at for around 3 weeks) told me i need to move out soon. 3 days ago my car died again, the tranny that was rebuilt 6 months ago, then never even driven til 2 weeks ago, went out. and the warranty expired july 4th. he might be nice and do the work since there isnt even 1000 miles on the transmission, but i dunno. i still dont have a job due to my car either being low on gas or not working. sometimes it would be easier to just not be alive.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Bro, I know how you feel. A few months ago, I was just looking into going back to school full time, when my pyscho girlfriend just became too much for me to handle, so I dumped her for the 4th time, but this time was so shitty to her that she didn't try to get me back. I felt really bad about doing, but had to do it even though I was totally in love with her. Explaining why would take about 3 pages. A week later I got fired from my job for something I didn't do. Then my ex-employer fought my unemployment benefits. In the city I live in, it is virtually impossible to find a job in the summer that pays more than minimum wage unless you have a degree. Fortunely the job paid pretty well so I had money saved up (I was going to save for another year, then stop working and go to school full time until I graduate). Now, in the mean time I've been trying to diet down on tren and a keto diet, which plays havoc on your mood. Well, anyway things are beginning to work out. I'm getting $300 a week (for now at least) in unemployment, after about 6 weeks of fighting them. I'm about to sue for sexual harassment. I'm back in school, and just retook a speech class I dropped some time back because I couldn't stand to give speeches. I finished the class last week, and got an A. I'm using my unemployment, and lack of visable income to apply for alot of government aid, so that I can finish school. I've come to terms with some things from my past that have totally screwed up my life (the details I don't feel comfortable talking about on this board). The only thing that doesn't seem to be working out is my love life. Getting laid is easy enough, but finding someone for a relationship isn't working. Still, things are looking better now. Just hang in there bro and don't give up.

 

[Serea]

Sorry to hear your bad luck, guys. Hope it turns around for you both soon.

 

[The Red Dragon]

Sorry to hear about that guys. Good luck with everything.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Serea, and Red Dragon, thanks for the sympathy. I'll be ok, things are looking up now. Really, I just wanted to show Lee that he is not alone, and that if you just keep giving it everything you have, eventually things start to work out. We all go through hard times, and feel like giving up. Some of us atually start feeling like eating a bullet would be alot easier than trying to keep going when it looks like life is hopeless. Bro, I've been there. But eventually it gets better. Tough times don't last, but tough people do. I'm sure you've heard that expression before. It's true though. You just have to hang in there, and keep fighting.

 

[Lee]

the thing is, ive been "haning in there" for the past 5 years of my life. It starts too seem pointless. My life has been so fucked because of my parents and now that I got kicked out, and I seriously have 21 dollars to my name right now. My dad didnt give me any help when he kicked me out, and now hes moving to a different state. My mom is useless, i havent even seen her in a year and she makes as much money as most high school students. Now that I have no car i cant get a job, and if i dont have a job i cant get a place to live. life doesnt even seem worth the trouble anymore.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Lee, I know how you feel, believe me. 9 weeks ago, I had a round chambered and was looking down the barrel of a gun. I had a choice to make. Not only because of the recent events, but because of something that happened to me years ago, my life had seemed like a fucking nightmare, that I couldn't seem to wake up from. I had to make a choice. Was I going to pull the trigger, or live, and try to make something of my seemingly hopeless life. I choose to live, and to try and make something of my life. That's because I realized, that you, I, and everyone else in this world has a destiny. A purpose. But it is up to each of us to fulfill that destiny. Even when it seems like there is no hope, when it seems like our lives are totally worthless, that destiny is right there in front of us. All we have to do is open our eyes and see it. Lee, I don't know if you believe god, or a higher power, but I can tell you that he believes in you. You are loved, and you have a purpose. Your life is worth it.

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Anyway, if you haven't been able to get a job apply for unemployment. You can usually do it online, depending on where you live. However, the longer you wait, the longer it will take to get a check. There are government agencies designed to help people who are broke, and can't find work, if they take the time to ask.

 

[sinjinsmythe33]

eating a bullet accomplishes nothing

im not going to tell you to 'hang in there', its trite and gets old very quickly. my situation is not as bad as yours, but i have learned that most of the adversity in life is self created (not sure if that is sound in terms of syntax or grammar?). i have pissed away a good job, good friends and stable lifestyle. i have wasted my life savings with gambling and other types of frivolity (sp?). every one of my friends is at least moderately successful, married, a homeowner with children. i have none of these things and dont anticipate that these will be available anytime soon. envy, resent and self pity can easily prevail. fortunately, i realize that midset is a waste of time. blaming others for problems or deficiencies my lifestyle created wont work either. dude, i will keep you in my prayers.

 

[The Red Dragon]

Well some things can go beyond our control. A parent essentially makes your or breaks you. I would suggest you get all the help at your disposal. Without that mailing address, acquiring job will be next to impossible. I don't know what to say because I'm unfamiliar with your situation nor do I have any business knowing. Just know that you can't give up, your whole life is at stake. I know this seems out of place for me to say but in your position you can't really mope, you have to be extremely resilient and you need to take action fast. You need every resource you can muster. I really hope things go well for you, I'm not going to tell you to hang in there because that's your choice but you must take action. You have my sincerest condolences. Can a parent 'legally' kick out a child who is less than 18?

Fin, good move with the education. It'll open up new windows of opportunity. Just remember that a women should be a tertiary goal after your education and finances. Be selfish, look out for yourself. Based on personal experiences, women are a hinderance to personal success, academic or otherwise. I almost had my university acceptance rescinded because of girls, pathetc and extreme I know. My grades dropped from straight A's, to D/F's, I had to drug up and study for hours on end to get my marks back up to a passing grade. If I had given up, I would have lost my acceptance and I would more than likely regret my actions. But I'm happy where I am now.

Sin it's great that you moved beyond a counter-productive mentality. My mood drastically changed for the better when I just burried my past mistakes and stopped comparing myself to others. As long as you learn from your mistakes... Having a wife and children is not important, I wouldn't sweat it. Think of marrying of fucking 1 pussy for the rest of your life, and kids being an overall burden and a drain of resources .

I guess what I'm trying to say is that wherever you come from in life, there will always be problems. But being strong is the ability to endure and survive through the problems. "Tough times don't last, but tough people do". Granted that some problems may have less hope than others, we really don't have a choice but to clash head on with the problems because its your only chance of recovering. That's my two cents...I really shouldn't be posting this due to my lack of experience...but I was hoping I'd be able to help.

Good Luck Everyone.

 

[guldukat]

Bro, I know how you feel. A few months ago, I was just looking into going back to school full time, when my pyscho girlfriend just became too much for me to handle, so I dumped her for the 4th time, but this time was so shitty to her that she didn't try to get me back. I felt really bad about doing, but had to do it even though I was totally in love with her.

That alone is rough, man.

Some people like to say that love is caring about a person more than you do yourself, but I always say, "If I'm a total wreck, I can't do much good to anybody can I?" You have to try and do something for yourself first in a lot of circumstances. I didn't abide by that and it nearly destroyed me, to the point that when it did come time to part ways I no longer had the strength to do what was right.

I think you did the right thing.

Explaining why would take about 3 pages. A week later I got fired from my job for something I didn't do. Then my ex-employer fought my unemployment benefits. In the city I live in, it is virtually impossible to find a job in the summer that pays more than minimum wage unless you have a degree. Fortunely the job paid pretty well so I had money saved up (I was going to save for another year, then stop working and go to school full time until I graduate).

That's a catch-22, isn't it?

On the one hand, to go to school, you need money...but you can't make enough money to comfortably afford it unless you've got a degree! Agh.

That's a great move, finishing school. Too many people get bogged down with things and don't get back. I was lucky in that my great-grandmother was Scrooge McDuck-rich and paid my tuition all 9 semesters, 10 actually counting summer school (one of those caused in part by my weakness during the bad break-up).

Now, in the mean time I've been trying to diet down on tren and a keto diet, which plays havoc on your mood. Well, anyway things are beginning to work out. I'm getting $300 a week (for now at least) in unemployment, after about 6 weeks of fighting them. I'm about to sue for sexual harassment. I'm back in school, and just retook a speech class I dropped some time back because I couldn't stand to give speeches. I finished the class last week, and got an A.

Outstanding! I hope the suit goes well for you.

I'm using my unemployment, and lack of visable income to apply for alot of government aid, so that I can finish school. I've come to terms with some things from my past that have totally screwed up my life (the details I don't feel comfortable talking about on this board). The only thing that doesn't seem to be working out is my love life. Getting laid is easy enough, but finding someone for a relationship isn't working. Still, things are looking better now. Just hang in there bro and don't give up.

Good advice.

Fin, I'm glad you're doing better. What you said in another post of this thread had me worried, as I've been down that path.

If you ever need to vent about the difficulties you've faced, let me know. My e-mail is open to anyone that wants it.

 

[beanball]

the thing is, ive been "haning in there" for the past 5 years of my life. It starts too seem pointless. My life has been so fucked because of my parents and now that I got kicked out, and I seriously have 21 dollars to my name right now. My dad didnt give me any help when he kicked me out, and now hes moving to a different state. My mom is useless, i havent even seen her in a year and she makes as much money as most high school students. Now that I have no car i cant get a job, and if i dont have a job i cant get a place to live. life doesnt even seem worth the trouble anymore.

I don't know squat about your situation other than what you've said, so I'm not gunna give one of those "I can relate" posts. I can say I"ve had my share of financial difficulties. I guess across the board in life, if all you make yourself believe you can do is "just hang on" then that's what you will do. But moving beyond that involves waking up each morning with a plan on how to make things better. Plan for short term and long term. Obviously both are important for survival. As for making ends meet with no cash to get on your feet, find a job in a restaraunt/bar as a barback even if you have no experience. The restaraunt industry takes care of its own, and you're likely to find a roommate through there, and there's always food there too. Finding a place to stay will only be a problem for a week or two - you'll be making cash and worst case scenerio you can stay in a hotel with that. Overtime is generally not a problem in that industry either, since most money is made from tips. After a few months of experience you can move to virtually any restaraunt in the English speaking world. That gives you freedom. Moreover, that gives you the ability to stop living hand-to-mouth, and save a few bucks here and there to plan long term.

Other industries can give the same opportunity, I only mention the restaraunt industry because it's familiar to me. WHat is important isn't the industry though. It's getting out of the "just hanging on" mentality, getting a plan, and getting past the days that suck in order to get to the days that don't suck. It doesn't happen over night, but it never happens without a plan . . .

 

[louden_swain]

Lee,

Sorry to here about all of this.

If I were you, I would think about joining the military. . . by serving your country, you can earn some money for college, plus you are guaranteed food, shelter, and training.

 

[c3bodybuilding]

Lee, you are getting all sorts of great advice from everyone. The only thing I can add, is that it is now time for you to be strong. All this nonsense talk about living not being worth it has to end. You are a strong person, and will make it through this. Follow a lot of the GREAT advice given in above posts, and keep a tough mindset, and you will get through this. Probably a year from now, you will be in a different position in life, and look back at this with a chuckle.

 

[gettinlarger]

Lee,

Sorry to here about all of this.

If I were you, I would think about joining the military. . . by serving your country, you can earn some money for college, plus you are guaranteed food, shelter, and training.

That ain't a bad idea.

Remember man, as shitty as you think your life is, there's always someone who has it worse than you that is fighting harder. You want to see someone with a shitty life? Go visit a children's burn unit in the hospital. Or a cancer ward.

I hope things pull through for you bro. You're a good guy, and don't deserve the life you are telling us about.

Stay strong man.

 

[guldukat]

well today my friends mom (whos house ive been living at for around 3 weeks) told me i need to move out soon. 3 days ago my car died again, the tranny that was rebuilt 6 months ago, then never even driven til 2 weeks ago, went out. and the warranty expired july 4th. he might be nice and do the work since there isnt even 1000 miles on the transmission, but i dunno. i still dont have a job due to my car either being low on gas or not working. sometimes it would be easier to just not be alive. [/B]

I know. It's always easier, young bro, but it's never better.

I'm really sorry to hear about your difficulties, Lee.

I know you've been hanging in there for a long time and are tired. You had to become a man when most your age are still little boys, which just isn't fair to you.

But you've already gotten this far, purely on your own. You've worked too hard to get to the point where you really can do something to get your life on the track you want--to MAKE things "fair." One day sooner than you realize, your own family will greatly benefit from a strong, self-reliant dad and husband.

It seems like pure hell now; I can only imagine, really, what it must feel like. But you will make it better. I know it. DO fight for yourself a bit longer...you're frustrated, I know, but that's all those negative influences talking, NOT you.

Just awhile longer, be the Lee we've all seen in these forums--the strong young man who takes things by the balls. You are strong, too, whether you realize it or not. Lots of people quote Nietzsche, but men of character, men like you, are THE reason he wrote, "Was mich nicht tötet, macht mich stärker."

What does not kill me makes me stronger.

 

[guldukat]

Re: Re: ugh, right when i think my life is fine, it falls in the shitter again

Lee,

I think Louden has a superb idea. Military service is always a good option. You'd certainly have an easier time with the physical aspects of it than most men your age

 

[mikey297]

Things happen for a reason bro. Hang in there and know that whatever trials you face can only make you stronger in the end.

Have faith.

 

[spatts]

Beanball gave you some solid advice for a plan. Working as a server will be instant cash, and you can walk home with money in your pocket and a job to list on your rental application right away. Like he said, they take care of their own. That's no joke. Millions of people have it better than you, and millions of people have it worse. Get a plan, and act. Don't blame your parents even if they are responsible. They may have "fucked you up," but if you keep fucking yourself, that's all you. Show them how it's done...move on, move up.

 

[Liftbig]

tipped jobs are good. i deliver pizzas and i usually take 60-70 dollars home on a good night. working as a waiter wouldnt be a bad gig either, plus people tip more usually at restuarants.

 

[jeremys]

bump on the military

right now i'm sitting on base at my aunt's place. she pays for NOTHING except her cable/telephone. all her student loans get paid off after a while, she's got a nice damn car, lots of money, and she knows she's doing something honorable

 

[louden_swain]

bump military

plenty of training in the military

 

[JollyRogers]

Where all here to learn

You have a lession to learn in life right now, a boiling point, can you overcome it?

I know you can, dont look at the problem, look outside

Be strong Bro !

 

[Zander1983]

Lee, that's a very mature stance you're taking. You'll get through this and be such a stronger man for it.

 

[Lee]

tommorow im gonna wake up early and me and my friend are gonna tow my car up to the house im staying at so it doesnt get impounded. im gonna try to get ahold of the guy who did the work on it to see if he'll fix it since his parts failed. then im gonna go find a job, not just look, find. im so sick of my life getting in the gutter and me letting it stay there. although being 17 and having to learn how to support yourself is pretty fuckin hard, especially without parental guidance. sure, my life sucks shit right now, but im gonna make it better. its my turn to do what i want, and i want to make my life better.

 

[chrisindfw]

Hang in there...

Well, after all the good advice given, there is nothing to say except for hang in there.

I am 25 and have been laid off 7 times in 3 years. In 2001 alone I was laid off 3 times, got a divorce, house got foreclosed on, and laid off the friday before christmas.

You learn by everything that happens. Everything that happened will just make you stronger.

 

[from zero]

"Maybe things happen for a reason
and wherein lies the answer
to overcome the grieving
of life's unruly lessons,
I'm handed in succession,
It builds my pain which makes me strong ..."

 

[JollyRogers]

Im laid off right now, its been 2 weeks, Ive been fixing computers for people right now on the side and been doing secerity at a club on saterdays, do whatcha gotta do !

and Im on another comp right now..lol wish it had a spell checker lmao

 

[Backlash]

Sounds like you found the motivation to get back on track Lee. I know you can do it.

I just saw this thread today (been on vacation), but I noticed something BodyByFinaplix mentioned and I have to say

SUICIDE IS NEVER THE ANSWER. EVER.

Anyone who is down on their luck and thinking about it come to my house and eat all my food and I'll whip some sense into you.