My Father just passed away.. Inkman69

[Inkman69]

Hey everyone just needed someone to talk to right now. I just lost my father last week. My father was the strongest man I ever knew. He was not afraid of anything except for my Mother!!. He fought in WW2 and the Korean War and won several medels including a bronze star and a purple heart He was always there to help when you needed it. I watched him die slowly over the last few months and I knew he could not stand feeling so helpless cause he was such a proud and strong man.My Mother died of lung cancer in April I too had to watch her waste away to nothing before my very eyes.

I just got married on the 24th and I have been off cycle now for about a month. I really feel like I am losing it right now. I can't deal with the DEPRESSION anymore should I go back on cycle to help me though this. I don't want it to effect my marriage to my new wife due to the depression I am in. I don't feel like myself anymore. I have not trained or eaten right for weeks now and am loseing lbs of hard earned muscle. I don't seem to enjoy anything anymore lately except being with my wife. Here is what I use to look like...

 

[Torchy]

I am sorry for your losses. Only time will let you heal. Keep your chin up and shoulders back. He was always there for you and it's tough to watch the ones we love pass. My feelings are with you. Be strong

 

[takniteasy]

I am very sorry to hear of your losses. Please hang in there and lean on your wife for your strongest support. Gather strength from her and believe that this difficult time will further strengthen your marriage. I have you in my prayers.

 

[nikkita]

I'm sorry to hear about your losses...

I'm making a prayer for your dad and for you. Let God help you heal your wounds of the losses you have been through, and specially this one that is so recent. I've also lost members of my family... I think about them every day and every second... I think on the strenght they gave me to go through tough situations and how they wanted me to always give the best of myself... I know it may sound hard, because it is very recent, but eat, train and gradually start doing anything you are not doing anymore.... not doing it will make you go deeper and blue... and may even affect other aspects in your life. If you feel like talking about anything we are always here.

 

[Sassy69]

My condolences to you Inkman. Loss of people you love is always painful and there is a period of time that you need to let yourself grieve. You will know when you are ready to go back to the gym, etc. I might suggest you go back just to find a physical outlet for a very emotionally draining experience... but you may not feel like going back just yet. An important thing is to not develop a guilt trip for not going to the gym, etc. in addition to the emotional stress you are going thru right now, so don't worry about that. The good news is that when you do go back, you always seem to pick up quickly from where you left off. Most definitely rely on your wife & your marriage to heal. Your wife will understand the stress you are going through and be there for you. You might talk to her about how you feel about your situation and how it is affecting you - falling back to bad eating habits & no training -- suggest that she join you in the gym & w/ cleaner eating. I know when I am really stressed, I sort of lose control of everything and rely on food as my emotional crutch. If you can work with her to get support and take control of the eating & training a little more it might help, first by adding the diet & training back into your lifestyle and second, to spend more time with your wife in a productive environment to help further reduce the stress you are holding.

As much as it sounds lame, also remember that time heals. When you have a huge upset in your life, you go into a bit of a panic state and many of your decisions and activities are driven by your emotions. But then one day you hit the point where you get sick of that way of living and you make the decision to take control again. And your loved ones will be there to support you. The best thing you can do is maintain excellent communications with your loved ones during this time and also treat yourself well. Make the trip to the gym or a nice, clean sit down dinner a treat instead of a chore or a distraction.

You and your wife are in my thoughts.

 

[trial0rzgrl]

i am so sorry about all your losses..
my advice is to stop thinking about your body and work on your mind and your emotions.... you really have to get things together in life before you get into your cycles again... it might just make everything worse... i was at a very low point a couple months ago and was forced to take a break.. although i was not happy with what happend to my body i needed it to keep it together and though i am still working on alot, i am ready to start again... if you put too much attn on workingout now it might become a huge obsession and might cause further problems.... just rememer to stay away from extremes and try to ask your new wife for help (congrats).. i wish you the best and god luck!

 

[thecockdiesel]

I'm sorry Inkman, you and your family will be in my prayers.

 

[we5happy]

A way better place...

I know its hard to think of this way...I just lost my nanny yesterday to cancer. If you lost your mom in April they are dancing up the heavens now together...He really is in a better place now and will suffer no more... I am so sorry for your loss...but maybe dont think of it as a loss for you but a gain for him.

I'm so sorry.
We

 

[grlpwrd]

I am new here and lurk to gain information and have read your posts here, but I just wanted to extend my condolences to you in such a sad time of your life.

I can't say how you should feel, but may you continue your training as a testiment to your parents and their love for you. After all, they gave you life ... so live it. As a parent myself I would want my kids to live life to the fullest, kwim?

I'm sorry for your losses...may you find continued strength.

 

[BigEasy]

Ink, fellow old fart, we need to talk. Hushmail me the time, we both know the place.