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jenscats5
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+++++++++ Vibes & {{{{{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}}}}}}} for ya Merms!!
Good evening to you & I hope you had a good day today!!
Good evening to you & I hope you had a good day today!!
Mermaid 2006
- Thread starter mermaid
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Lady Viking
Well-known member
I´m also sending you lots of
Well the thing is, is that you have recognized the behavior.... Now you are actively going to seek out some help (EF, doctor,friend's) Noone ever said changing a life-time of habits is going to be quickly and easily changed. You are not the only one who has been in such an emotinal dump and ate a box of chocolates. If it makes you feel better I purchased pretty Godiva chocolate gifts for Christmas, and then Valentine's.... Ummmm Yeah One for them, two for me, one for them two for me..... We all go through different phases in life and this is one phase that you will get through and surpass and even though right now it seems like everything is out of control and you feel helpless, you will look back and it will seem like nothing.mermaid said:Thanks for that Aries!
SBT
Que and Roony
Jens -it's 8.30 Friday am now, should be at work but going in a bit later today.
Love the pic, Bunns. There are some great mermaid pics out there.
So, yesterday, my food consumption was OK but macros were probably slightly off. Had lunch and dinner meetings and stuck to mostly vegetarian foods so protein was low but I feel better for it today (things are "moving" well).
AM cardio, 30 mins bike, hill profile, level 6. No evening gym due to meeting with boss
And I did have 1 glass of red wine with dinner but funnily enough I don't feel bad about it. It tasted great and I only wanted 1.
I have just read Tre's post on emotional eating and I'm in a state of shock really, I felt like I was reading about myself in most parts and my understanding of my food issues have only become more acute. This is a good thing but uncomfortable nevertheless.
I have to come clean about something that I didn't post on Wednesday. I bought some gifts for a friend, one of which was a tin of luxury chocolate coated honey candied pecans. Lovely packaging, more expensive than you would pay normally for chocolate. I even had them wrapped, ready to ship. Well after another emotional moment at work in the afternoon and without any conscious thinking, I opened them up and ate the whole lot in about 10 minutes. I didn't even think about what I was doing until they were all gone. I then spent the rest of the day in a state of guilt and lied about it (well omitted it) in my journal that night. That's why I "missed" meal 4.
I have been on antidepressants on and off for some time in my adult life. I'm on them again now (started again September 05 when I started journalling). While, I must admit, my rollercoaster emotions are steadied, losing weight is more difficult because the drugs do tend to slow the metabolism down. Hence, I eat clean, train, see minimal progress, fall off the wagon, eat, don't lose weight etc. And I'm at the bottom of that cycle right now.
I've decided, today, to go and see my doctor and discuss coming off the pills. I have to learn to do this on my own. I am strong enough.
I feel sad now. I'd better go to work
It helps to have supportive people around who you can talk with. The one thing I did was I stopped and made a promise... If I'm going to eat that then I have to first go run 2 miles, etc.... Try throwing something like that into the mix. It's kinda mind screwing yourself...making you think I am going to eat that, but I have to go run 2 miles, and believe me most of the time you won't want it.. Sometimes you will. But it's forcing yourself to do something else. I had a few food fits even since I started dieting.... I was in tears because I wanted to eat ice cream so bad and because of my life-style and cutting I couldn't.... I was in a pissy mood for two days because of it. It's not easy but now look. I look back and think those two hell days that I got through and didn't submit to the ice cream God's I have lost all this body fat and feel really good.
It's trying to disassociate food with incidences that occur in life. Try and associate maybe taking a hot bath as a way to wash away the feelings and reenergize yourself. Invest maybe in some aromotherapy proucts that will enhance your mood a bit and bring you out of the dumps!!! Or grab a yoga dvd and do 30 minutes, or even 10 minutes of yoga to calm your mind.... Drink some hot tea flavored with something special like honey... You have to make the substitues before the time arrises or you're going to be clinging to food again. Have them ready and pull your computer up (plenty of people on here) and throw a log out there to talk with us instead of turning to food. Maybe we can help you talk it out even.. or take away that feeling of so desperately needing "X" or you will die....
Again take it easy on yourself... you don't have to lie to us... be yourself, we will respect you much more with your honesty and your courage to post up what you are going through. Who knows maybe someday down the road someone else will be going through your same issues and will be able to read your daily log of the struggles you went through and be able to look to you as a source to help them.
Roonytunes
New member
Where you at, Mermie? Post up when you get a chance. I hope everything went well at your doctor's appointment.
Merm, we have way more in common than you thinktreilin said:Who knows maybe someday down the road someone else will be going through your same issues and will be able to read your daily log of the struggles you went through and be able to look to you as a source to help them.
Need Update .. we are here FOR you NOT to judge you or
into submission for a box of chocolate, a bag of cancdy, a pizza, 3 bottles of wine etc ... whatever it may be ... We you girl .. your post & admittance to yourself is more than most would do and have the GUTS to do on here ...I admire that in you.
mermaid said:I feel sad now. I'd better go to work
Smile honey, you have so many people who love and cheer for you, seriously.
I myself have just realized that admitting to something and being honest about what it's doing to your life is a major part of the battle ... amazing how we can kid ourselves about stuff.
Know that you're not alone darlin' we all have our own demons that hound us and are chained to us like some metaphorical albatross ...
Learning how to break those chains is among the most difficult of life lessons.
Either way, I hope you had a WONDERFUL day!
mermaid
New member
Thanks SBT Will check up with you tomorrow on flight details and plans.
Jens - I felt the vibes - thank you!
Scorp, thank you :Kiss:
LV,
PM to follow (and not an empty promise this time)
Really? Hard to accept......sometimes.......thank you, always meant, always heartfelt
Will check up with you tomorrow on flight details and plans.Jens - I felt the vibes - thank you!
Scorp, thank you :Kiss:
LV,
Always irresistableque_66 said:
Ah, there's my lady. Thank you, MM, you have mymusclemom said:
PM to follow (and not an empty promise this time)*Bunny* said:
Really? Hard to accept......sometimes.......thank you, always meant, always heartfelt
Appt on Tuesday am. I'm ready. Just needed some off time - elaboration to follow. Thank you, honeyRoonytunes said:
Thanks T. It's hard though, thought I would have it all worked out by now, isn't that what experience is for? Glad I posted it but ashamed at the same time, no one likes to admit their headspace is fu<ked on occasion(s). I promise though, no more cover ups.Treilin said:
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