Advice Needed! All Ladies Please Help!

[seventieschile']

A friend of mine is feeling depressed about her current weight. She is 5'4, 155lbs, approximately 30-35% body fat. I have begun to help her work out but prior to that she has never followed any type of workout regimen.
She is currently lifting weights 3 times per week and doing 20 minutes of cardio 3 times per week. MWF are lifting days, TTHSat are devoted to cardio. I am trying to educate her of the importance of high intensity cardio training considering she is only doing a total of one hour per week; however, her cardio sessions are usually about 60% intensity at max. Her lifting sets are as follows.

12 x 50% intensity ex. bench press
10x 60% intensity
8 x 70%
6 x 80%
12 x 90%
12 x 100% ex. switch to fly's.
Anyone familiar with the body for life will immediately recognize this workout.

Her diet is not as consistent as body for life recommends. Although she is eating relatively clean during the week, that is no junk foods, she is not timing her meals nor eating as many as recommended. She also allows her self one cheat day per week.
Her goal is to lose between 20-25lbs in two-three months. Is this a reasonable goal considering her exercises/ diet program?
Is there a better program for someone in her situation to follow considering her goals? What type of advice would you offer her?
I appreciate all responses.

 

[tonemeup]

Hi There,

I really hope I can help. I will tell you my story. I started Weight Watchers on 12/26/02. My beginning weight was 161 @ 5'4, my body fat was probably over 35%. Prior to weight watchers I tried working out on my own and eating right. I worked out atleast 5-6 times a week and couldn't understand why I wasn't losing the weight. Weight Watchers was a big eye opener for me. Your friend is so lucky that she has someone like you for support, but she may not want to take your advice. My husband tried to get me to eat clean and lift weights and I tried but I wasn't succesful fast enough and got discouraged and gave up. I lost 20+ pounds on weight watchers and it only took me three months. I did lose some muscle tone but I am now working on getting it back. I feel good about myself and can now commit to a real WORKOUT and a real DIET that is geared to help me develop Lean Muscle. See if she would be interested in something like Weight Watchers. Once the weight starts coming off that may be the incentive that she needs to really get into weight training, and into eating the right way. She will want to give up that cheat day and she will start eating at the right times once she finds her motivation.

This is just my oppinion, but I hope it helps. Good luck!

 

[staw]

I would like to know a bit more about her diet. Examples of food eaten as well as how often. What does she eat before going to bed? Also, when is she doing cardio?

20-25 pounds in 2 months is at best overly optimistic. Assuming I have calculated correctly, that means 2.5-3.1 pounds per week. Simply don't believe that is a healthy rate (in this situation). Would hate to have her get frustrated and give up.

I understand how important cheat days are for most people. The tendency is to cheat at dinner or cheat all weekend. That isn't ideal. If she is not doing this already, you may want to recommend she use lunch as a cheat meal and hit the gym after. Or she could do something active outside for an hour. You can really destroy a great deal of hard work and effort with one huge cheat dinner.

Another suggestion, up the cardio. Not necessarily the intensity but definitely the time. I dropped the intensity and have been going much longer. 60 minutes on non-lifting days and 35-60 minutes on lifting days depending on how hard I pushed it during lifting. I do not split up my cardio sessions (thanks WarLobo) and have been getting great results.

 

[seventieschile']

Her typical diet consists of 3-4 meals per day. For example todays breakfast was a Hot ham (not lunch meat) and non fat cheese sandwich on whole wheat bread and a glass of water. After her workout, which usually takes place around 12 or 1, she will have a protein bar. Appxy two hours later she will have some type of gourmet healthy lunch made from a recipe she or I found either online or Men's Health. For example, whole wheat spaghetti with chicken breasts and low-fat home made sauce. Finally she will eat a healthy gourmet dinner. For example, lean steak with mashed potatoes and steamed vegetables.
Once again, keep in mind these meals are not on any sort of time schedule. And she will miss or add meals depending on how she feels at the moment. Her cardio is usually done first thing in the morning on an empty stomach.
I usually have one cheat day a week myself, I was always under the assumption (well actually I've always read and heard) that one cheat day a week was a necessity. First, its reduces stress and makes the diet more achievable thus reducing non cheat day binges and secondly, physiologically speaking it fools your body into thinking that you are not in calorie deficit, thus preventing the metabolism from lowering. I do understand that it is a bit more complex than that but from what I do understand it is a way of fooling our hunter gatherer foundations.
Anyways, can cheat days really as counterproductive as you imply?

 

[staw]

Cheat days can be a very good thing. However, they can also wreak havoc depending on how much cheating you do. If you go out to dinner and have a calamari appetizer (or 3-4 pieces of bread before dinner), 12 oz. steak, potatoes and/or veggies, glass of wine, a dessert, that is a tremendous amount of food in one sitting. Unless you plan on doing cardio in the bedroom for about 3 hours, you just went totally overboard. This meal would be especially bad if you merely did 20 minutes of cardio in the morning and ate only 2 times before dinner. Because she does not eat that often, the portions are probably too big.

I understand you provided an example, but I saw no fish/tuna, egg white omlettes, etc. Healthy dinner and mashed potatoes I'm not so sure should be in the same sentence. I suppose it depends on how they are prepared and how much she eats. There are leaner carb alternatives. Glad to see she is eating veggies and protein bars.

Another question... does she drink coffee? Not a regular cup of coffee with some milk, but a fancy shmancy coffee from Starbucks or the like. The calories, fat and carbs in those things is sky high. Not that you or your friend would think like this, but some people think "It's just a drink, it doesn't count." At 400-600 calories a pop, 5 days a week, you would probably make your pantyhose catch fire. Drink water!

In one sense, she is cheating every single day. She's cheating herself out of eating enough food. This can cause serious binging, especially at night. Personally, when I eat every 2.5 hours (or so), I don't feel the need to cheat all that often. I have replaced my desire for sweets with a desire for protein shakes, chicken, etc. Alright, except that one certain time of the month when I am temporarily insane.

Don't get me wrong, I completely applaud her efforts. Did not intend to come off as highly negative. Also think cheat days can be invaluable, if done correctly (ie. not going all out at the all you can eat buffet).

 

[Pink Space Biscuit]

If she's not ready to commit to eating a proper diet with the proper foods at the right times then there isn't much you can do for her, unless you want to force feed her like a baby.

Healthy choice meals aren't good...

Pasta everyday isn't good...

Protein bars everyday aren't good...

If she followed the actual BFL book advice she'd be much better off. A balance of a real meat and good carb...

The slimy sodium filled slime slab in a microwave meal isn't a good meat and the servings are usually too high in carbs and too low in protein.

 

[staw]

"slimy sodium filled slime slab." Now say that 5 times fast.

 

[seventieschile']

Well she is not a coffee drinker and she doesn't binge at night. I try to preach six small meals a day but that can become overwhelming for someone who is just getting involved in the healthy lifestyle. I think she needs to speak with or meet some other women that have or are currently involved in this lifestyle. I can tell her what she needs to do and how she needs to do it, but there is only so much I can do. She has to take the appropriate steps herself. Although she has confided in me numerous times that losing weight is one of her 3 top goals in life at this moment, I am beginning to think its a question of motivation. How would you handle the situation if you were in my shoes; that is if a very close friend of yours asked you for help, but didn't necessarily follow your advice precisely. Most people don't understand the level of commitment necessary to meet such daunting goals. I guess the first thing I should do is educate her on the benefits of using this website; although she is already familiar with it. I'm at wits end. Any suggestions.

 

[AGENT SHAGWELL]

2 Things:

1-She's not used to an exercise routine, so don't be strict on the cardio intensity. Utilizing a low intensity cardio for longer period of time will help her lose fat as well, and prevent her from being discouraged from the start. Also, have her take a cup of coffee, or a 200mg caffiene pill prior to cardio to increase fat burning.

2-Diet. I disagree that cheat days are bad. All in moderation. And knowing female cravings all too well, as with other things one "obstains" from, there will come a breaking point, which could and will likely lead to a "pig out" moment. Constrained "bad food eating" is good mentally and physically. I have 3 suggestions on the diet....

1-end the day meal with only fiberous vegetable carbohydrates (NO mash potatoes)
2-eat at least 4 meals a day (although 6 is my magic number) and timing is needed, large lasps in time between meals triggers impulse eating and over eating
3-at first stick to foods she likes in the proteins, don't be too strict on fat amount, this can be more regulated as she gets used to the diet, and carbs let her eat any vegetables she likes, no starches unless they are eaten early in the day, same goes for fruit.

She gained the weight over a period of time, allow her mind and body the lose it gradually, going to strict to fast will lead to fall out...... I think the mere cardio in the am will lead to enough fat loss to notice changes.

 

[vinylgroover]

Well she is not a coffee drinker and she doesn't binge at night. I try to preach six small meals a day but that can become overwhelming for someone who is just getting involved in the healthy lifestyle. I think she needs to speak with or meet some other women that have or are currently involved in this lifestyle. I can tell her what she needs to do and how she needs to do it, but there is only so much I can do. She has to take the appropriate steps herself. Although she has confided in me numerous times that losing weight is one of her 3 top goals in life at this moment, I am beginning to think its a question of motivation. How would you handle the situation if you were in my shoes; that is if a very close friend of yours asked you for help, but didn't necessarily follow your advice precisely. Most people don't understand the level of commitment necessary to meet such daunting goals. I guess the first thing I should do is educate her on the benefits of using this website; although she is already familiar with it. I'm at wits end. Any suggestions.

She is the only one that can do it. You can guide her in the right direction, but you can't do the work for her. For her to say she's committed is one thing, to follow it up with actions is another.

The workouts and cardio don't sound to bad. I don't necessarily think she's doing too little cardio. I would probably advise 3 sessions at 30 minutes each. The key is diet......cardio will supplement her diet.

Get her to restructure her carb intake so that she's eating carbs earlier in the day or immediately after working out......these are the times that the body is least likely to turn those carbs into fat.

Why does she want this to happen in 3 months. You have to instill on her that this is a commitment to a healthy lifestyle, not some crash fad that will happen overnight. Set small periodic goals which are readily achievable and tangible......so what if it takes four months, and extra month is not much in the context of the rest of your life.

I'm training a girl at the moment who doesn't follow what i say because she's easily distracted........i figure that she won't achieve the goals she wants for herself simply because she won't do what's necessary, but at least she's maintaining where she's at and not regressing.

Motivation needs to come from within.