You said it pretty well. NO way to explain it really. I tell myself the same thing. I took it for granted too when I was married. I violated her trust though and for her sake I can't go back, not now anyway. been seperated, damn, almost a year now. haven't filed the papers just yet but i feel liike i may have a surprise waiting on me when I get back home in a couple of months. Wack....is an understatement though.