And yet another update thread on the ex

[gonelifting]

Remember what you said at your last communication with her. Are you a man of your word? She`s contacting you when you told her not to. I think your sanity is more important than a softball game. I can understand how you don`t want to see her, so don`t. or... E-mail back saying the Softball is your thing and tell HER not to go BECAUSE of what you said about seeing/communicating with each other.

If she refuses, then YOU should not go. That`s just what I would do. Stand your ground. I`m sure that is`nt a popular way of doing it... but if you go, it would reduce your "No contact" message to nothing but an emotional outburst that made you feel better that day.

 

[velvett]

Remember what you said at your last communication with her. Are you a man of your word? She`s contacting you when you told her not to. I think your sanity is more important than a softball game. I can understand how you don`t want to see her, so don`t. or... E-mail back saying the Softball is your thing and tell HER not to go BECAUSE of what you said about seeing/communicating with each other.

If she refuses, then YOU should not go. That`s just what I would do. Stand your ground. I`m sure that is`nt a popular way of doing it... but if you go, it would reduce your "No contact" message to nothing but an emotional outburst that made you feel better that day.

Ouuuuuu good answer.

 

[ringperm]

Of course it's natural to notice but she was asked not to contact him and yet she found the need to anyway. If she were sensitive she would not continue to appear in his life in any way or form.

I dated a guy who's ex behaved the very same way and they broke up months prior to my meeting him the very same as as Lestat. After three years of her passive aggressive behavior and final straw of her dropping by his house near midnight b/c she ran out of gas (yah ok) I was like "you can have him".

I mean it's over - they are not dating, thay can't be friends at this point in time - why, WHY contact this person if you know it will hurt them?

I see your point, but are these situations comparable. I might be missing something here. But I was under the assumption that she hadn't contacted him since she was told not to. When two people are working for the same company, do you excpect that the one that broke it of, to stay away from work related functions to avoid hurting the ex? Especially since it has gone a few months since the breakup?
I'm just askin, since this strikes me as odd. But we're all different I guess.

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

Her email is praiseworthy for its maturity and directness. I am at a loss to understand why Lestat cannot handle this interaction as if it were with any other adult.

B: Hi Sarah.

S: Hi Brian. How's it going?

B: Not bad.

S: Cool. Good luck in the tournament

B: You too, catch you later.



She's over you. Follow her example; she's doing more than a little to be courteous to you.

 

[alien amp pharm]

This is why you don't date coworkers. No offense.

 

[Dial_tone]

Remember what you said at your last communication with her. Are you a man of your word? She`s contacting you when you told her not to. I think your sanity is more important than a softball game. I can understand how you don`t want to see her, so don`t. or... E-mail back saying the Softball is your thing and tell HER not to go BECAUSE of what you said about seeing/communicating with each other.

If she refuses, then YOU should not go. That`s just what I would do. Stand your ground. I`m sure that is`nt a popular way of doing it... but if you go, it would reduce your "No contact" message to nothing but an emotional outburst that made you feel better that day.

what about you, tough guy? Did you actually get cigarettes or not?

 

[velvett]

But I was under the assumption that she hadn't contacted him since she was told not to.

Did you read the first post on this thread?
If was about an email from her to him.

 

[Forge]

If it were me Lestat, I'd go to the game, have fun, and be curtious and nice to her. Don't go out of your way to say hello or anything, but if she says hi then be nice back to her, and no matter how much it hurts keep your poker face on. Show her that you can be OK without her.

She will leave that game thinking how together you are and wondering why she ever left you, that's the best revenge of all.

 

[ringperm]

Did you read the first post on this thread?
If was about an email from her to him.

Yeah I know, apart from that one. (insert blush smiley)
But that's some of the whole point. This was not some sort of message from someone trying to gain power over the other. As I mentioned earlier, it was more of a heads up, telling him that she will attend the softball tournament. And since he's still hurting, and might be interested in avoiding her further, she gave him the opportunity to continue to do that. There is no power game being played here like I see it. I think she has trouble with how to deal with this herself, and is doing the best she can living her life without making any (more?) unnecessarry blunders

But what do I know. I don't even know the girl. If I'm wrong, I blame it on cultural differences

 

[velvett]

Yeah I know, apart from that one. (insert blush smiley)
But that's some of the whole point. This was not some sort of message from someone trying to gain power over the other. As I mentioned earlier, it was more of a heads up, telling him that she will attend the softball tournament. And since he's still hurting, and might be interested in avoiding her further, she gave him the opportunity to continue to do that. There is no power game being played here like I see it. I think she has trouble with how to deal with this herself, and is doing the best she can living her life without making any (more?) unnecessarry blunders

But what do I know. I don't even know the girl. If I'm wrong, I blame it on cultural differences

OH I totally agree.
I had suggested earlier since they have history together she would know if whether or not an email such as that, even a non threatening one as that could be taken to heart in a greater way.

Hope that makes sense.