Can a man be faithful to one woman?

[SlipROCK]

Great post B. MOM

I've been married 5 years,dated my wife for 3 years before that.Never in all my life cheated on a "girlfriend" or my wife until earlier this year.I was gone out of town because of work for a week.All my buddies,coworkers, all went to night clubs that weekend and I declined,because thats just asking for trouble.So me and a few guys went to a strip club.No chance there right?....wrong.
I meet a nice girl in there, we talked all night.I got a little tipsy and asked if she wanted to go to breakfast.She said yes and all I will say from there is I made the most terrible mistake I've ever made.

I've never told my wife, because we are best friends.We've never had a problem.We do everything together.I know if I was to confess it would never be the same.

Just wanted to get that off my chest......I know there are'nt any excuses for what I did.It was about a 15 second window that everything went wrong.I get all twisted up in my stomach when I think about, but I could never tell my about it, because it would ruin everything.I LOVE her too much.

So tell me.Should I throw everything away because of one little mistake, that snowballed into a terrible terrible thing.

O well, needed to get that out there, never told anyone, not anyone.

PEACE

 

[Mtime1]

SlipROCK.........Chill out !

Everyone fucks up. Forget about it ! It's great you love her so much but men are wired much different than women. If you tell her, it's all over. Women are all emotion. Whatever assets you own, you'll be giving away half. DON'T tell her. It won't solve or accomplish anything.

If you feel you need to confess, GO TO CHURCH and go to confession ! No one else needs to know because it's a small world and she WILL find out.

OK ? I hope this helps. Now, if you really like being married, take care of business, and make sure she's taking care of you.

Peace.

 

[The Dude]

Yes. If you make a commitment and then are unfaithful, well, then you're a fuck.

 

[dawgslappa]

Yep

The Dude had spoken.

 

[35andfeel19]

Bikinimon,

I read your two posts on the subject and I agree with just about everything you said except this.

Is infidelity a reason to end a marriage? Unless it is habitual, my answer is NO.

For me, That would be the end.

I guess, maybe, I'm a little bit of a hard liner on this one subject. Maybe it is related to how I feel about and percieve Sex.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I respect your feelings brotha....and I will not try and change your mind. But when one has so much invested in a relationship (and I am not talking "He's really BEEN THERE for me" bullshit). I am talking 10+ years, a mortgage, 3 kids, 2 cars, a history, extended family etc and so forth - obviously there was a slow erosion that brought the relationship to the point where one or both stepped outside the confines of their marital commitment. I strongly believe that the sex is THE LEAST of the trouble. That is why I do not believe that an infidelity necessarily demands the end of the marriage.

Sex can be the closest that two separate humans come to being one.....it can also be the most meaningless act performed by two individuals who happen to be in the same place at the same time engaging in the act for THEIR OWN REASONS.

What would kill me MORE is a breach of trust or an emotional infidelity......these are not so cut and dry and not so tangible matters - thereby making it MUCH MORE difficult to mend once it has been broken down.

Just my .02

 

[Frackal]

Ya you can be 100% faithful. If you love the girl to the point where you look at other girls with about the same interest as ones in movies or on television. ie, You note that they are pretty but that is all the farther you ever go with it.

Cheating is a fucking selfish bullshit act to commit against someone you supposedly love.

 

[havoc]

This thread is hilarious.

 

[LawDawg8]

I can see where you're coming from, Bikinimom, and though you make a good point, are well-spoken, and intelligent, I must disagree. I view sexual relations IN A MARRIAGE from the two extremes - as one of the vanguards of fidelity and the other as the last bastion of true committment. Now, if it's just a relationship then MAYBE I could see your point... but my religious convictions preclude me from agreeing with your statement where vows have been exchanged.... Again, I'm no paragon of virtue, but that's just one thing I take VERY seriously.....

 

[crimson coal]

I agree. If i was ever cheated on no matter what the reason. Marriage over. I could NEVER have trust for that person again.