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Mtime1 said:Conan69.....If marriage is done right....
Problem is in this country more than half the people who are married don't do it right. They end up in divorse and that's where the men who have supported the family gets screwed.
THE MEN WHO HAVE SUPPORTED THE FAMILY?!?!?!?! WTF?!?!? Do you have ANY IDEA how much it would cost to have someone, cook, clean, to laundry, etc, etc and care for YOUR CHILD the way only a parent could?! (Notice I did NOT use the word "mother"? I firmly believe that if that is what the couple decides, the MAN could do just as good a job if not better at being the primary care-taker for a child....the fact that someone is in possession of breasts does not automatically mean that someone would be better qualified to care for a child!)
I think part of the problem is that men and women are NOT equals. We are mentally, internally "wired" differently. Physically we are not equals. Not to say men are supperior. There are many things men should not do that women can do.
In any parnership, personal or business, one person has to have 51 % say. One person has to make the final decision. If there is a major decision to be made the man should talk with his partner and discuss all options and consider his partners opinion and feelings if opposit of his. Ultimately the responsibility should lye on the mans shoulders. [/B]
Uuuummm, correction - you DID just say that the man IS superior!
And you are INCORRECT in the business thing. No one NEEDS to have 51% of ANYTHING - my husband and I own a business and guess what?! I have EXACTLY 50%. Am I the one that makes all the major decisions? Am I the one that even gets included on the day-to-day minor decisions, like say....where that outlet will be place? NO. The point is that while he is out turning the screwdriver, I am home caring for OUR children in a way that NO ONE CAN PUT A DOLLAR AMOUNT ON...however, I am sure that if a lawyer tried hard enough - he/she COULD.
The reason that many marriages today do NOT work out is because of men like you. (No Offense) But you do not have CLUE ONE about the difficulties of family life. So I suggest that you keep your ears open and your mouth closed.
True, there are waaaaaaay too many women out their that have delusions of granduer about what married life is all about. They do spend FAR MORE time picking out their china patterns and worrying about who will sit next to whom else at the reception than what the fuck she will do if she or her husband loses their job and suddenly they can not make the mortgage payment. Would he back her up if she changed her mind after being home with the baby after 6 months and decided that she would like to try and go back to work? Or conversely, would he support her decision to QUIT work and stay home with the baby (even though her income is substantial) because she feels that money is not NEARLY as important as the ever-quickly shrinking window of time when her child will need her like at NO OTHER time in his/her life? Would she be able to deal w/the financial strain if he decided he was not happy working upper level management and pulling over 6 figures, but wanted to try and pursue his passion for carpentry or art?
HELLO PEOPLE?! THERE ARE NO BLACK & WHITE ISSUES HERE!
One of the reasons that the divorce rate is so high is because women are sick and tired of being treated like shit and feel that they would rather struggle on thier own and be free than to stay in a miserable but "comfotable" life ....for the "sake of the kids". I firmly believe that it is far better for children to be parented by separate people who are not HELL-BENT on making each other miserable and can focus on the children than for them to grow up in a household where the anger and resentment only builds with time, thus causing the parents to be caught up in thier own BULLSHIT making it TOO EASY for the parents to ignore what is REALLY IMPORTANT....THE KIDS.
If this were a perfect world, couples would do what IS THE HARDEST = STAY TOGETHER AND TRY TO WORK THINGS OUT. But this is not always possible as it HAS TO COME FROM BOTH PARTIES INVOLVED. Many say they tried....but when only one is really willing to do the work - that is only delaying the inevitable.
....just my .02