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bader85's EliteFitness Contest 12wk log sponsored by NTBM/MrSupps
- Thread starter bader85
- Start date
Roxy722
New member
the farther away the ball the harder (and better) it makes it to do the pushup.. I literally barely have a foot on it the whole time so it doesn't roll away, not having it be completely solid also makes it harder.
I'm gonna try it out for sure. It's a great suggestion.
dont worry about numbers bro. Just squeeze and flex every rep. the strength will follow. I promise.
bader85
New member
Workout 2/22/11
forgot to weigh
WU: 10 min stepper 135 HR
Flat Bench BB: WU 75 x 10 x 2, 135 x 10
165 x 5, 185 x 3r x 10s, 135 x 9 fail
Bent Rows: WU 95 x 10 x 2
135 x 5, 155 x 3r x 5s, 135 x 5
(My back was pretty sore from rack pulls, I should of went one arm DB rows, I'll do that tomorrow)
Overhead Press DB: 35 x 10r x 3s
30 mins treadmill 2.6 spd 5.5 incline HR 145
Bench felt great, weight was perfect. Was pushing it to the max every set.
forgot to weigh
WU: 10 min stepper 135 HR
Flat Bench BB: WU 75 x 10 x 2, 135 x 10
165 x 5, 185 x 3r x 10s, 135 x 9 fail
Bent Rows: WU 95 x 10 x 2
135 x 5, 155 x 3r x 5s, 135 x 5
(My back was pretty sore from rack pulls, I should of went one arm DB rows, I'll do that tomorrow)
Overhead Press DB: 35 x 10r x 3s
30 mins treadmill 2.6 spd 5.5 incline HR 145
Bench felt great, weight was perfect. Was pushing it to the max every set.
bader85
New member
So guys.. I don't know if I'm having a mental breakdown, or am just overreacting.. hah.. but I'm feeling seriously stressed.
A lot of things keep going through my head.. and I guess I just get to vent, get over it, move on and commit.
So here's my vent, comment or not, thanks for reading.
I get discouraged quite frequently looking in the mirror. It's not about muscle, and/or definition, because both are coming in.. but frankly it's more of past energy that I hold on to. If you saw my fat pictures.. then you know I was huge, and with that hugeness caused _severe_ stretch marks, extra skin, and more than external an emotional wound internally.. and I kind of get an old energy about myself when looking in the mirror. I still have major stretch marks on my hips, my skin is very loose everywhere and after 6-7 years of losing 145 pounds it never ever has tightened back up and even having surgery looks sub-par and saggy. I feel like no matter how hard I can work on my body, my genetics and past transgressions will never permit me to look the way I deserve. It literally makes me so angry and even a hatefulness to myself that I had to be so overweight, and get so fat in my life cause now I'll never have the 'eye-popping and jaw-dropping' transformation I truly want... even then.. are my expectations too high? (I don't just speak of the 12 weeks, but this is something I'm working on this entire year and as long as it takes)
I really do hope that people viewing logs and eventually voting see my effort, and that I haven't been a weight lifter for years, I don't have muscle memory, and getting the results for my genetics is entirely new territory. I hate that I'm so tall, and have such gangly arms, and my strength sucks ass and I can't even bench my own bodyweight. I can gain 5 pounds in a week, but good luck getting rid of it in a month.
I keep telling myself that I am doing this for me, yes, but everyone knows that is it so hard not to compare myself to others in the contest, with amazing results already.. bottomline, if I come out of this a better person physically and even other things, mentally, spiritually, whatever.. that it was worth it 100%. Being in the financial situation I am however, it is a much bigger motivation to me to win this entirely. I feel very passionate about bodybuilding, the last year or so I really started studying and learning so much about it.. if I could do this for a living I would. Without having a job, it almost feels like it right now, and it's something I feel peace in. Pushing my body beyond its current ability, feeling the changes inside and outside.. I really do feel joy in my life the way I've lived it from the start of the year. Which makes other aspects of my life really take a turn.. so I'm really in some cross-roads here personally.
One thing I'd ask from viewers is.. what do you want to see more of out of me? What can I log for you, show you, be more detailed about? Is there something I can help with to a viewer that maybe is in my same position, shares a common issue, has a common past? PM me if you want to be discreet. I'd really appreciate some feedback.
Once again, thanks to everyone for the kind comments, the motivation, the assistance. I know I say it often, but trust me that anyone who participates in this with me is very much appreciated and you get to know that.
Back to the iron, keeping the diet clean.. one more rep.
A lot of things keep going through my head.. and I guess I just get to vent, get over it, move on and commit.
So here's my vent, comment or not, thanks for reading.
I get discouraged quite frequently looking in the mirror. It's not about muscle, and/or definition, because both are coming in.. but frankly it's more of past energy that I hold on to. If you saw my fat pictures.. then you know I was huge, and with that hugeness caused _severe_ stretch marks, extra skin, and more than external an emotional wound internally.. and I kind of get an old energy about myself when looking in the mirror. I still have major stretch marks on my hips, my skin is very loose everywhere and after 6-7 years of losing 145 pounds it never ever has tightened back up and even having surgery looks sub-par and saggy. I feel like no matter how hard I can work on my body, my genetics and past transgressions will never permit me to look the way I deserve. It literally makes me so angry and even a hatefulness to myself that I had to be so overweight, and get so fat in my life cause now I'll never have the 'eye-popping and jaw-dropping' transformation I truly want... even then.. are my expectations too high? (I don't just speak of the 12 weeks, but this is something I'm working on this entire year and as long as it takes)
I really do hope that people viewing logs and eventually voting see my effort, and that I haven't been a weight lifter for years, I don't have muscle memory, and getting the results for my genetics is entirely new territory. I hate that I'm so tall, and have such gangly arms, and my strength sucks ass and I can't even bench my own bodyweight. I can gain 5 pounds in a week, but good luck getting rid of it in a month.
I keep telling myself that I am doing this for me, yes, but everyone knows that is it so hard not to compare myself to others in the contest, with amazing results already.. bottomline, if I come out of this a better person physically and even other things, mentally, spiritually, whatever.. that it was worth it 100%. Being in the financial situation I am however, it is a much bigger motivation to me to win this entirely. I feel very passionate about bodybuilding, the last year or so I really started studying and learning so much about it.. if I could do this for a living I would. Without having a job, it almost feels like it right now, and it's something I feel peace in. Pushing my body beyond its current ability, feeling the changes inside and outside.. I really do feel joy in my life the way I've lived it from the start of the year. Which makes other aspects of my life really take a turn.. so I'm really in some cross-roads here personally.
One thing I'd ask from viewers is.. what do you want to see more of out of me? What can I log for you, show you, be more detailed about? Is there something I can help with to a viewer that maybe is in my same position, shares a common issue, has a common past? PM me if you want to be discreet. I'd really appreciate some feedback.
Once again, thanks to everyone for the kind comments, the motivation, the assistance. I know I say it often, but trust me that anyone who participates in this with me is very much appreciated and you get to know that.
Back to the iron, keeping the diet clean.. one more rep.
Dam str8 bro! Back to the dam gym and ONE MORE REP!
Good for you bader, good for you bro!
Best of luck and best regards,
Zed
Roxy722
New member
Bader..I've been thinking about your post all morning. I think venting is a great thing. If you've followed my log at all, you'll know I do it a lot!
I'm not sure if you know this about me but I lost about 140 lbs over a 2-3 year period, starting in 2006. I wasn't always fat either. I was a pretty good athlete up until about 23 and then life happened and I allowed myself to lose control. I used to think if I just lose weight, I'd be happy but soon discovered the term "skinny fat" and started with a trainer in the gym and here I am a few years later, still working on it. I have a lot of the same issues with loose skin, stretch marks and that deeper emotional wound. I honestly believe that changing yourself in a whole lifestyle way is as much a journey on the inside, as it is on the outside. I actually went and got some therapy to deal with the emotional reasons why I got fat in the first place but it's a challenge to change how you look at yourself and I find when I'm the most stressed or the most tired is when I'm more likely to go back to that "fat mentality" and have the self defeating thoughts.
Physically, I've learned that I need to be consistent in my diet and training. When I fall too far off the wagon, I gain quickly and it's always harder to get off. I ran a couple cycles last year which gave me a boost because I saw results quicker and felt really good and it did make a difference in some of my problem areas (not a huge difference but a little bit). Mentally, I think you are on the right track. You have to remember where you've come from and the bigger picture about why you are doing what you do. Building a great body is always a work in progress. The one thing I've learned about being involved in the bodybuilding culture is that even the people who have bodies I'd kill for, are NEVER satisfied and often feel worse about their bodies then I do about mine. People like you and I may never be on the cover of a magazine but to lose 145 lbs, to me, means you have guts and a strength of character that few people have! You know what it means to work hard and bust your butt.
Keep learning as much as you can. I have literally spent hours reading anything I can get my hands on regarding diets, training methods, nutrition and the science behind it. Become an expert in your own body. And you know what..allow yourself those days of feeling off. We all get them. Be kind to yourself and do what you did..let it out, regroup and keep up the fight!
Long past the end of this contest date, I'm sure your story will continue to inspire others around you.
I'm not sure if you know this about me but I lost about 140 lbs over a 2-3 year period, starting in 2006. I wasn't always fat either. I was a pretty good athlete up until about 23 and then life happened and I allowed myself to lose control. I used to think if I just lose weight, I'd be happy but soon discovered the term "skinny fat" and started with a trainer in the gym and here I am a few years later, still working on it. I have a lot of the same issues with loose skin, stretch marks and that deeper emotional wound. I honestly believe that changing yourself in a whole lifestyle way is as much a journey on the inside, as it is on the outside. I actually went and got some therapy to deal with the emotional reasons why I got fat in the first place but it's a challenge to change how you look at yourself and I find when I'm the most stressed or the most tired is when I'm more likely to go back to that "fat mentality" and have the self defeating thoughts.
Physically, I've learned that I need to be consistent in my diet and training. When I fall too far off the wagon, I gain quickly and it's always harder to get off. I ran a couple cycles last year which gave me a boost because I saw results quicker and felt really good and it did make a difference in some of my problem areas (not a huge difference but a little bit). Mentally, I think you are on the right track. You have to remember where you've come from and the bigger picture about why you are doing what you do. Building a great body is always a work in progress. The one thing I've learned about being involved in the bodybuilding culture is that even the people who have bodies I'd kill for, are NEVER satisfied and often feel worse about their bodies then I do about mine. People like you and I may never be on the cover of a magazine but to lose 145 lbs, to me, means you have guts and a strength of character that few people have! You know what it means to work hard and bust your butt.
Keep learning as much as you can. I have literally spent hours reading anything I can get my hands on regarding diets, training methods, nutrition and the science behind it. Become an expert in your own body. And you know what..allow yourself those days of feeling off. We all get them. Be kind to yourself and do what you did..let it out, regroup and keep up the fight!
Long past the end of this contest date, I'm sure your story will continue to inspire others around you.
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