Nice guys finish last...

[T-Matt]

^^^^

I completely agree. I have had some "nice guys" who automatically think that they are in love about a minute after meeting someone. They profess how much they care for you and kiss your ass, but none of it feels genuine. They lavish you with compliments, gifts, etc but they do so because they are in love with some fantasy of who you are instead of who you really are. It's too soon and there is an element of "quid pro quo" to the situation. The guy thinks, "Okay, so I have complimented you, been a shoulder to cry on, etc. Now you owe me. You are required to love me romantically." There is always this feeling of tension. It is very difficult to fall in love with someone when you have this huge pressure on you to fall in love.

I have never gone for "bad boys." I have always gone for the "nice guys." I'm just saying that sometimes the nice guys are not as genuinely nice as they profess to be.

Also, I dated one "nice guy" who was so sensitive that he was always crying and whimpering about where the relationship was going. It was CONSTANT! All that whimpering was so damned annoying. He needed to grow some balls and have some fun.

There is a difference between being a nice guy and being a doormat or a whimpering pansy. Also there is a difference in being a genuine nice guy and a guy trying to buy love with good deeds. I love genuinely nice guys.

And I have no idea why guys can't understand this!!!! As complicated as women can be, this is a simple concept!

I appreciate your post, as, it only confirms what I already knew.. I just have a no-bullshit approach to explaining women to other men..

T-Matt

 

[milo hobgoblin]

"I'm actually saving myself for marriage."

In College??

BWHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHA


In 20 years you are going to regret that more than ANY decision you have EVER made in this life, the next and the hudnreds of previous lives you've lived

 

[CrazyRussian]

I'd just like to say god bless you guys and lots of yall are right.

Gentlemen, what do young hot bitches want? What gets their attention? Do they want romance, long conversation, commitment, and snuggling? NOOO. They want drugs, parties, fucking, doing illegal shit, etc. It just comes down to interest level. Nice guys are not INTERESTING. I wouldn't want to hang out with, much less be in a relationship with, some girl who never did anything and just sat around and wrote me poems, even if she worshipped my ass.

``Personal story time`` = i consider myself a nice guy and cerebral, too...let shit get to my head a lot. But I try to make up for it by doing crazy shit like randomly visiting the girlfriend at 2 in the morning, going to crazy ass places, doing random ass shit. That way, you can still be nice/caring/respectful but still keep her interest level high enough to date you. So I contend that you don't need to be a full jackass, just have a WILD SIDE to you that's not afraid to come out. In Freudian terms, more ID, less EGO.

Thats just one mans opinion, tho

 

[Subzeero]

the bottom line to all these excellent points, especially by HeatherRae, *wink* *wink*, is HONESTY. Or in other terms, to be honestly yourself. Because no matter how hard a guy tries, a girl needs just a milisecond of eyecontact to spill all your guts out infront of her.

Be honest and respect yourself. Its okay if you don't get girls. There are more important and joyful things in life.

The moment you start feeling happy and comfortable, all alone just by yourself, that moment your life will turn around.

 

[muscleboundman]

The phrase really is true when it comes to girls. I mean, I'm in college and I always treat girls with respect. I guess thats a free pass to the "just friends" zone. I dunno, I'm not one of those jerks that is looking for a one night stand. I'm actually saving myself for marriage. I'm just looking for a good girl to actually have a relationship with. It just seems like all the girls I know are infatuated with idiots. I'll never understand why girls like jackasses. Anyone else out there finishing last?

Bro - ur way over thinking this shit. Girls don't go to college to get married. They go to have a good fuckin time. Sure they'd like to meet someone before they leave to get married, but that's not their primary desire.

ur smart to wait for sex until ur married. i started in jr high school, and trust me having slept with hundreds of women maybe didn't cause me to be divorced twice but it sure didn't fuckin help...

Bottom line, is another old saying "girls just wanna have fun", u can do that even if ur cool to not makin a hoe of yourself. if u can't show a woman a good time anywhere but the bedroom, then ur relationiships/marriage ain't gonna last very long anyway.

i figure u already know not to be a suck ass pansy so i won't go there. if u r then previous post are right, that won't get u a woman period. but u don't have to be a asshole either, just don't be so damn serious about ur life before ur freakin 25. ur a kid, have some damn fun...but seriously u don't have to be a whore to have fun.

 

[Bretmj1]

The phrase really is true when it comes to girls. I mean, I'm in college and I always treat girls with respect. I guess thats a free pass to the "just friends" zone. I dunno, I'm not one of those jerks that is looking for a one night stand. I'm actually saving myself for marriage. I'm just looking for a good girl to actually have a relationship with. It just seems like all the girls I know are infatuated with idiots. I'll never understand why girls like jackasses. Anyone else out there finishing last?

Hey man, it comes with time, and honestly - not assuming anything - but in all reality is has to do with personality and looks. Girls love guys that can sweep them off their feet with their unbelieveable charm, or guys that strike them as intriguing because they're 'different'. I treat girls with respect, but I have a heck of alot of personality for them to deal with, probably too much, and the girls dont stop coming. Its a matter of experience too, put yourself out there, dont 'change' and try acting like a dick, that wont work. You'll get a good girl, just dont have expectations, put yourself out there. Obviously there is something other guys got and you dont, so figure it out and make yourself better. There isn't any advice that we can give you that will literally help your chances, its all in your head buddy!

 

[blueta2]

agreed. nice guys finish last. girls are attracted to assholes,,,they see nice guys as "weak."

SO not true! We do not view nice guys as weak. Women view men who behave like boys as weak. Be a "man" and a nice guy and I bet the women come flocking.
Also let me say, younger women are more into the "bad boys". Older women have "been there and done that" and have zero tolerance for aholes anymore. So nice guys finish first ;-)

 

[reno240]

Women only marry the nice guys when they get done "sewing their oats" with the "bad boys"... Guys are trying to make sure that all these women "sew their oats" with them. So if a nice guy has to act like a prick in his early to late 20s so he can land a few hotties to bone, more power to him. Then when he gets tired of all that and wants to settle down, he acts like his true nice self and gets married.

 

[markshark]

"I'm actually saving myself for marriage."

In College??

BWHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHA


In 20 years you are going to regret that more than ANY decision you have EVER made in this life, the next and the hudnreds of previous lives you've lived

i dont have morals at all....i would fuck anything, and in 5 years of college not ONCE did i get any pussy.

 

[Bretmj1]

Its as simple as this: I don't believe in having to 'act' or having any 'game', girls like guys, and can tell when guys are being themselves, so be yourself. If you've heard you need to act a certain way to get chicks and actually believe it, then you're a nimrod Theres all sorts of sites that can help you out, but in all honesty, theres nothing you can read or do that can afford you to get women. You have to be yourself, and if the girl doesnt like you then obviously you'll find better, you'll get one someday and it will be worth the wait. If you absolutely feel like you need one now then you're impatient and good luck, but desperation will never get you anywhere!