New Poll: Your Worst Sex Story!!!

[Becoming]

Here is a funny one (not too bad) about my buddy in college - he did pretty well and as a result got "blacklisted" by a lot of the sororities on campus...

Anyways he is in bed with this chick and she tells him she doesn't want to have sex OR oral the first time - BUT she says they can get naked and fool around...

so they get naked, and he wants to bang her bad... so after a while he tells me he "takes his dong and puts it up against her leg/vagina) and asks her if she wants to do it" she says no - so they go back to fooling around... a little while later he does it again (puts it against her and asks her if she wants to do it)... again she says no...

repeat this scenario about 20 times that night, LOL

I can't remember exactly but I think he got no play... LOL...

 

[gonelifting]

Got my first blowjob at 16 years old by a 25 year old HOTTTTTTTTT as fuck woman. 9 or 10 seriously! Yes even now that I`m older she`s still hot, not because I was 16.

Anyway, We were outside in a public Ballfield at my highschool somewhere. After she swallowed she said "what`s your name" It was like a freaking porn movie, I swear.

We went to a nearby park and did it again. She kept telling me how deicious it was. lol I saw her a few times after that and I think she was married. Never banged her though. Every time I saw her, she would pick me up and park somewhere, blow me and ask me what I ate before hand because I tased so good. lmao That has always puzzled me.

It was cool.


That experience with the hottest chick ever telling me those things was a big confidence booster for a long time to come. Good times.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

um, gonelifting, this is the worst sex story thread, not the make goldendelicious cry thread

please fix it up

 

[ChefWide]

Got my first blowjob at 16 years old by a 25 year old HOTTTTTTTTT as fuck woman. 9 or 10 seriously! Yes even now that I`m older she`s still hot, not because I was 16.

Anyway, We were outside in a public Ballfield at my highschool somewhere. After she swallowed she said "what`s your name" It was like a freaking porn movie, I swear.

We went to a nearby park and did it again. She kept telling me how deicious it was. lol I saw her a few times after that and I think she was married. Never banged her though. Every time I saw her, she would pick me up and park somewhere, blow me and ask me what I ate before hand because I tased so good. lmao That has always puzzled me.

It was cool.


That experience with the hottest chick ever telling me those things was a big confidence booster for a long time to come. Good times.

I am not at all comfortable with getting a Demi Pudgeman while reading about you getting the wind blown out of your cuffs. Please have this thread deleted and JackDaniels applied to my bloodstream at once.
Thanks.

 

[deejay10]

I am not at all comfortable with getting a Demi Pudgeman while reading about you getting the wind blown out of your cuffs. Please have this thread deleted and JackDaniels applied to my bloodstream at once.
Thanks.

That's what all hot older women should do....drive around blowing guys to boost their confidence

I wish one of my buddies Mom's would've done that....

Great story...I guess you really can reflect on "the good ol' days"

 

[The Greatest]

here's a solid one.


The year was 1998 and I was pretty much playing the role of Auther Fonzerali. I was 21 years old going to community college driving a dope sports car picking up h.s. chicks. So I start dating one of the hottest cheerleaders in this particular High School. She had done some modeling for guess, 5'8 green eyes long blond hair a real jewish princess with money to boot.

So here we are into our second week of dating and I get the word from my mother (yes I was still living at home) that she will be out of town for the weekend. "Hot damn I thought this is great" so we end up back at my house and I am like an artist on this very prude 18 year old hotty. She was strickly against sex because I was not jewish but she loved to be eating out. So there we are on my twin size bed, the bed I had grown up on my whole life. All 5'8 of her sprawled out, legs in the air panties on the floor. Now I am going at it like a dog who hasn't eatin in days, my shirt is off and she is moaning in pleasure. I also carelessly left the door to my room open.

Like I jedi knight I sense a motion out of the corner of my eye. As I turn my worst fears begin to manafest, there is my mother watching me perform my majic on this young lady, a girl she had never met btw. As I turn in horror the young cheerleaders legs are still thrust in the air. My mom decides to go downstairs. The girl is mortified, I slowly walk the dance of shame and go downstairs. I see my mom fixing something to eat, "she asks me is was that her ass in the air?" clearly this is something I wished to never her from my mothers lips. I contuined to date this girl for 8 months but needless to say she and my mom never got along.

 

[hardrock]

here's a solid one.


The year was 1998 and I was pretty much playing the role of Auther Fonzerali. I was 21 years old going to community college driving a dope sports car picking up h.s. chicks. So I start dating one of the hottest cheerleaders in this particular High School. She had done some modeling for guess, 5'8 green eyes long blond hair a real jewish princess with money to boot.

So here we are into our second week of dating and I get the word from my mother (yes I was still living at home) that she will be out of town for the weekend. "Hot damn I thought this is great" so we end up back at my house and I am like an artist on this very prude 18 year old hotty. She was strickly against sex because I was not jewish but she loved to be eating out. So there we are on my twin size bed, the bed I had grown up on my whole life. All 5'8 of her sprawled out, legs in the air panties on the floor. Now I am going at it like a dog who hasn't eatin in days, my shirt is off and she is moaning in pleasure. I also carelessly left the door to my room open.

Like I jedi knight I sense a motion out of the corner of my eye. As I turn my worst fears begin to manafest, there is my mother watching me perform my majic on this young lady, a girl she had never met btw. As I turn in horror the young cheerleaders legs are still thrust in the air. My mom decides to go downstairs. The girl is mortified, I slowly walk the dance of shame and go downstairs. I see my mom fixing something to eat, "she asks me is was that her ass in the air?" clearly this is something I wished to never her from my mothers lips. I contuined to date this girl for 8 months but needless to say she and my mom never got along.

So how long till ya nailed her?

 

[The Greatest]

So how long till ya nailed her?

never got the opportunity. She remained a virgin until her best guy friend had sex with her the summer after her freshman year at the umass. Real douchbag but he worked the friends angle for a long time, plus he was jewish.

I actually recieved alot of flack from people, since she was sort of an "it" girl in a small town. After we broke up the first question was always "did you hit that shit". lol no.