Do any of you married people have outside lovers?

[solidspine]

How many of you married guys or women for that matter have somebody on the side.

I have been married three years, and my ex girl friend and I stay in touch, and sometimes a little more. I dated her 10 years prior to breaking it off and getting married.

I feel guilty because, I don’t feel guilty seeing her or being with her, even though I know it is wrong.

It is really a weird relationship; she is more maintenance then my wife, kids or anyone else I know.

Intellectually it is a no brainier, simply drop her and never see her again, but if she calls, I get sucked in, if she doesn’t call, well worst then her calling me, because I call her.

Plus she lives with some poor guy who has terminal cancer, I used to hate him now I feel sorry for him.

We just had a big fight, I could easily call the whole thing off for ever, or I could send flowers, very twisted.

Satan controls my soul

 

[immortalis]

First off, let me start by saying I have never cheated on my wife... or any girl for that matter. At the worst, I would hookup with someone while I was broke-up or on a break from a relationship however never flat out cheating. I was and have been almost 100% against it. My wife cheated on me when we dated in college, and I was never really the same after that.

She and I have been together off and on for 10 years, and have only recently been married. We got married on New Years Eve this past year. Ever since then, I have had the urge to stray. I dont know why... but its been getting more and more prevelant lately. I have even put myself in the position a few times recently where I have been very very tempted, and even in some cases I would have cheated on my wife recently however outside circumstances prevented it.

So I feel your pain in a way. I just dont have an outside lover as of "yet"... I cant seem to track down any of these EF girls that might live nearbye!

 

[needtogetaas]

How many of you married guys or women for that matter have somebody on the side.

I have been married three years, and my ex girl friend and I stay in touch, and sometimes a little more. I dated her 10 years prior to breaking it off and getting married.

I feel guilty because, I don’t feel guilty seeing her or being with her, even though I know it is wrong.

It is really a weird relationship; she is more maintenance then my wife, kids or anyone else I know.

Intellectually it is a no brainier, simply drop her and never see her again, but if she calls, I get sucked in, if she doesn’t call, well worst then her calling me, because I call her.

Plus she lives with some poor guy who has terminal cancer, I used to hate him now I feel sorry for him.

We just had a big fight, I could easily call the whole thing off for ever, or I could send flowers, very twisted.

Satan controls my soul

you shoulkd be fucken shot in the head.

 

[Devastation]

if i had anyone on the side my gf would know about her, because i'd tell her before it happened

deception is the cruelest. honesty and communication are key to making a valued relationship work

 

[Sassy69]

First off, let me start by saying I have never cheated on my wife... or any girl for that matter. At the worst, I would hookup with someone while I was broke-up or on a break from a relationship however never flat out cheating. I was and have been almost 100% against it. My wife cheated on me when we dated in college, and I was never really the same after that.

She and I have been together off and on for 10 years, and have only recently been married. We got married on New Years Eve this past year. Ever since then, I have had the urge to stray. I dont know why... but its been getting more and more prevelant lately. I have even put myself in the position a few times recently where I have been very very tempted, and even in some cases I would have cheated on my wife recently however outside circumstances prevented it.

So I feel your pain in a way. I just dont have an outside lover as of "yet"... I cant seem to track down any of these EF girls that might live nearbye!

Just curious - why do you think you have these urges even though you aren't even married a year?

 

[solidspine]

you shoulkd be fucken shot in the head.


I was but with surgery at USC I recovered.

From about 12 yards by one of LA’s finest, 357 magnum lodged in the cerebral. Cortexes. He though my cell phone was a handgun,

anyway it was a case of mistaken identity, they had the right guy in custody,
5’9” shaved head, tattoos, Hispanic, gang banger, etc....

I was 40 he was 20 I am 5’5”, no tattoos and super blond hair, blue eyes. Go figure.

Just curious - why do you think you have these urges even though you aren't even married a year?

Excellent question, and I need to answer it honestly and hopefully get this resolved permanently





It is very twisted, my urges are only with or for her. I have no desire to cheat on my wife, and certainly maintain reasonable relationships with all other women out of both respect and desire. Plus this sounds crazy I love my wife.

My wife is 18 years younger than this woman, much prettier not that should be relevant, completely much more compatible in every regard, and a completely different person. Very positive, happy and a shear joy to be with.

I am seeing a shrink, I think I need to be more honest with her (the shrink)

 

[immortalis]

Just curious - why do you think you have these urges even though you aren't even married a year?

Thats a good question Sassy... and I dont think I know the answer to it. I think that somewhere deep down, it may be my mind's way of telling me that things arent going to get better... that there is no light at the end of the tunnel in regards to this marriage. But I really dont want to admit "defeat".

 

[mkazzbmf]

Thats why all women should be on their mans dick at least once a day to prevent them from having the urge to cheat. So ladies......PUT OUT!


Kaz

 

[Cutiebaby]

Why not just get a Divorce? No point in wasting a womans time while you are out sleeping around on the sly! Sickening the lengths that people will go to!
Obviously there is nothing in the marriage as far as lust or desire.
Maybe you should research what marriage really means! You agreed to become one, not to go and date or "see" other girls at your leisure. I am sure you know all this and must be having doubts or some thing along the lines or you would not have made this thread. However, there is no excuse. No justification as to what you are doing. Do you ever stop and think about your wife? How would she feel, what will she say or do.
Surely I hope that there are no children involved that will be caught in the damned cross fire!