update:
I got the job and I came home and after talking with my husband I turned it down. We came to the conclusion that if I was going to put the job into a hat for the possibility of pulling it out, I wouldn't put it in a hat. wasn't a passion for me, it would of been a paycheck and not a very good one to be putting the kids in daycare for.
I am sooo lucky I can be choosy, my hubby is one heck of a man great person, father and husband.
My thoughts are getting clearer and like I tell everybody I am going to write down everything I want to do and weigh the pros and cons of it all (not on here though

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