You better come on into my kitchen...

[Werd]

Thanx Chef!

Yes, my man is a smoker. But he smokes a brand that does not leave a taste on his lips or mouth, smell on his skin or clothing AT ALL... or he would have never become my man.

You should hear us.

Me: "I thought you said you would quit."

Him: "I'm gonna die someday, aren't I?"

HEhehehehhehehheee

The cigs he smokes are quite expensive so if I told him of this cigar-fantasy fettish of mine I don't think he would care about cost. He has already told me that he would indulge me in ANY fantasy. (One is quite odd. LOL)

Your post is soooooooooooooooo sexy. I will definitely cut and paste in an email!! God he will have SUCH a stiffy!! hehehehehehhee


*devlish grin*

God, how I LUV to tease him!

 

[ChefWide]

No worries, werd.

If you can eat it, smoke it, or drink it, I might be of some assistance.

 

[ChefWide]

not one comment from you cigar heads. I am ashamed.

 

[strongsmartsexy]

2.5 hour ride this morning, so I have to wait until a little later to truely appreciate how much I wanted to raunch out this answer, but, silly me, decided to actually answer it... funny what hill training and a few U'turns under the sheets will do to a guy...



Part one: does your man smoke? This is important, if only for the reason that he/somebody else should light your first cigar for you and smoke, gently, the first inch or so of it for you to mellow the smoke and cool it down. The lighting and first inch or so can be very harsh and hot for a 'gar virgin and usually is the part of the experience that turns them away for life.

Next, this will sound OBVIOUS and STOOPID, but DO NOT INHALE. I know that you know this but I have said this right to the face of someone while handing them a 'gar, and guess what? they fucking inhale, turn green, vomit or die. Well, almost. So I know how hard this will be for you, it pains me to say this to a woman, let me tell you, but here goes: please suck gently but do NOT swallow. Ok?

Your first cigar: you get 10 puffs. Thats it. Any more and you will get nic' rushes from hell and probably get a 'gar hangover. No good. So let your first gar be a tease, you might love it, you might hate it, but don't overdo it the first time or you won't come back.

SO: let your man light it and smoke the first inch or so to mellow it, then you puff puff, but only 10 good puffs, slow and easy, that could take you a good five minutes, then you hand it back to your man who will finish the lovely 'gar whilest you put your now fully reved-up sucking reflex to good work elsewhere.

I suggest a Macanudo Maduro. Dark, lucious, chocolately, very mild, a good quality smoke without breaking the bank, pretty easy to find at a good tobaconist... and NOT one of those piece of shit 'sweet' cigars that the trailer crowd smokes with their sister/cousin/lover.

Part Two: Now, if you must go cuban, go Montechristo #2. My sister gave me a box of these, my very favorite cigars EVER, from london three weeks ago with a 1974 bottle of Speyside Malt from McCallan, WOW. My first night in the new house has both on the agenda. Some folks will say 'Cohiba, Cohiba!', which I like and collect as well, but Montechristo's are the mother ship, and the torpoedos (#2's) are the best non vintage cigar in the world, period (he says, knowing full well that it is TOTALLY a matter of opinion and that one mans cigar is another mans stable sweepings). So, if you need an 'either this or that' opinion, I can help with that too, but this should help a bit, I hope.

I am going to print this up and FRAME it! Well done!

 

[PHATchik]

I know this will sound strange, but I have always wanted to smoke a cigar.... just once, just to say I did.

I DETEST smoking. Never have been a smoker, think that shit is nasty unless it is weed.

But there is just something seductive about a cigar.

What would you suggest for a virgin like m'self, Chef?

Oh they are great. I had my first one on Valentine's Day. It was fantastic. I even talked to people while I had it.

Then I got a Cuban in the Bahamas. It was damn expensive, but it was well worth it.

 

[ChefWide]

Oh they are great. I had my first one on Valentine's Day. It was fantastic. I even talked to people while I had it.

Then I got a Cuban in the Bahamas. It was damn expensive, but it was well worth it.

You can never get them back onto the farm once they've seen Pareeeeee!

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

75 and sunny, light breezes, not a cloud in site, kids running playing tag, grill blazed, big ol burgers, grown ups on the grass: cheffy playin' slide - my bro on the harp, tossing out a little "You better come on into my kitchen"... just came in to check mail, get beers and a cigar cutter... I'll have one for you.

Wow, that's a relaxing, puts a warm image in your head that makes you wanna zone out and smile post. Really cool.....really cool!

LOL@ writing the chords out.

 

[Werd]

We are going to an affair this weekend.... I'll cut and paste this stuff into an email to him today.

We'll see what happens.

 

[V-Machine]

I DETEST smoking. Never have been a smoker, think that shit is nasty unless it is weed.

QUOTE]

Better hope that your kids dont pick up that attitude.......

Mom: What do you mean you were smokin'? What have I told you about that.......
Poor confused kid: But mom u dont understand......
Mom: That shit can kill you goddamit.......and it makes you stink........
Poor confused kid: But mom it was only weed.........
Mom: Oh well thats ok then. It might be illegal and all but at least it doesnt make you smell. Just stay away fromt hat nasty tobacco ok?

 

[Werd]

I DETEST smoking. Never have been a smoker, think that shit is nasty unless it is weed.

QUOTE]

Better hope that your kids dont pick up that attitude.......

Mom: What do you mean you were smokin'? What have I told you about that.......
Poor confused kid: But mom u dont understand......
Mom: That shit can kill you goddamit.......and it makes you stink........
Poor confused kid: But mom it was only weed.........
Mom: Oh well thats ok then. It might be illegal and all but at least it doesnt make you smell. Just stay away fromt hat nasty tobacco ok?

Ummmm the last time I checked I had control over what my kids read. Dont you supervise your young children's time on the net? They do not have a clue what I post here in this ADULT FORUM WHERE ILLEGAL STEROIDS ARE TALKED ABOUT FREELY.

Please pull your self-righteous head out of your ass. It is quite unbecoming already.