No sex....some advice please

[musclemom]

My husband is also secure enough to be married to a woman like me, and it takes ONE hell of a man to be married to a high rollin' bitch like me, hon, I don't take shit from nobody, I think you know that by now.

This says it all......[/QUOTE]
"You must spread some Karma around before giving it to Gymgurl again."

 

[uniden44]

I don't ever yell or get angry when I bring it up b/c I know thats not the way to go about it. I don't think shes mad at me for anything b/c everything else in are relationship is fine. If shes with holding sex for that long for something small that shes upset about but won't tell me then I don't know what to do.

She knows that I'm concerned about it but she doesn't seem to worried. I don't think she would be concerned enough to go to the doctors. I do everything for this girl, I treat her great. She's even brought up the marriage thing (which if we can't communicate then were in no way ready for).

I agree that the closeness of sex is part of love and a relationship but the more time that passes it just strains the relationship for me. At what point do I say enough is enough? I don't want her to have sex with me if she doesn't want to (obviously) and if she does have someone else, which I don't think she does, then she can have him. I enjoy being in a relationship but I feel like I'm missing out on part of it. Thanks all keep u posted

 

[musclemom]

I don't ever yell or get angry when I bring it up b/c I know thats not the way to go about it. I don't think shes mad at me for anything b/c everything else in are relationship is fine. If shes with holding sex for that long for something small that shes upset about but won't tell me then I don't know what to do.

She knows that I'm concerned about it but she doesn't seem to worried. I don't think she would be concerned enough to go to the doctors. I do everything for this girl, I treat her great. She's even brought up the marriage thing (which if we can't communicate then were in no way ready for).

I agree that the closeness of sex is part of love and a relationship but the more time that passes it just strains the relationship for me. At what point do I say enough is enough? I don't want her to have sex with me if she doesn't want to (obviously) and if she does have someone else, which I don't think she does, then she can have him. I enjoy being in a relationship but I feel like I'm missing out on part of it. Thanks all keep u posted

Dr. Phil said, that hack, did make a very astute observation, "Sex, when it's working and good in the relationship, makes up LESS than 10% of what goes into a good relationship ... when it is bad, it takes over 80%."

If you guys are under 30, don't have any kids or extreme stressors including health, work, financial or travel problems, and you haven't had ANY sex in more than two months, you guys have a problem.

If she's not harboring some resentment towards you (and assuming you have sweet breath, no BO, and no outrageous offensive personal habits, etc.), and she gets angry if you bring up doctor or counseling, then you sit her down in front of the computer and make her read this entire thread. She needs to communicate with you WTF is going on.

A sexless relationship is not workable if you both aren't into it, seriously.

 

[BigRupe]

Hey thats what I did!! She actually said yes...lol
i think she just wanted to wea the 30K$ ring for a few days...i heard later from a couple of the guys she was fucking that she would wear the ring and laugh her as off about how pathetic i was while she was jerking them off and sucking thier cocks with the hand her ring was on(ya, she was a lefty)

You're a better man than me to be able to joke about it. I'd probably be in Cell Block D if my GF did something like that to me. LOL

 

[dullboy]

dullboy is loathe to agree with the cynics because you actually seem to care for this girl, but barring the recent use of anti-depressants, a sudden lack of interest in sex and passive aggresive behavior is an indicator of unfaithfullness. this actually supports musclemoms anecdotal experience. although she may not have cheated when she was unhappy in an existing relationship, most women will.

ergo, if you read the many posts dullboy has made concerning these sorts of matters, you'll understand that girls generally won't cheat unless they're unhappy or unfufilled an existing relationship.



dullboy has extensive clinical experience doing csw type stuff, which is why he chose to change professions. dullboy gets sad hearing about other peoples relationship issues.

 

[Wulfgar]

dullboy is loathe to agree with the cynics because you actually seem to care for this girl, but barring the recent use of anti-depressants, a sudden lack of interest in sex and passive aggresive behavior is an indicator of unfaithfullness. this actually supports musclemoms anecdotal experience. although she may not have cheated when she was unhappy in an existing relationship, most women will.

ergo, if you read the many posts dullboy has made concerning these sorts of matters, you'll understand that girls generally won't cheat unless they're unhappy or unfufilled an existing relationship.



dullboy has extensive clinical experience doing csw type stuff, which is why he chose to change professions because dullboy gets sad hearing about other peoples relationship issues.

Wulfgar thinks his own life dramas would be more than enough. Wulfgar couldnt imagine having to deal with others relationship issues as well.

 

[Wulfgar]

You're a better man than me to be able to joke about it. I'd probably be in Cell Block D if my GF did something like that to me. LOL

Well man, I just had to ask myself before I went to exact "revenge" th question "what am I fighting for?"
pride? revenge? a righteous fury? Indignation? Hatred? Intolerance? Unforgiveness?
All traits I am willing to sacrifice in life. Those arnt necissarily empowering aspects of self. Yet so many people cling to those very traits they hate in others the most.

 

[dullboy]

Well man, I just had to ask myself before I went to exact "revenge" th question "what am I fighting for?"
pride? revenge? a righteous fury? Indignation? Hatred? Intolerance? Unforgiveness?
All traits I am willing to sacrifice in life. Those arnt necissarily empowering aspects of self. Yet so many people cling to those very traits they hate in others the most.

dullboy is always stunned by how open you are about past relationship "issues". most guys resist being so frank. dullboy respects you the nth degree for your forthrightness.

dullboy is a little older than you and would just like say that most women are suprisingly loyal to men. you seem to have had some bad experiences, but these situations tend to be more controlled by you than your sig other.

meaning that if you treat a girl "right", the odds are greatly in your favor that she'll remain loyal. treating a woman "right" doen't equal weakness. it just means being a good guy.

the issue that you need to be careful about is preemption. meaning that if you always conclude that a girl will cheat on you (based on past experience), you may take on self fufilling behavior that enables the girl to justify being unfaithfull to you.

 

[BigRupe]

It's reverse for men...when men are pissed sex is a unique way to administer a little bit of discipline with some rather hard thrusting to get the point across.

Gentlemen, lemme let you in on a little secret. The FASTEST sex drive killer on the planet:

She's PISSED at you.

Might be something REALLY small, but it's something she's brought up to you, probably time and time again, you won't do a damn thing about it, keep forgetting that she's mentioned it, maybe don't even hear her saying it to you.

And for all y'all that think women can't live without getting laid, gents, hate to break it to you, but women can self service, too

AND BY THE FREAKING WAY ... just because we don't WANT to fuck you doesn't mean we would RATHER be fucking someone else ... it COULD mean we just DON'T want to fuck you!!! We are not men. If we're not in the mood, it's not because we're satiated, it's because WE DON'T WANNA.

Oh, and here's a little secret about women -- if we're cheating on you, we have been known to suddenly START fucking you a lot to throw you off the trail

 

[BigRupe]

Well man, I just had to ask myself before I went to exact "revenge" th question "what am I fighting for?"
pride? revenge? a righteous fury? Indignation? Hatred? Intolerance? Unforgiveness?
All traits I am willing to sacrifice in life. Those arnt necissarily empowering aspects of self. Yet so many people cling to those very traits they hate in others the most.

You have an excellent point. What would you, me, or anyone actually be fighting for? The person won't change and fuck if they can't see the worth of you and do that sort of shit then hell it's their loss.

Great comments Wulfgar!