Married with Children? You're amongst the elite in America.

[redsamurai]

I'm going to agree that "optimally".....it is probably best that a child be raised by two mentally stable parents, a man and woman......but life ain't "optimal". And if longhorn would jog down out of that Ivory tower every now and then he might get a glimpse of that. Nobody "wants" to be a single parent......but it happens, people fuck each other over.....whaddya gonna do?? Should you get yourself into a long term commitment with someone who is emotionally and/or physically abusive because it's best for the overall societal structure of "family"??? go jump off a high bridge.......I think I"ve figured ole boy out though.......someone in his past left his ass out on the curb, this stung his massive bloated ego.......how could anyone leave "ME"?? And this is his bitterness showing towards the "individual" making choices that are best for them.......and not playing their role like they're "supposed to"....

 

[heatherrae]

Redsamurai, I always tend to agree with you, and I am no different in that post.

Of course, if we would have had a happy, loving relationship I would not have left, but life didn't deal me those cards on this occassion. Even if we had already been married, I still would have had to leave him so marriage in this case would have ended in divorce anyway.

Would I PREFER having a baby with a man who was loving and kind? Of course I would, but shit happened, proverbialy speaking, that made it in the best interests of everyone for that engagement to be ended. ;-)

 

[redsamurai]

Redsamurai, I always tend to agree with you, and I am no different in that post.

Of course, if we would have had a happy, loving relationship I would not have left, but life didn't deal me those cards on this occassion. Even if we had already been married, I still would have had to leave him so marriage in this case would have ended in divorce anyway.

Would I PREFER having a baby with a man who was loving and kind? Of course I would, but shit happened, proverbialy speaking, that made it in the best interests of everyone for that engagement to be ended. ;-)

Yep.....that's life. What amazes me is that I think Longjohn really thinks you just up and one day decided you wanted to be a single mom........when in reality it was probably the most or one of the most painful decisions and period of your life. People like him continue to amaze me to no end.

 

[EnderJE]

So, are we friends now or is blood going to be spilled?

 

[EnderJE]

This is one of those threads where you think to yourself, "I just didn't see it turning out this way."

Not to the degree that it has. I was hoping that would could discuss it rationally without attacks on both sides.

I do understand why one may take it more personally then the other, but then again the hope is that we can give our points and agree to disagree.

Now, global warming....

 

[mrplunkey]

Marriage is a great vehicle to pool resources and to raise a family.

Now that its easier and more acceptable to divorce (or never marry in the first place), marriage is on the decline.

Less-educated and lower-income people get hit harder when they lose the financial and functional benefits of marriage because they have less financial freedom.

Those things are obvious to me.

The thing I find interesting is how people don't "mate down" as often as they used to. Now, well-educated professional people seek-out other well-educated professional people. You don't marry the prettiest girl in the neighborhood anymore -- instead you marry the girl you meet at college. I wonder what 3-5 generations of this will look like, because it seems like we could be looking at a "superclass" of hyper-educated, high-income earners fairly soon.

 

[javaguru]

Just so my post doesn't get lost in the "page over."

I found this interesting,

http://www.religioustolerance.org/chr_dira.htm

Variation in divorce rates by religion:
Religion % have been divorced
Jews 30%
Born-again Christians 27%
Other Christians 24%
Atheists, Agnostics 21%


"Barna's results verified findings of earlier polls: that conservative Protestant Christians, on average, have the highest divorce rate, while mainline Christians have a much lower rate. They found some new information as well: that atheists and agnostics have the lowest divorce rate of all. George Barna commented that the results raise "questions regarding the effectiveness of how churches minister to families.' The data challenge "the idea that churches provide truly practical and life-changing support for marriage.'"

Donald Hughes, author of The Divorce Reality, said:

"In the churches, people have a superstitious view that Christianity will keep them from divorce, but they are subject to the same problems as everyone else, and they include a lack of relationship skills. ...Just being born again is not a rabbit's foot."

Hughes claim that 90% of divorces among born-again couples occur after they have been "saved."

Ron Barrier, Spokespersonn for American Atheists remarked on these findings with some rather caustic comments against organized religion. He said:

"These findings confirm what I have been saying these last five years. Since Atheist ethics are of a higher caliber than religious morals, it stands to reason that our families would be dedicated more to each other than to some invisible monitor in the sky. With Atheism, women and men are equally responsible for a healthy marriage. There is no room in Atheist ethics for the type of 'submissive' nonsense preached by Baptists and other Christian and/or Jewish groups. Atheists reject, and rightly so, the primitive patriarchal attitudes so prevalent in many religions with respect to marriage."

 

[-SD-]

http://i84.photobucket.com/albums/k5/superdave1010101993/birthcontrtol.jpg

 

[redsamurai]

The thing I find interesting is how people don't "mate down" as often as they used to. Now, well-educated professional people seek-out other well-educated professional people. You don't marry the prettiest girl in the neighborhood anymore -- instead you marry the girl you meet at college. I wonder what 3-5 generations of this will look like, because it seems like we could be looking at a "superclass" of hyper-educated, high-income earners fairly soon.

I hope you find this a "good" thing.....right??

 

[mrplunkey]

I hope you find this a "good" thing.....right??

Its good and dangerous at the same time. Generation upon generation of highly-educated, highly-intelligent, well-to-do kids is a good thing. But we also have generation upon generation of institutionalized, under-educated, drug-engrossed, poor kids as well.

Now here's the rub. Capitalism, the best and most proven system in the world, is based on competition. So we have one class emerging that is uniquely positioned to compete and another class emerging that is wholey and inadequately equipped to compete. The risk of our society bifercating and having no middle class is great.