Dream Wrestling Matches

[Big Brother Val]

LOL!!! Throw in Barry Horowitz for a triple threat match!

I've told you 1,000 times, Nature Boy... Iron Mike Sharpe would decimate Barry Horrowitz.

Let's think about Iron Mike for a second:

1. Mike Tyson stole his nickname
2. He wore black
3. He had a David Hasselhoff haircut from the "Night Rider" series.
4. His chest was hairy.
5. He had a black armband that fit a lump of tape -I mean- IRON.
6. His move arsenal was INSANE... he knew a scoop slam AND a knee drop. Along with an occasional punch... even a stomp or two. Need I say any more?
7. He had almost as much personality as one of the ring posts.


I'm sorry, Nature Boy... Barry had those suspenders... he patted himself on the back... and looked like Robin Williams... but did you ever see him to an incredibly shitty scoop slam? Where was his chest hair?

 

[the nature boy]

I've told you 1,000 times, Nature Boy... Iron Mike Sharpe would decimate Barry Horrowitz.

Let's think about Iron Mike for a second:

1. Mike Tyson stole his nickname
2. He wore black
3. He had a David Hasselhoff haircut from the "Night Rider" series.
4. His chest was hairy.
5. He had a black armband that fit a lump of tape -I mean- IRON.
6. His move arsenal was INSANE... he knew a scoop slam AND a knee drop. Along with an occasional punch... even a stomp or two. Need I say any more?
7. He had almost as much personality as one of the ring posts.


I'm sorry, Nature Boy... Barry had those suspenders... he patted himself on the back... and looked like Robin Williams... but did you ever see him to an incredibly shitty scoop slam? Where was his chest hair?

bwaaahahahahahahha. Val, the comedic wrestling subject matter expert.

Hey we need a dream hispanic match? Could it be Tito Santana (aka Chiko Santana according to Jessie Ventura) vs every single Luchador? Not including Silver King or some shit.

 

[Big Brother Val]

bwaaahahahahahahha. Val, the comedic wrestling subject matter expert.

Hey we need a dream hispanic match? Could it be Tito Santana (aka Chiko Santana according to Jessie Ventura) vs every single Luchador? Not including Silver King or some shit.

I think Tito Santana could go against El Gigante... in a Jose vs. Golias match. (that's spanish for Goliath... DAMN I'M SMART)

Or Tito Santana vs. Super Calo... that dumbass in the WCW who looked like he had a pumpkin on his head.

Why not keep Silver King in there?

If you want the shittiest hispanic match of all time though... you gotta say:

Rocko Rock (from Public Enemy) vs. Tito vs. Konan in a Triple Threat. Konan has got to be one of the most worthless wrestlers of all time. In that match, not only would you be watching a match performed in slow motion, but you'd get like 7 moves in there, and none of them would bump correctly.

 

[Latimer]

Trip vs. Steiner
The Outsiders vs. The Brothers of Destruction
Sabu vs. Jeff Hardy in a hardcore or tlc match
Test vs. Deca in a 2thick/E2 thread.

What if they had a wrestler named Deca? Would he combine with Test to make a powerful tag-team?

 

[the nature boy]

I think Tito Santana could go against El Gigante... in a Jose vs. Golias match. (that's spanish for Goliath... DAMN I'M SMART)

Or Tito Santana vs. Super Calo... that dumbass in the WCW who looked like he had a pumpkin on his head.

Why not keep Silver King in there?

If you want the shittiest hispanic match of all time though... you gotta say:

Rocko Rock (from Public Enemy) vs. Tito vs. Konan in a Triple Threat. Konan has got to be one of the most worthless wrestlers of all time. In that match, not only would you be watching a match performed in slow motion, but you'd get like 7 moves in there, and none of them would bump correctly.

WTF was up with silver king? all he did was wear some stupid stetson hat! not a whole lot of thought put into that name.

Who was the overweight luchador that was known as the Chairman of the Board? He wore a totally stupid costume that looked like a skelaton.

Eddie Guerro is prolly my favorite hispanic wrestler, however I hated the whole Chyna thing.

P.S. My man Bobby Heenan called Tito Santana's finishing move the "Flying Burrito."

Trivia, what did Tito Santana say at the end of every lame interview?????? Anyone??

 

[Dogballs]

goldberg vs stonecold

 

[Big Brother Val]

WTF was up with silver king? all he did was wear some stupid stetson hat! not a whole lot of thought put into that name.

Who was the overweight luchador that was known as the Chairman of the Board? He wore a totally stupid costume that looked like a skelaton.

Eddie Guerro is prolly my favorite hispanic wrestler, however I hated the whole Chyna thing.

P.S. My man Bobby Heenan called Tito Santana's finishing move the "Flying Burrito."

Trivia, what did Tito Santana say at the end of every lame interview?????? Anyone??

FLYING BURRITO!!! HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAA!!!!

I remember that. Now that shows you what type of talent you had to have to wrestle back then. Good hell... a flying forearm?

The luchador you ask of was La Parka... that guy had the body of my 8th grade shop teacher.

I believe the answer to your trivia question was "Areeba!" Or however the hell it's spelled. Basically what "Speedy Gonzalez" the super fast mouse on Bugs Bunny cartoons said.

Here's another trivia along the same lines:

Who was the poor bastard that had to tag team with Tito, and what was their tag team name?

 

[the nature boy]

FLYING BURRITO!!! HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAA!!!!

I remember that. Now that shows you what type of talent you had to have to wrestle back then. Good hell... a flying forearm?

The luchador you ask of was La Parka... that guy had the body of my 8th grade shop teacher.

I believe the answer to your trivia question was "Areeba!" Or however the hell it's spelled. Basically what "Speedy Gonzalez" the super fast mouse on Bugs Bunny cartoons said.

Here's another trivia along the same lines:

Who was the poor bastard that had to tag team with Tito, and what was their tag team name?

probably one of the worst tag teams ever... Strike Force, with Rick Martel, pre Model persona.

 

[the nature boy]

P.S. here's a question I don't know. Has anyone else used the flying forearm as a finisher? Or at least a setup move?

 

[Big Brother Val]

Actually, another talentless loser, but this time, with a fabulous physique Lex Luger used the forearm bit... usually to set up the "Torture Rack". Remember how he had the steel plate in his forearm, so he'd sometimes jump with it, sometimes just run into someone with it.

Booker T does a jumping forearm shot... Jericho does on occassion.

It's okay as a filler move, I think... but to finish someone off... come on....

Jimmy Snuka was actually using that in low profile matches for a while... for smaller crowds and stuff. He did that for his finisher in a show he did here.


Do you remember what wrestler did the first "Pedigree"? It was a version of it... he held them in the same position, but did double underhook the arms...