PSA: If we have a fight and you don't get laid for a week or more....

[ctrl_freak]

If you care and respect the other person you will be able to sit down and talk it out without yelling.
If you or your partner have to fight it out or yell there is a greater problem inside of both of you that needs to be addressed...

Problem also comes in when both partners are headstrong and stubborn as hell. Then what?

 

[slat1]

there's no way I'm hopping in the sack with someone if I'm pissed/hurt with them. Thanks, but I'll take the couch.

You shouldn't have to sleep on the couch. You should be able to explain how what happened made you feel. Your partner should take the time to understand. It should be a moment where you grow even closer. You are baring your soul to each other. Understanding the inner workings.
If you are still pissed you are not communicating with you S/O... or.. they are not communicating with you.
The reality is that if you both took the time to understand each other and what happened... this could lead to an incredible session of sex that brings you closer.
I will never be with someone who can physically or emotionally detach themselves from me. If they can I am with the wrong person and I am out of there. I would rather be with someone who is secure and understands that there are miscommunications at times. Someone who realizes I love them and I did not mean to hurt them. Someone who will take the time to talk to me so I understand exactly how they feel so that I would never do what I did again. Thats love... thats a relationship!

 

[Deterass]

No way could i stay married to a bitch .

 

[TC2]

Agreed.

That is your partner not a child. Taking a toy away from a child - fine. Withholding sex from your partner (which in my opinion is not a tool or game or some sort of reward) - immature.

I will also add another thought - behavior like this will possibly cause him to start looking someplace else to get the loving he isn't getting at home.

Word..Only times I have ever cheated was when a gf pulled that withholding for punishment bullshit.



I understand if a man just does some fucked shit and the girl is really pissed at him, but withholding sex simply because you did not get your way is childish as hell and you deserve what you get.

 

[Deterass]

My condolences go out to your husband in that case.

ditto......

 

[habitualhealth]

You shouldn't have to sleep on the couch. You should be able to explain how what happened made you feel. Your partner should take the time to understand. It should be a moment where you grow even closer. You are baring your soul to each other. Understanding the inner workings.
If you are still pissed you are not communicating with you S/O... or.. they are not communicating with you.
The reality is that if you both took the time to understand each other and what happened... this could lead to an incredible session of sex that brings you closer.
I will never be with someone who can physically or emotionally detach themselves from me. If they can I am with the wrong person and I am out of there. I would rather be with someone who is secure and understands that there are miscommunications at times. Someone who realizes I love them and I did not mean to hurt them. Someone who will take the time to talk to me so I understand exactly how they feel so that I would never do what I did again. Thats love... thats a relationship!

This is a great post slat. But the first paragraph is filled with "should". You're right, you and your partner "should" do alot of things to make it work. It "should" work where BOTH people care enough about the situation to identify it immediately and bend over backward to make the changes necessary to bring happiness and peace back to the relationship. (so they can't wait to get in there and make whoopie) Coulda shoulda woulda's are a prob for me in any relationship. I see black and white. No gray area. If gray tries to make a presence I immediately try to break it down to it's natural state. (black and white) I don't think there's anything that makes my blood boil more than an indirectness. Just as in a career, as a parent, with friends....if there's a problem you address it immediately and work together to make sure it never resurfaces. (imo) Takes two to tango.

But I agree with aandd and nycgirl...maturity is so important for a healthy relationship.

 

[habitualhealth]

Word..Only times I have ever cheated was when a gf pulled that withholding for punishment bullshit.

So is it ok for a girl to go out and cheat so to speak if a guy is doing nothing to address/correct is mistakes and wrongdoings?

I understand if a man just does some fucked shit and the girl is really pissed at him, but withholding sex simply because you did not get your way is childish as hell and you deserve what you get.

I promote taking away dinner/sportscenter before taking away sex. (for punishment) lol

 

[TC2]

So is it ok for a girl to go out and cheat so to speak if a guy is doing nothing to address/correct is mistakes and wrongdoings?

I promote taking away dinner/sportscenter before taking away sex. (for punishment) lol

Depends(it might sound sexist but it's not) alot of the time women expect men to be mind readers(suprise..we're not!!).

If a man is withholding sex(yeah right) then yes, a woman should get it elsewhere.

 

[habitualhealth]

Problem also comes in when both partners are headstrong and stubborn as hell. Then what?

Sounds like an excuse to let things go unaddressed. Some of my best friends in the world are stubborn as hell and headstrong. To be honest, I typically don't work well with weakminded individuals...so, it's to be expected that we won't see eye to eye on everything. But as slat said, there's an understood respect, if warranted, that we care/love each other enough (my friends & i) that we want to understand each other better and really see where each person is coming from. It's not a battle of who's right and wrong...often times we call each other morons and just agree to disagree. That's ok too. But at least it's out in the open and we all know what the other feels.

On another hand, if I've done something to hurt/wrong one of them...I will go above and beyond the call of duty to make it right and to make sure they know i will NEVER do it again. Fact is, it kills me if I know I've done something to hurt someone I care about/love. Happy faces is what makes me happy.

 

[KillahBee]

PSA - (and this was probably said already) - we are cheating on you. with our secretary, with the stripper we met on that "business trip", and with your best friend.