Married with Children? You're amongst the elite in America.

[Longhorn85]

I'm not the only one who was offended by what you said. I'm just the most vocal.

As I am not the only one who recognizes you for what you are: an overly emotional, irrational woman who has made bad choices in life.

The only reason you resent this thread about marriage is because it makes you realize how screwed up your own situation is.

 

[heatherrae]

As I am not the only one who recognizes you for what you are: an overly emotional, irrational woman who has made bad choices in life.

The only reason you resent this thread about marriage is because it makes you realize how screwed up your own situation is.

I don't consider my own situation "screwed up." You are the one placing that value choice on it. I consider my upcoming child a blessing, even though I know I will have to protect her from hearing hateful people such as you tell her how our little family isn't good enough because it isn't just like yours.

Bad choices? ROFL. I went from poverty, to college and law school and a six figure income all from the sweat of my brow. I'm infinitely proud of the decisions I have made in my life, including my child.

How about your bad choices, Longhorn? Since you want to throw stones again about bad choices, was your adultery a good choice?

 

[Bikini Mod]

I fully understand the discourse, emotion and all as I have feelings for both sides, believe it or not.

Longhorne I have tremendous respect for you because you were smart enough to choose an excellent wife and even better mother to your children. There aren't many men like you out there who willingly admit that there wife is next to God in their eyes, especially given some of your admitted shortcomings. (Which WE ALL have.)

Having said that I have to say that I do not understand why a man as intelligent as you would feel the need to chastise other women who have not yet found a man such as yourself. You know, one that willingly admits and treats his woman with all the respect and reverence that she deserves.

Maybe you were using a sort of reverse psychology telling women such as Heatherrae that she IS a woman amongst women and that she shouldn't continue to sell herself short by wasting her time and affection on a man that is not as GOOD as you....?

She knows her fiancee was less than stellar and it took A LOT of balls for her to up and leave. Not many woman would have had the strength to do so. Goodness knows it took me a beatdown to recognize just how low I was setting the bar for myself AND my children.

But look how well I turned out. You have no idea the hell my family has and IS going through, but in the end it will all have been worth it as my children are learning how to persevere and stay strong in light of THE MOST DIFFICULT circumstances! They learned that FROM ME... period.

I have a tremendous amount of respect for both of you and this thread has saddened me. Not because of all the points of view that have come to light, but because of the personal attacks that came along with them.

Longhorne I think I understand what YOU were trying to say, but the manner with which you delivered your message caused its effectiveness to be lost and mired in hate. Somehow I dont think that was what you had in mind when you began this thread.... was it?

 

[heatherrae]

He has hardly masked his hatred of single moms in this thread. I have NO respect for him anymore, BM. How hypocritical is it for a man to throw stones at other people for being the breakdown of marraige when they have committed adultery? How hypocritical is it for them to then give marraige advice and tell you to go find a man as good as them?

I'm nto saying that mistakes in marraige make someone a terrible person. What I am saying is that people who have made those mistakes really shouldn't be pointing fingers at other for the breakdown of marraige. The hypocrisy and hatred make them terrible.

 

[Longhorn85]

Longhorne I think I understand what YOU were trying to say, but the manner with which you delivered your message caused its effectiveness to be lost and mired in hate. Somehow I dont think that was what you had in mind when you began this thread.... was it?

As I often do, I posted up a newsworthy article and stated my opinion while soliticing the opinion of others. There was nothing personal about it. One of the first responses was from HR, who immediately took it as a personal attack, and began to attack me personally, actually slanderous in nature because she knows nothing about my marriage.

Eventually, I responded in kind.

 

[Bikini Mod]

He has hardly masked his hatred of single moms in this thread. I have NO respect for him anymore, BM. How hypocritical is it for a man to throw stones at other people for being the breakdown of marraige when they have committed adultery? How hypocritical is it for them to then give marraige advice and tell you to go find a man as good as them?

I'm nto saying that mistakes in marraige make someone a terrible person. What I am saying is that people who have made those mistakes really shouldn't be pointing fingers at other for the breakdown of marraige. The hypocrisy and hatred make them terrible.

As I often do, I posted up a newsworthy article and stated my opinion while soliticing the opinion of others. There was nothing personal about it. One of the first responses was from HR, who immediately took it as a personal attack, and began to attack me personally, actually slanderous in nature because she knows nothing about my marriage.

Eventually, I responded in kind.

Seems to me that you both have a valid point.

This is why we must always be mindfull (God knows that I have bigtime committed this faux pas a time or six thousand in my life) that others may not always interpret our words the way we meant them.

The pen is mightier than the sword... is it not?

 

[heatherrae]

No, initially I responded by saying that the article was not saying anything degrading about the institution of marraige, and that it was merely pointing out a statistical trend.

You came back and said:

My point is that our society discourages marriage by making abortion easy, shacking up acceptable, glorifying single parenthood, etc.

Yeah, I find that offensive, and I find you offensive. I started by merely pointing out that I don't think that people within these groups influence others to get divorces or stay married.

You started up with the personal attacks.

 

[Longhorn85]

You started up with the personal attacks.

Only if you take my opinion that marriage and family is better for kids as a personal attack, which you apparently do.

 

[heatherrae]

The only thing that I have pointed out about you personally is that you have probably had premarital sex and that I recall you saying in an old thread that you had committed adultery. I would not bring it up if it were not germane to the issue at hand in that you are hardly one to comment on single moms when those unions of yours could have resulted in a single parent situation.

In return, you told me about how my child would suffer because of my "bad choices" and how I'm "40 and living with my parents" none of which is remotely true. You couldn't even get my damn age right. You even went in another thread and called me a liar about being 1/4 native american. Yet, I am the "emotional" one because I am a woman who is arguing. You argue and think you are just so damned clever....lol. Foolish.

 

[heatherrae]

Only if you take my opinion that marriage and family is better for kids as a personal attack, which you apparently do.

LOL...BACKPEDAL as fast as you can. People can read the thread and see your hatred for themselves.