I will Not Marry the White WALES of the USA

[Grumpy Old Man]

Pfffffffffffft WTF do you know... you are merely a brokedigdog wannabe, like all the rest who worry so much about finding a woman who will be a slave barbie and not EVER take a penny of YOUR money.

Interesting a coupla the fellas before posted that they thought the only way they could think to protect their assets was to marry a woman of equivalent means or up. Yet they claim that a woman would marry them for love. Hmmmm seems sorta ironic when all they could seem to think to protect was their money, yet they claim they were looking for love. NOT ONE talks of what steps they took when choosing a mate to try to insure (never any guarantees) they would not lose their heart and 15 years of their lives.

Think of it this way, these people are posting about things they "think" up, they typically have no clue about life nor do they know with whom they interact. I see one person touting his marriage counselor skills not having any idea you happen to have authored what, 5 books on the subject? Well kinda makes his pee pee shrivel after hearing that. But hey these people mostly have little or no experience on this or many other subjects.

I dated women from Russia, Ukraine, Latvia, Belarus, Brazil, Venezuela, UK,Australia, New Zealand, Portugal, Spain, Germany, Finland, Poland, Hungary, France, Dominican Republic and that is enough for a start.

This is pretty innocuous thread, until you factor asstards speaking through their ass.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Think of it this way, these people are posting about things they "think" up, they typically have no clue about life nor do they know with whom they interact. I see one person touting his marriage counselor skills not having any idea you happen to have authored what, 5 books on the subject? Well kinda makes his pee pee shrivel after hearing that. But hey these people mostly have little or no experience on this or many other subjects.

I dated women from Russia, Ukraine, Latvia, Belarus, Brazil, Venezuela, UK,Australia, New Zealand, Portugal, Spain, Germany, Finland, Poland, Hungary, France, Dominican Republic and that is enough for a start.

This is pretty innocuous thread, until you factor asstards speaking through their ass.

Correction - only 3 dealing with the different types of internet dating and the relationships thereafter.

The other books have dealt with different topics altogether. But that fact in and of itself does not mean that I know what I am talking about, but only that I was able to put some words together and get someone else to take notice. So lets not make me out to have half a brain shall we?

I just find it odd that a man who claims to have a thriving practise in couples' counseling came to this thread and coulnd't IMMEDIATELY see the irony of the posts from some of the men. They claim they are repulsed by gold-diggers yet all they could talk about is how to protect their assets as if THAT is all they had to offer a woman. Then he tries to say that most men do NOT value beauty. Hmmm it will be interesting to see how he explains the thread title.

"Men value beauty and women value security, all else stems from this." That is our biology. What we do after we surpass our insticts, well that varies from individual to individual, hence the conclusion of that little pearl of wisdom "all else stems from this."

It isn't rocket science.

 

[Tatyana]

I like Welsh people.

 

[musclemom]

I like Welsh people.

 

[Gardenstateguy]

dude you have mental issues. There's nothing more sexy, sensual, hot and best in bed than American girls. Of course there's a lot of fat ugly girls but the ones who are not, are the best. If yu go to Miami 90% of the girls (latinas) are overweight; not to mention that most are ugly. Mexicans are Ugly, unless is a white mexican chick, asian girls don't do it for me at all. Russians are too boring.

The best of the world, a country blonde from Texas. That's the best creation of the Lord.

Newbie here and was intrigued by the generalization from all the different opinions of this thread (which is a good one in its own way simply for the initiation of conversation).
But the reality is that no matter where on this planet, no matter what year or century...there will always be conventionally good looking people and what we title as less attractive or "ugly". The countries in which these people live in is completely irrelevant. Fat, skinny, tall, short, ugly, hot... is everywhere.

Blondes the best creation....no way...Brunettes are the sexiest period. =] And Miami doesn't exemplify the gorgeousness of Latin women and by no means does this imply that other women from other countries are less attractive. We all have our 'Meagan Fox' and our 'Tori Spellings' right?

 

[Caleb's Tree]

Correction - only 3 dealing with the different types of internet dating and the relationships thereafter.

The other books have dealt with different topics altogether. But that fact in and of itself does not mean that I know what I am talking about, but only that I was able to put some words together and get someone else to take notice. So lets not make me out to have half a brain shall we?

I just find it odd that a man who claims to have a thriving practise in couples' counseling came to this thread and coulnd't IMMEDIATELY see the irony of the posts from some of the men. They claim they are repulsed by gold-diggers yet all they could talk about is how to protect their assets as if THAT is all they had to offer a woman. Then he tries to say that most men do NOT value beauty. Hmmm it will be interesting to see how he explains the thread title.

"Men value beauty and women value security, all else stems from this." That is our biology. What we do after we surpass our insticts, well that varies from individual to individual, hence the conclusion of that little pearl of wisdom "all else stems from this."

It isn't rocket science.

You got it all wrong BIKINI MOM. Hey, I read some of your posts, and like things you say, but on this account you are wrong.

They claim they are repulsed by gold-diggers yet all they could talk about is how to protect their assets as if THAT is all they had to offer a woman.

Prostitution is illegal in most states......correct?

And we can pretty much state that most of the times, love has nothing to do with money........correct?

But......what happens to most men.....is that they first "marry for love" and then later end up having to "pay for it."

Men are more than willing to take a chance on love, and most men don't really care how much a woman makes. What they do care about is being punished for taking that chance. Because the way this country punishes men for taking a chance on love, a prudent man is forced to consider things like prenups etc., especially if that man has been burnt by love before.

Men don't think in terms of "money is all I have to offer her" You are totally wrong on that. Men want love more than anything, but they don't want to be financially devastated for taking a chance on love, a chance that I might add should have nothing to do with money either before or after that chance is taken.

If you take a "chance on love," and have to "pay for it" later, then it's no different than prostitution. Prostitution should be legalized then so that some men can relieve their biological needs, and pay up front and be done with it, rather then paying a much larger bill at the end.

 

[Caleb's Tree]

My my but we ARE defensive aren't we.

You are 100% WRONG in your conclusions... but hey since YOU THINK that your fortune is *safe* because you married a woman with her own money, more power to you.

What you fail to understand is that when you take money AND sex out of the equation (security = money and beauty = sex) THEN WHAT IS LEFT? What is the basis for a couple to commit?

LOVE?

You are incorrect sir...

There are three forms of love:

eros
philos
agape

eros = sex
philos = non-sexual love/familial/friend etc
agape = mankind, the highest form of love

Tell me, which "love" did YOU and your wife marry for?

Mom.....you'd have been better off quoting Aerostotle.

I studied Philosopy as part of my degree, and though you mention three types of love, you fell short...because you haven't attached meaning to these types.

Here's a little snip from a required text I had to read in school.

Nichomachean Ethics

Aerostotle wrote this for his son as a guide to happiness.

In Book VIII, Chapter 3, Aristotle divides friendship into three species: friendships of good people (VIRTUE), friendships based on utility (USEFULLNESS) and friendships based on pleasure.

Friendships based on utility ("what can I get out of the other person, and how much must I give for it?") and/or pleasure ("I enjoy his wit", "She is pleasant to be with," etc.) alone, is described by Aristotle as incomplete, while friendships of good people, similar in virtue, are complete friendships.

The reason friendships based on utility are incomplete, is that they are motivated by short-term considerations and are contingent on changeable circumstances (1156a 20-30). Similarly, friendships based on pleasure are contingent on feelings and accidental conditions (1156a 31 - 1156b 3). The friendship of good people is most enduring, and complete, because they "wish goods to each other for each other’s own sake" (1156b 9-10), in addition to being useful and pleasant to each other.


When Aristotle says that friendship is necessary for the ethical life, he is referring to complete, or virtuous friendship, since incomplete friendships are not essentially friendships of virtue.

OK....the point I am making about finding someone who is your equal, finding someone who doesn't need you to take care of them..... isn't about greed......it's about finding someone who has virtue.

Finding someone that cares about you for you, and does not seek to gain anything from the relationship but to love, and be loved in return. That is the only lasting love.....all others are flawed.

If you don't get that concept, then nothing you say about love and relationships is valid.

A woman who won't sign a prenup to protect herself and her assets and to allow her man to protect his, is looking for something in return for giving her love and affection to a man. It's unfortunate that our laws have made it this way, and that societally, women all think they are owed a pay day when it's all over said and done, but that's the reality of the situation.

IN THE END......TRUE LOVE....IS THE ONLY THING WORTH MARRYING FOR.

But in this day and age, a man, and a woman have to eliminate personal gain from the equation to ensure that it is "true love" that they are making a contractual agreement with.

 

[gjohnson5]

Anyway women aren't searching for thier roles
Women are probably in America at the highest rate of being single moms , which means they have to fend for themselves. As one poster said , marriages are failing at probably the highest rates in America right now as well. Inflation and cost ov living are going up and salaries are not rising with it , so 2 incomes in many cases are required to keep your head above water

and LOL @ calling MuscleMoms post a generalization and then saying the blow

I honestly believe that as a generalization(which is never good to do) women in american haven't found their role. In the past (up to 25 years ago) the american womans role was to support her man. Since then that has changed and now they are searching for what their role is. This IMHO makes ir really hard to find an american woman, where foreign women have a different culture and are more sure of how they want to live.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Mom.....you'd have been better off quoting Aerostotle.

I studied Philosopy as part of my degree, and though you mention three types of love, you fell short...because you haven't attached meaning to these types.

Here's a little snip from a required text I had to read in school.

Nichomachean Ethics

Aerostotle wrote this for his son as a guide to happiness.

In Book VIII, Chapter 3, Aristotle divides friendship into three species: friendships of good people (VIRTUE), friendships based on utility (USEFULLNESS) and friendships based on pleasure.

Friendships based on utility ("what can I get out of the other person, and how much must I give for it?") and/or pleasure ("I enjoy his wit", "She is pleasant to be with," etc.) alone, is described by Aristotle as incomplete, while friendships of good people, similar in virtue, are complete friendships.

The reason friendships based on utility are incomplete, is that they are motivated by short-term considerations and are contingent on changeable circumstances (1156a 20-30). Similarly, friendships based on pleasure are contingent on feelings and accidental conditions (1156a 31 - 1156b 3). The friendship of good people is most enduring, and complete, because they "wish goods to each other for each other’s own sake" (1156b 9-10), in addition to being useful and pleasant to each other.


When Aristotle says that friendship is necessary for the ethical life, he is referring to complete, or virtuous friendship, since incomplete friendships are not essentially friendships of virtue.

OK....the point I am making about finding someone who is your equal, finding someone who doesn't need you to take care of them..... isn't about greed......it's about finding someone who has virtue.

Finding someone that cares about you for you, and does not seek to gain anything from the relationship but to love, and be loved in return. That is the only lasting love.....all others are flawed.

If you don't get that concept, then nothing you say about love and relationships is valid.

A woman who won't sign a prenup to protect herself and her assets and to allow her man to protect his, is looking for something in return for giving her love and affection to a man. It's unfortunate that our laws have made it this way, and that societally, women all think they are owed a pay day when it's all over said and done, but that's the reality of the situation.

IN THE END......TRUE LOVE....IS THE ONLY THING WORTH MARRYING FOR.

But in this day and age, a man, and a woman have to eliminate personal gain from the equation to ensure that it is "true love" that they are making a contractual agreement with.

I hear what you are saying however, I have a very different point of view.

Eros - is a sexual love. That is not *true love*.
This is based on hormones, our biological need to reproduce and nothing else. Everything else that individuals choose to attach to this is merely a way to justify morality.

Philos - is a non-sexual love. Love between parent/child, siblings, friends. This has nothing to do with hormones or reproduction but isn't the same feeling/drive that brings together life parners.

Agape - is the highest form of love. It is the love of all mankind. Think Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Jr, etc.

Since a couple is initially drawn to one another because of sex they don't commit because of love, they commit because of sex. Love is what happens along the way.

In my humble opinion: LIKE, RESPECT and COMMON LIFE GOALS are what couples should base their decision about who it is they should consider when choosing a life mate.

Men by virtue of their biology are very visual creatures. They are initially and very strongly attracted to a woman's beauty (whatever that definition of beauty might be). They need to find the woman attractive and stimulating in order to desire sex with her.

Women by virtue of their biology are attracted to security. Even though initially brawn might stimulate their eyes because we no longer live in the bush LOL a SMART woman will pass over muscles for very large brains every single time.

But that is only what attracts the sexes initially it is NOT what keeps them paired.

How will a woman know if a man values her for more than her *look* and how will a man know if a woman values him for more than his *portfolio*? I believe that when one removes BOTH from the equation, they will be free to make better choices.

There is a bit more to it, all outlined in my book (which will soon be e-available here on elite) but that is the gist of it.

*TRUE LOVE* is not why couples marry. How can they when they haven't been through life together?

LOVE is what they find during their journey in life together. It isn't what brings them together.

 

[Bikini Mod]

BTW - American men who truly think that a *foreign* woman will leave her entire life behind to marry him for something other than security (read = green card AND money) are fooling themselves to the Nth degree. The fact is that she is fully aware that if he couldn't find an American woman that was *good enough for him* that REALLY MEANS THAT HE IS DEFECTIVE and not *good enough for her either*. She would only be with him as a means to justify an end, so that SHE could have a better life (economic opportunities) for herself and any children she has or may have. PERIOD... then she will leave your ass in the gutter that it was when she met you.

I was American born but am Eastern European raised. My family has left the United States to return to our country so don't even TRY to debate me. I know what I am talking about. There are exceptions to every rule, true. But in general - I AM SPOT ON.

True, these women were raised with different family/life values than MOST American women. But that does not translate to abandoning them for an American man because he is *so much better than ALL of the men in HER country*. Hell many times she can't even speak English. What ON EARTH could she find soooooo appealing in a man who does not share HER CULTURE, RELIGION, HISTORY AND LANGUAGE?!?!?!

Why don't you see German or French or Spanish or Australian Bride dating sites? Hell the Aussies can speak English so you would think they would be immigrating to the US in droves... yet - THEY DON'T. Why do yall think THAT IS?!?!

DUH - It's because these women do not live in countries where their personal or their men's economic opportunities are so limited. Try and approach women from these countries and *offer them the chance of a lifetime to marry an American man*. The reaction would be for her to straight up LAUGH IN HIS FACE.

Please... yet these same men call American women gold-digging whores?!

HUH?

You have GOT to be kidding me.