You know this is silly , there in no such pressure , take a look at "Sex in the City" , a show that LIONISES women who sleep around . If there was a similar show about 4 men who in each episode fucked a different woman and met at lunch to compare their gynacology there would be an immediate outrage by feminists (and indeed the general public). It is crass and vulgar and does nothing to enhance people's lives. Modern "feminists" in general are people who have left behind "equality". I have dated and enjoyed the company of extremely sexual women I assure you , the most sexual woman i ever met was entirely un promiscuos and it is to this day a regret of mine that I did not marry her when I was 20.
No there is pressure on women to be "good girls". Women are called "sluts", "whores", "skanks" if they are promiscuous or dress provocatively by both men and women. Raped women are told that they deserve it if they have had many consensual partners. Some raped women are even looked as used property. If a woman does not know who the father of her child is it's looked upon as solely her fault. If a teenage girl gets pregnant she's looked down upon even if others know who the father is. If a women is showing too much skin or is a "slut", then people feel they have a right to disrespect her and see her as an object. Whenever people speak of a women having sex they use terms such as "passed around", "used goods", "taken advantage of", and so forth while a man in the same situation is seen as being the one in charge, the one "using" the woman. Fathers and brothers feel they have to keep their daughter/sister "pure" and "good" while nothing is said to sons and brothers. In other words women who are considered too sexual are harassed, demeaned, and disrespected for it by everyone, man and woman. Men just don't get that kind of treatment because people figure that's just how they are. Now you can't tell me what I'm saying is false. Just look around this board.
Perhaps you are the solitary exception mystique , I have travelled throughout Europe and the States extensively and I have YET to meet such a person. Even a notorious philanderer like Leonard Cohen wrote that "Everything we do in life , we do for love" , he eventually became a Buddhist monk. I'd be surprised if you were any different. Of course when we analyse the nature of love as some philosophers and psychologists have done we are left with the obvious truth: the desire for monogamous relations. Sex is great , making love is much better.
Maybe I am the exception to what you have seen. I'm not going to lie how I feel about sex to try to win some kind of points in this debate, that would be silly. I really see sex as sex and nothing else. I didn't love my boyfriend more after we had sex. I love him more now than before because we've been together longer and have shared many experiences (non sexual ones) and have gotten to know each other better. I think lots of people you've met did confuse sex with love because that is what they've been taught. However I really just love to have sex for the physical gratifications and nothing else.
REALLY? I hear it all the time , perhaps not in newspapers but amongst acquaintances , the reason being is that very few people have time for male emotions. You never hear of how heartbroken some guy was when his woman left him in a newspaper do you , no , but you hear of his suicide later.... men are just as/if not more frial than women. On the second point , its a running joke that women speak of their sexual histories to a far greater extent amongst other women than men ever would.
You do hear about it but it's nowhere near as talked about as it is with women. Plus a woman thought of to be sexual because of emotional/mental issues is talked about way more negatively than a man would be. Men demeaning the ones they slept with shows insecurity/low self esteem on their part but a woman having lots of partners or dressing in a certain way does not necessarily mean she is insecure or has low self esteem. Even if she did have insecurity/low self esteem issues, it doesn't mean she uses sex to "cure" it. That's just assumed for women by ignorant people.
I've met a few who thought that they were the exception , i'll grant you that , then after a little probing , it all comes back , someone hurt them and that's their pathethic fucking excuse. People such as this are spreaders of misery.
Yes and people like these also hate women because of what other women have done to them in the past and have immature emotional levels. I agree they are pathetic.
Feminism started out in that kind of vein with the sufragette movement , then it became a war against men.... circumcision is an obvious example when prominent feminists decry ONLY the female version. To her credit Germaine Greer identifies both as being mutilation and regards feminists who think otherwise as twisted.
I think the radical feminists aka. the weird twisted man hating ones are the ones that get the media attention because what they have to say is outrageous and the media loves that kind of stuff. However I think the real feminists, the everyday regular people, still believe in what feminism is truly about. They just don't get heard often because what they have to say is nothing sensational. Maybe to a few mysogynists but not most. Here is a good website about modern feminism.
http://www.io.com/~wwwave/
Well I'm thankful for your respect and hope that likewise you feel respected. HOWEVER , in precisely those Nothern European countries which have the most "progressive" attitudes towrds sex are drug abuse and prostitution most closely linked. Of all the people you mention I GUARANTEE you that the highest mortality rate is amongst prostitutes , drugs are a release for most people , for prostitutes they are a way to live with themselves. And you are furthermore incorrect , many prostitutes start out in Europe doing it for a little money and get caught out in the spiral leading to drug abuse. There is plenty of research out there mystique , mammals and in particular primates are in general monogamous. You mention that you have had some mental issues , I'm sorry to hear this , sorry but not surprised , I'm not saying that it was promiscuity that fucked you up, I'm saying that there is an ENORMOUS wealth of empirical evidence associating the two things. Now you may be stronger and tougher than the average human being and if you are fair play to you but the stats say otherwise. Sex per se isnt bad , but promiscuity brings with it a host of psychological issues for people.
Well I just want to say I have never been promiscuous so my mental problems are in no way connection to sex, especially since I've had them way before I even knew what sex was. I think promiscuity brings psychological issues for many people because of the way sex is seen and taught. It's still seen as something dirty and not worthy of respect. It's still taught as something you do only when you love someone. Maybe that's why alot of prostitutes get into the drugs because they feel that somehow they're doing something "dirty" and "wrong". Also most people do not see prostitutes as human beings but objects. Prostitutes get treated by people with no respect of any kind because of the way people believe about sex. I'm sure if you were getting treated like shit everywhere you went, weren't even acknowledged as a human being with emotions and feelings, started believing all that, and had guilty feelings because you were taught you job makes you inferior to others, you might get into drugs too. I don't think the promiscuity is making prostitutes dabble in drugs but the way people view and think of sex.
On another note I don't think you have to be promiscuous to show your sexuality or be sexual. I'm just saying that is a matter of preference to some people.
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