Boyfriend advice & working out

[velvett]

I think that men and women need time to themselves and can choose what they wish to do during those time without outside judgement.

If he doesn't respect your desire to spend time working out he doesn't respect you.

Something to sit sit down and discuss rationally as he just might not see the importance as you do.

 

[PowerPrincess]

Jealousy is normal, but taken to the extreme is a sign of self confidence issues.

He looks like he's trying to bring you down to make himself look better. That's extreme! (this is just an opinion, from what I know of him, but I don't know much)

Does he do that on other occasion?
For example you go out with his friends and when you get a compliment, like:"You look fit, are you working out?" He jump in an answer for you with something like:"She doesn't work out that hard"

Is he older than you?

Is he considered rich?

Actually, he never puts me down - he just says, you're perfect the way you are - which annoys me b/c i don't believe that and i just wish he'd be more supportive of me at the gym, kinda like wow, you're doing amazing getting up so early and eating perfectly day after day (in a perfect world - he'd say that )

Is he older than me - yes, by 12 yrs.
But I like older men, turn me on more.

Is he considered rich? - Yes. But I like successful people, b/c they have determination and goals and that's what I aspire to be and do

 

[velvett]

Actually, I got an idea. Next time he's going on about the gym, tell him your really too tired from working out to listen to all that crap. In fact, tell him to shut up and go make you a sandwich because you need the protein. You can also tell him that if he behaves himself, you'll let him lick your pussy later.


j/k

OMG!


Brilliant.

 

[velvett]

Is he older than me - yes, by 12 yrs.
But I like older men, turn me on more.

Same age as my beau.

Five years off turning 40 - he may just be worried that you'll get board with him, think he is an old fart and find someone in his 20's to be more interesting.

 

[Quadsweeps Sister]

Well, he could just not be interested in working out and really does think you look fine & is satisfied with how you look......or.....he could feel threatened that you will look better & attract other men, thus dumping him in the process or is threatened that you found an interest away from him.....or neither....QUOTE]


I think you hit it on the head, he's always worried men are going to hit on me. It's kinda frusturating, b/c i'm always like are you crazy, they never talk to me - why would they start now, but he insists that they will....

he says he doesn't have time to go to the gym, and he has definitely put on 10lbs in the past 10 months at least in his belly....and i know he knows it.

Wow - i can't believe this topic came up. My friend and i were talking about it the other day. In training clients and just knowing people at the gym - lives are ultimately changed by "changing" ones body. I can't say how many people i've known in relationships & marriages who join a gym and then a year passes and they aren't together anymore. When a person's self-esteem rises because they feel/look better, they are often able to get out of a situation they were willing to accept previously. Personally i have always tried to date people who were into some form of fitness because it has been such a big part of my life. I do hope everything works out for you. I also hope feelings of bitterness & resentment do not enter your mind as you get healthier and he does not - but they may, so be prepared for that. Being physically attracted to your partner is a large part of a relationship - you have to in some way find that person beautiful no matter what makes them appear that way to you.

 

[vinylgroover]

In training clients and just knowing people at the gym - lives are ultimately changed by "changing" ones body. I can't say how many people i've known in relationships & marriages who join a gym and then a year passes and they aren't together anymore. When a person's self-esteem rises because they feel/look better, they are often able to get out of a situation they were willing to accept previously. .

That's a pretty shallow excuse for ending a relationship/marriage. Hey, i'm buffed now so i'm moving on to something better.

As far as Power princess' problem goes, you need to work out whether you really want a partner who is jealous of you. Jealousy is one of the most unproductive and dangerous of emotions. And don't give me the crap about how well he treats you and that he's a good person and all that other shit that women come up with. Good people don't get jealous of their partners, they trust them, support them and encourage them.

I would never be with anyone who even had a tiny hint of jealousy.

 

[T&T]

Actually, he never puts me down - he just says, you're perfect the way you are - which annoys me b/c i don't believe that and i just wish he'd be more supportive of me at the gym, kinda like wow, you're doing amazing getting up so early and eating perfectly day after day (in a perfect world - he'd say that )

I pesonnally don't take it as a compliment here, I'm reffering to the "you're perfect the way you are" comment, he should always support you!

You can PM pictures of you, to persons on the board you trust the most they will tell you if your making progress or not. (Not the same, but still encouraging)

Is he older than me - yes, by 12 yrs.
But I like older men, turn me on more.

Is he considered rich? - Yes. But I like successful people, b/c they have determination and goals and that's what I aspire to be and do

I was just wondering if he was using you as a trophy. I don't know enough to really tell, but I think not if he doesn't put you down in front of others.

P.S. I'm gonna kick your ass!!! if you decide to listen to him and quit working out.

Do what YOU like to do it's as simple as that.

 

[T&T]

I think that men and women need time to themselves and can choose what they wish to do during those time without outside judgement.

If he doesn't respect your desire to spend time working out he doesn't respect you.

Something to sit sit down and discuss rationally as he just might not see the importance as you do.

Wise words!

I love you

 

[FitFossil]

... Good people don't get jealous of their partners, they trust them, support them and encourage them...

TRUE TRUE TRUE! Not only for partners but friends as well.

 

[Fantômas]

That's a pretty shallow excuse for ending a relationship/marriage. Hey, i'm buffed now so i'm moving on to something better.

I don't think that's what she was saying at all. It's more that when one is fat and lazy and unhappy with him/herself, they will be more likely to "put up" with someone's shit because they value themselves less than they ought to. As they start to take pride in themselves (physically and mentally- we all know they evolve together) and realize some self worth, they won't take someone putting them down, or making things difficult or that they simply have very different life goals now. That's not shallow at all. That's self respect. That's how I read that anyway...