When you're dating.....when does the exclusive/non exclusive topic come up?

[calveless wonder]

Just curious as to how people handle this.

do you tell them up front your stance or do you wait till it comes up?

obviously if you're the one who wants to discuss it, you probably bring it up. but what if it's the other person and you think that's their expectation to begin with?

 

[nimbus]

wait till it comes up

 

[Jon79]

you can pretty much tell the intentions right away.. maybe bring it up if u see it start going that way.. especially if you dont want it to. some girls you can just tell right away that they are looking for an exclusive deal...

anyway what up bro? im west coast now come visit this summer

 

[jnevin]

Just curious as to how people handle this.

do you tell them up front your stance or do you wait till it comes up?

obviously if you're the one who wants to discuss it, you probably bring it up. but what if it's the other person and you think that's their expectation to begin with?

You can say what you want all day, but as soon as someone on either side catches feelings the up front conversation goes out the window, in their mind at least. If you're not both on the same page, cut ties. Staying with someone because you feel obligated to is not so good.

 

[redshirt27se]

bring it up if you want to be exclusive with her. otherwise, fuck it. if she never asks, then thats on her.

 

[ponyfitness]

Usually once someone starts feeling jealous feelings. If you get jealous when you think about other dudes trying to get with her then you should probably have the talk.

 

[calveless wonder]

no lol, it's not me (like some people have assumed in this thread)

it's them. i just don't want to hurt anybody. i have several girls ive been hanging out with that are all good hearted girls...with looks, brains and personality . but they're starting to like me way too much and i don't know if i want to be in a relationship right now.

you would imagine it would be a good problem to have...but that means i'd have to either pick 1 or none. not sure i want to do that

 

[BNG]

Have you given them any reason to believe that you want exclusivity? Otherwise, leave it alone, and when one of them starts in that direction be prepared to give them the "you're great but I'm not ready to do that again just yet" speech. This approach has led to good times and little trouble.

 

[RottenWillow]

prior to touchie of the breastesses and way before vag touchie

 

[nimbus]

if you deep down believe it's ok to have multiple girls...i mean like you really feel you deserve it, and you don't think you're screwing these girls over... you can reflect that through your words and actions, and you can pull it off