Whats the stupidest thing you have seen at your gym

[HorseBalls]

Ive got another, this time at my school gym. There is a chinning bar mounted to the wall about 7 1/2 feet off the ground. This short ass kid, prob 5ft 5 scrambles up the wall an hangs upside down by folding his legs around the bar. Then his does his version of inverted situps. Like its a benificial movement and thats the best place to do them.

same place but another time...there was two kids attempting squats for their first time. One was squatting with a plate a side and the other was spotting, except he was spotting from a chair in the corner and not paying attention. The dude puls off a couple half ass reps and on his next one gets about 3/4 the way up and cant go anymore. hes straining and stuck in that position for a good 5 secs before he slowly starts tipping backwards, pivoting on his heels. Total slow motion tipping until he was at about 45 degrees and then me an another dude ran over and caught him.
I still dont think his spotter noticed.

 

[Quadsweep]

I have to a agree about people that don't do legs. there is a kat at my gym that has a fucking huge upper body but legs smaller then his arms it is so funny.

I hate that. Tell them they should walk on their hands!

 

[Quadsweep]

Some chick shit herself in my gym. bump

HAHAHHAHAHAHA! I am a PT and have been for 10 years. I still have not even had one of my female clients fart much less shit! I would have lost it!

 

[648]

Do you guys have the type of guy in your gym that is fat as fuck and benches 405 and walks around like he is God. We have plenty at our gym if you guys need some at yours.

648

 

[PlateNeck]

Funny

OK I'm done laughing to tell you about this guy that comes into my gym. He is about 50, 6'1" and hunched over a bit. He comes in wearing spandex and a sweatshirt as old as him, and to top it off uses those gloves you find in the hardware store with the knobs all over to improve grip (I think used for hauling drywall) but he wears them 5 sizes to big. Well he is known for making lots of noise. so he mounts up on this contraption for hamstring extensions. instead of doing one leg at a time he is resting on his chest both legs in the sturips and off he goes looking like a flailing fish sqeeling out loud like he was on deliverance or something. I had to go after that, game over.......

 

[gtaman]

I've got a million of these - how to pick just two...

- The personal trainer leading three 350-lb. heifer ladies in crunches arched over a Swiss ball.... raw deal for the Swiss ball....

- There is a guy who I only see about once a month. Outwardly handsome but far from normal. He's always wearing these dark smoked shades in the gym and has a blond perm - looks like "Clay Collins" from the old SCTV sendup "Days of the Week" - I think half the time he works out in street clothes too but I could be wrong - this guy is anywhere from 23-40 yrs old - very hard to tell - WHAT'S UP WITH THE SHADES!! not to mention that hair...

I think it's funny how everyone comes up with names for the weird people in their gym... my wife and her friends in aerobics classes have a name for this older lady - looks kind of good from a distance but tons of plastic surgery, collagen, etc. - always checking everyone else out with this melodramatic look on her face - anyway they call her "The Contessa"

And what is with the guys & gals who partner up to do abs on the floor, you know where they fight their partner's resistance on lying leg lifts... I'm sure it's an effective exercise but these people are not generally in good enough shape for it to matter at all vs. regular ab training... when it's two girls I feel like telling them to get a room! because it's getting me hot...

 

[FreakMonster]

OH WAIT I just remembered a classic.

These 2 guys always train together. They both thought they were some kind of chick magnet hammers when in reality they couldnt get laid in a whore house. Anyway, they come dressed in kinda spandex bicycle shorts and BIG loop muscle shirts where you see everything. They are both about 6 foot tall and weigh about 170. Well one day one of the guys was trying to MACK on this girl at the gym. He is acting all nonchalant while he's talking to her and lays down on the flat bench to do some bench press. His partner/spotter slaps a 45 and 25 on each side. The guy on the bench is struggling at rep 5 when his spotter who is standing over him rips a juicy fart. The guy on the bench now has the full weight of the bar on his chest and can't get it off. His partner is laughing so hard, he can't get it off. Finally he pushes the bar off to the side where it comes crashing to the floor and he falls off the bench. He gets to his knees and starts vomiting. It was fuckin awesome.

LMFAO BWHWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHA

 

[cladshirt]

Re

We have a few guys at our gym that have wore the same fucking clothes every time they come in. They must have one set of workout clothes. Bunch of us just laugh when they come in.

 

[The Ranger]

Everyone has them, and yes, no gym would be the same without them either. We stand back between sets watching the crazy shit they come up with, the poor form, and the shit woofing of how they were HUGE back in the day....of course this is all before you had weights, they just lifted rocks and dinosaurs and shit....well on to the topic at hand.

There is this one fuck who comes in when the crowd is rocking, and I found out he is a doctor....(scary as Hell). Soon as he walks in the door,he just stands there watching for 20 minutes or so, never moves. Then he drops his gym bag, takes off his pants, and out comes the Spandex. Now, before everyone goes nuts, I love spandex on chicks that have a great body, for those who don't, wear a damn shower curtain or something.

This idiot then takes off his shirt, down to that Chia-pet looking chest. Needless to say, because of the hair, we call him " The Troll ".....Shoes and socks are next, barefoot, and legs that look like hockey sticks with hair. Everything is now scattered just inside the door....pants, shirt, smelly socks and shoes....now we all get to see a 80 pound overweight Pro at work....

Same routine, day after day, never changes, never alters at all....

Dumbbell curls with 5lb. weights, 100 plus reps as fast as you can, now start grunting and screaming at rep 50....I'm sure you can get a visual now....and mind you, don't try and grab those 5lb. weights, they will be with him the entire workout....

Dumbbell presses, yup, you guessed it....same as curls, but now we have an added feature boys and girls....Yes, my children, it gets better. You see, starting with the second excercise of 12, the SWEAT begins....not that small sheen on the brow shit...I'm talking yellow stained, sticky, funky smelling sweat from one strange, and ugly fuck-nut. And after each set, he just stands there grinning like a mule eat'n briars like he's done something.......Now, a few members cut the workout short, they seem to know when a professional is at work, he needs more room.....and he gets plenty.

Well, to cut a long story short....Ole Ranger hasn't been known for patience on certain things, gym manners being top of the list....In my travels, I have strived to take young Iron Brothers and Sisters under my wing and enlighten them on my personal thoughts....and hence my latest woes begin tonight....

A couple of the younger Iron Brothers who think I am some kind of God, and I can't for the life of me figure out why, heh heh heh, decided to help me in my plan to foil " The Troll "!!

His pattern was simple, and he never strayed from it...not once. We watched, we waited...the anticipation building. This was our night, we would purge the Iron Humanity of this spreading sickness....<or so I told the Young Brothers>

There was the cue..." The Troll " began to put his clothes on over top of his nasty, sweaty ass....TIME TO MOVE!!!!

Our recon was perfect, the ambush was set....we waited. Here he came out the building to his Lexus, the cold bushes itching our noses, but we endured....he was singing " Hello Dolly " as to mock us.....I gave the signal and the action began....

Iron Brother number 1 runs up, ski mask hiding his face, a 5 gallon bucket full of cold water and industrial strength cleaner hits " The Troll " full body. Perfect timing, the sickness is dazed, confused......

As he begins to utter profanity, Iron Brother number 2 and 3 move into action....we were all dressed in black, full-faced ski masks.....Another 5 gallon bucket, but this time, ice cold water....sort of a rinse cycle I would guess....Iron Brother number three dashes by and hits his fading hairline, and pudgy, pock-marked face with liquid wax.....Why wax you ask.....couldn't hurt now could it!!!

And last but not least, yours truly comes from the blind side....I must admit, I am a true planner. " The Troll " then recieves the final touches....A full 5 gallon bucket full of LIME.....Why lime?? To ensure the stench never returns.....keeps dead bodies from stinking, outa work on his nasty ass as well......

We dash across the grass, hit a used car lot....gone.

Entire operation is a success, no casulties, no injuries, no " Troll " .....Well, that was my night, how was yours.....

Anyone else have these retards in their gym???

Retards....Hmmmmmmmmmm....Now there's another story, but we'll save that one for another time my Brutha's and Sista's....

Peace

Ranger

 

[Jacked4Real]

RANGER>> WOW

BAHAHAHHA DAMn that is a classic ! WHat is your fee for ridding trolls from a gym?? I think I would like to contract your services : )