Strongman gay post

[musclebrains]

I'm sorry.....I think you're being a bit naive if you think that the children of the same sex parents will not have any issues dealing with other children. My son is already seeing issues being that he has to explain that his new stepfather is not his real father. Kids look for any reason to pick on other kids. I'm definitely sensitive to this because I was picked on relentlessly as a kid because I was small.

That being said, a loving home, same sex or opposite sex, is certainly better than no home at all. I'm not saying same sex parents can't love just as much as a mother and father. I just think saying that there is no "baggage" is a little shortsighted.

I don't disagree with this. HOwever, the teasing a child is subjected to in this circumstance is no worse than one who has parents who are different in other respects.

I'm not sure if your post is addressed to me, but pertinent to the citation of my naivete, I wonder how many gay parents with children you know.

 

[musclebrains]

"""Its COMMON SENSE that a child would be better off with a mother and a father. Its absurd to even try to argue otherwise. Sure there are other factors that you mentioned that affect a child's upbringing... but obviously partents play the biggest role. I have nothing against same sex relationships... but the kids would be better off with a loving mother and father than with two loving carpet eaters.""


This says all that needs to be said by way of explanation. Ignore actual reality in favor of "common sense" -- which just happens to be your sense of things, unsupported by reasonably objective research. Then, having made a claim purportedly based on (archaic) psychological principles from the middle of the last century, reveal your actual objections by insulting gay women.

You'll forgive me for not taking your "common sense" too seriously when it always seems to come down to a visceral objection to homosexuality itself. I suggest, if you are gay, you not adopt children. If you are straight, you have nothing to worry about, do you -- unless you happened to adopt a gay child.

By the way, yeah, I compare the situations of all minorities to one another. All minorities are marginalized by the dominant culture and their "pathologies" are the social consequences of the marginalization, not of those inherent qualities that separate them. By your logic, Mexicans are marginalized because they are lazy, have too many children and smell bad -- in the way gay people are marginalized for, um, not reproducing.

 

[musclebrains]

None. What's your point?

It was addressed to the entire thread, by the way.

My point, obviously, is that your own contention about the situation of adoptees of gay parents is naive in terms of personal experience.

YOu're generalizing your experience to others. I bet you would have a VERY difficult time finding anyone who didn't feel teased, even tormented, for a period in childhood.

 

[starfish]

I know lots of gay couples... My own brother is gay.. and adopted

Some of the people I respect most in this world are gay. They've treated me a heck of a lot better than many straight people.

 

[mattcanning99]

we live in this world whether you want to accept it or not. we live in a world of harsh realities and scary truths.

no matter how "nice" it would be if everyone was politically correct and an idealist, the reality is - it's not a good thing to be at all - you can't turn an eye away from the realities that we're surrounded by.

could a woman ever hold the world record for the 100 metre run? more than likely: no...that's the sad truth and being politcally correct won't change that. women and men are built differently, handle problems differently, etc, they are a different species, with different hormone levels and brain structure, that's a fact, that's just how it is.

likewise, with the same sex couple raising children...im not a homophobe by any means, but is it honestly the same for a child to be raised by a same sex couple than one raised by an opposite sex couple? no, it isn't - that's the truth and no amount of debate can deny that. culturally, that child would know he or she is raised "differently" than the other children, and that would no doubt have an affect, as children will not be able to see the logic behind why things are as easily as an adult. as DOT mentioned, children will use ANY means to make fun of another child, and that child would more than likely be ostracized and tormented more than most. being politcally correct isn't going to change the playground bullies. that's a fact. accept it or not.

is the difference a guarantee of something bad? not necessarily...a child raised by an opposite sex couple could raise an unhealthy child, where a child raised by a same sex couple could turn out very happy and healthy.

all that i will point out is that there is a "difference", it is not "the same" and never will be. im not saying it's better or wose, but different for sure

 

[mattcanning99]

also i think i should point out that we're in a transitional phase as a society. when i was growing up, most textbooks used "he" or "him", and "man / men", where most of the textbooks i now use are leaning towards using "her" or case studies involving female prime ministers, etc, more than they had before.

it's different to see this, after being so used to the way things were. in a few years, we will all be used to it...same way that same sex relationships experience a lot of prejudice these days. we are in a transitional time where it will become more accepted and respected to be a same sex couple / same sex couple w/ child(ren).

ever notice how a lot of people use "gay" or "fag" as an insult? that will probably decrease over time soon as well

 

[musclebrains]

likewise, with the same sex couple raising children...im not a homophobe by any means, but is it honestly the same for a child to be raised by a same sex couple than one raised by an opposite sex couple? no, it isn't - that's the truth and no amount of debate can deny that. culturally, that child would know he or she is raised "differently" than the other children, and that would no doubt have an affect, as children will not be able to see the logic behind why things are as easily as an adult. .

Different from whom?

Different from people raised in two-parent mixed-gender households.

Yes, it's different. So what? Where is the evidence that it's any more significant than the "difference" of being raised black in a white neighborhood, of being the child of handicapped parents, of being the child of poor people on scholarship at a private school, of being the child of mixed-race parents, of being the child of old parents, of being the child of a convicted felon, of being the child of a preacher, of being short, of being fat, of being thin, of being mentally disabled, of being whatthefuckever?

Where is your evidence that it's any more traumatic to have two daddies than one mother or one father or a blind father who can't play ball with you?

Is it that this seems especially traumatic to YOU because of your own attitudes toward homosexuality and the attitudes of those in your immediate culture?

This perfect world you keep referring to doesn't exist and never has. I think any reasonable person can agree that two gay men, with good incomes and doting natures, will be better for a child than many alternatives. Yet we don't see posts every five days about the dangers of childrearing by child molesters and abusers.

 

[mattcanning99]

im not saying it's in any way "worse" im just saying it's "different".

frankly, im tired of politically correct idealists who want everything to be the same. that's not how it is. remember, it's not worse but also not the same, so you can't just shrug it off and say it is.

 

[musclebrains]

im not saying it's in any way "worse" im just saying it's "different".

frankly, im tired of politically correct idealists who want everything to be the same. that's not how it is. remember, it's not worse but also not the same, so you can't just shrug it off and say it is.

How is granting minorities freedom to love one another and raise families making everything the same? In fact, it's just the opposite. It's encouraging the freedom to be different.

And considering how "different" everyone is, I will continue to maintain that the importance of the difference in this particular case relates to your own values -- not to anything demonstrably true. When you start fretting about the linguistic impact of life with deaf parents, I'll start worrying about the impact of having two daddies on a Chinese orphan.

 

[flexed1]

To think kids would pick on other kids who have gay parents is not a good argument. Kids pick on kids period. They pick on each other as we all did when we where in school. I agree that a normal mom and dad can't be replaced by a gay couple but lets be serious how many normal mom and dads are out there? why are so many kids fucked up? simple parents. why not allow gays who would love and care for kids to adopt. I would and probaly will adopt and have the money to do it. i know I would be a great father as I know my fashions and values. Would I replace a mom and dad? nope but tell ya what my kids would be raised with values, morales, and be held responsible as many today are not. When I was a kid my mom died so I was raised by my dad. Did and do I miss my mom? yup to this day 30 years later greatly but I learned how important parents really are and I think most parents have no idea how kids look up to them.