New Attitude

[Zander1983]

its a long story, but its basically because we are too good of friends and dont wanna compromise it. i really hope we date sometime though, shes the only person ive ever felt love for.

I'm going to send you a PM when I get back home from Uni, because my girl was in exactly the same situation you are.

 

[Lee]

sounds good man. another reason is that we are both moving after high school graduation, so we'll be seperated for like 3 or 4 months, then if all goes as planned, ill be moving to california to where she will be staying.

 

[louden_swain]

sounds good man. another reason is that we are both moving after high school graduation, so we'll be seperated for like 3 or 4 months, then if all goes as planned, ill be moving to california to where she will be staying.

I hope things work out for you. This sounds like a great opportunity and maybe something serious can emerge from this.

 

[DrBones]

thx for the advice c, i am very kind to women. especially my best friend, she is an awesome girl and i treat her like an angel, too bad we cant go out

Not to rain on your parade, but I had the EXACT same situation when I was in high school, I thought I was so incredibly in love with this girl, who was my best girl friend.. we were such good friends to the point we actually told each other we loved each other... The furthest things ever went was we kissed.... We are still friends today, but there is not a chance in hell I would ever want to be with her now.... We are just completely different people... thats the shitty part about people you know in high school, and say 5 years later. Some of the rowdiest kids can become the calmest nicest people, and some of the nicest people, while they may stay nice, might venture in a completely opposite direction from where you are standing. I never had a girlfriend all through my grade 12 year because I was so infatuated with this girl.... If it is meant to be it will happen eventually... don't sit and waste your time waiting... I made that mistake with my most recent gf of over 2 years when we broke up... I wouldn't let myself get emotionally involved with any girls because In the back of my head I was waiting to be with her....

Basically what Im getting at, is test the waters, see other girls, if things are meant to be between the two of you, it will happen in the future when you are least expecting it... don't put too much pressure on her either or things could backfire on you bud... just trying to let you know what I've gone through and try to prevent you from following in the same footsteps... if you wanna talk about it PM me.... You sound a lot like me, and sound like you have a lot of traits that I pocess/did pocess... we can yack about it if you want...

Keep being a good person bro....

 

[Lee]

thats interesting DrBones, cuz i was starting to feel kinda odd about the whole situation with her. i got to thinking, and if she truly did want to be with me, we would be going out, regardless. i really gotta think about this whole thing, cuz its been buggin me for a while.

 

[louden_swain]

Bones,

I also had a similar situation!! The thing is we still keep in touch even though we live 150 miles apart. Who knows what will happen. . .how do you handle situations like that


Anyway keep training hard Lee!!

 

[Lee]

goin to the gym in 15 mins, biceps and backs are gona get an ass whoopin today!

 

[DrBones]

how do you handle situations like that

Its funny... its almost like i liked the feeling of wanting her so badly... when it started to fade I wanted it to come back.. it was like mystery butterflies.... The thing that really killed it for me with her was we got in a fight, I was always there for her... if i was out and she paged me in the middle of the night upset, I would abandon all my friends and go home and listen to her cry for 2 hours. I watched her go through around 3-4 boyfriends and all I desperately wanted was to be one of them. We even talked about being together one day...
Anyways, my dad was going in for surgery one day and I told her I was worried about him... her friend had also just finished getting surgery... she flipped out on me and told me I was selfish and never listened to her and only talked about myself.... when the truth was I called her and listened to all her problems probably at least 4 times a week and never mentioned a peep of the negative things going on around me...
Just like you louden, she lived almost 250 miles away... which made things even harder. She now lives here and I talk to her probably once a month and I will probably always be friends with her but I see no real potential for us ever becoming anything more than friends..... We have a few other problems after this initial one which was just the icing on the cake which completely turned me away from her and actually made me wonder what I ever saw in her... I met her when I was 17 and the dreams were crushed by mid 19.

On a more recent note, I broke up with my ex-gf of 2.5 years, 7 ago in may. I tried going back to her about a week after the breakup and she said no.... I then basically lived depressed and unhappy for a long time and never let any girl have the time of day(I would abandon every girl within 2 weeks of dating them). To tell you the truth I still think about her at least 10 times a day and how we will most likely never have any more moments like the ones i have in my memory. Its funny, because I wrote her some letters post breakup and they were all ass kissing letters sayin i miss you and all this garbage.... whats funny is that I dug out a box full of letters a few weeks ago that girls have given me and ones i never wound up sending out over the course of the last 6-7 years(im 22, same birthday as you i think louden..) and they sound exactly how the most recent letters I've sent.... you know what that means? Its not impossible for me to get over someone who you think is the only person for you in the world.

You know what you have to do to get around it? Focus on something so hard.... im talking SO HARD 110%... that you dont have time to think about her/it. Every time I think about how I miss her..... I think to myself... GET BIGGER, GET RIPPED..(this can conflict.. bulking/cutting.. lol) but its WAY better than sitting by yourself or driving by yourself contemplating what could/should have happened.

My biggest thing is missing memories.. and thinking no new ones will ever transpire..... and this makes me terribly sad... and who knows.. maybe one day I will wind up back with my ex.... but in the time being, I have to tell myself that there is no point in hoping or waiting, and getting on with my life... because that day may never come. Find another person, who you can dump all your energy into... get into a relationship with them and treat them like your angel, don't treat them lesser because of your aspirations to be with another person... its unfair.... In a matter of no time the other girl will be gone from your head and you two can stick to being good buddies.

I hope all this helped

 

[louden_swain]

Bones interesting story. . .a good read.

 

[Lee]

very interesting bones. thats pretty much how i am with this girl. im still a virgin *blush* at 17, and ive skipped out 3 chances of having sex since i fell for this girl all in the hopes of losing it to someone i reall love and care about. i think the world of this girl and would never hesitate to try to help her if she were in trouble. she means everything to mean, and it kills me that the memories will be all i have of her in a few years, cuz i really dont know whats gonna happen between us from here on out. we graduate from high school together on may 28th, and from there she is going to visit her sister in texas for a while, then most likely end up living with her other sister in cali. meanwhile ill most likely be moving to seattle to live with my brother. even though we both agreed that i could move down to cali with her after a few months when i have some money, she could always find a new guy who flat out tells her i can go, or somethin else like that. its the future that scares me more than anything.