First date with hubby he arrived 1h late cuz he fell asleep, I was.about to leave, I wasnt mad cuz I knew, he had 2 full time jobs at the time.
Second date we went on was an outdoor bar, a roach landed in the ice bucket and he kinda flicked it into the air and it landed right in my cleavage
I had to flash everyone to get it out, then scratched my breasts raw
Third date we crashed against a glass window moving truck that skipped a stop sign
I was wearing a short skirt, knee high boots and a low cut shirt, the hot airbags burned my boobs and thighs... Husband then called "his lawyer" who turned out to be his dad
nice first impression... Burned and slutty
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