Anyone here grow up poor?

[Cleaner]

I grew up on the wrong side of the road.
Did without alot...never hurt me any.

Went to a very wealthy public school.
It was hard......I don't remember a time in my life i was not fight for or about something.
My older brother wouldn't fight...just him....so I would fight his battles also...kinda thought I had to up hold the family name..I guess..seems all very stupid now.

In high school I can remember one kind got a 150 bucks a week allowance, a gas card and money for cloths. His parent bought him a 69 ford mach1 mustang with a 429 corba jet for his 16 birthday...he never understood what that car was....ran it into a telephone pool about two month later.

I just know that it made me who I am and no matter how bad i had it my parents had it much worse than I.

 

[Imnotdutch]

Most of my family collect handouts from the government just to make ends meet. There is also this attitude in the area that I grew up that an education is worthless because there isnt enough work to use it and you cannot fight the class system in this country. Our class system dictates that the working class should remain working class and serve our superiors. I called bullshit on that one.....and worked hard for my education. The only way I could stay in school to do the necessary exams was to work 10 hours a day on a construction site and be an "external candidate".

My clothes were occasionally from a charity shop.....but I'd rather have them than have nothing. I'm 1 of only 4 out of my extended family of over 70 that actually stayed in school after age 16....because there is so little money available in my part of the country that kids are expected to get out and support themselves asap. According to the older people in that part of the country I'm the first person in 45 years to get a Ph.D that they can remember.....and I had to fight the system all of the way. Even now my background is held against me.

This is one reason why I'm going to quit research in a couple of months to be a teacher. If I only persuade a couple of kids from deprived backgrounds that they can do well then its worth it. And I hope to recruit these kids into my army that will overthrow the government and eventually take over the world.......

RyanH, anytime you feel like making your little "problem" smaller just give me a shout. I'll be happy to help you find some worthy causes. You might consider it therapy. I dont know how you manage when you have such a heavy burden to carry......

BM: What does "both my parents were off the boat mean"? Where are they from? Impressive story anyway. BTW I get this ad at the top of my page sometimes when I'm here....its just the top half of a womans face. Dark hair and intense look. It looks like you.....is it?

I grew up relatively wealthy.

But, I'd rather be poor. Money brings just as many problems as not having it does. I save money, watch my spending, so I can make sure I'll always be comfortable.

But, I'll always refuse to be excessively wealthy.

 

[WODIN]

I grew up very poor. There were alot of hungry and sleepless nights, I had a very similar life as Rizzo's.

 

[Bikini Mod]

16, wealthy and loving it, but everyone thinks im spoiled, which im not. People just look at how i look and call me spoiled, or the way i live, ppl are SO ignorant.
I study just as hard as anyone else in school, i hate ppl giving me that "oh with that money you have you're life is already set" bullshit

Brotha, if I was in your shoes, hell I'd be lovin' it too! I am glad that even though you admit you are priviliged you STILL study hard...keep it up. Don't WASTE YOUR PRIVILIGE!

Dutch, the expression "off the boat" means that you are an immigrant. Both my parents are from the same village in Hungary, though they came here nearly a decade apart. They married in this country. They worked hard for everything we had and though they fucked up a lot, I still appreciate what they did (ESPECIALLY MY MOTHER) for us. Their story though is no less remarkable than the stories of countless other immigrants before them and after them. Hell, knowing what I know now......my father pissed away more than I could've imagined. He really was a failure in this respect. Today, both my parents (very sad to say) are miserable wretches and like Star I do hold some resentment towards them both.....they could have been so much more if they didn't spend all of thier time trying to fuck each other for the cruel acts they perpetrated against one another - us kids caught in the middle. To some degree my girls are kind of experiencing this, but the difference is I am working hard to change our future.....my parents did NOT.

Dutch, a PHD?! Damn, I feel like a loser. I must say that my parents did not support my (or my sister's) going to college. They also had the working class mentality. My sister moved out, put herself through college and though she is now a stay-at-home mommy, she is much happier as she had the balls to stand on her own two feet, unafraid, and did WHAT SHE wanted to do.

I left college (though I did really well in school) and got married because I didn't believe that I could ever really be all that I wanted and partially to escape my parent's house (I stayed at home even though I got a decent scholarship to St John's U where I could've spent my junior year abroad in Budapest - I was afraid that I would not be able to "find" the money to come up with the rest of the tuition.....again, my failure because I didn't believe in myself.).

I may have found my balls later in life, but at least I found them.......you on the other hand, have HYUGE BALLS! Hats off to you!!!!

 

[Imnotdutch]

BM,
Just a couple of quick points.....

1)I thought thats what you meant by "off the boat". I just have problems with some of the US phrases sometimes.

2)Almost everybody thinks that their parents fail in some respect. My dad has prob lost tens of thousands of pounds over the last ten years.....but I refuse to waste my time thinking about how it could have been.

3)Why do you feel like a loser? You have 4 beautiful daughters and you are doing your absolute best for them. If that is the true definition of loser then I wish there were more "losers" in this world. I hope you werent even remotely serious when you said that (I have a hard time telling when americans are joking too!).

4)A degree doesnt make you a better person than anybody else.....even though some people would like to think it does.....and a Ph.D isn't that tough to get (unless you actually listen to those people that like to use it to make you feel inferior).

5)As far as leaving university goes.....I'm sure that you made the right decision at the time....and you seem to have turned out pretty well considering you are a "loser"

 

[absolute hardgainer]

I grew up poor, which wasn't a lot of fun back then. But it did teach me to value what little you have got and to make the most out of it. Now, I know people who still can't make ends meet even though they earn 250k a year, haha.

hardgainer (!)

 

[tripleV]

grew up poor also, my mother and two kids. however, trying to live better myself now that i'm older and can take responsibility for my own life. i do have lots of huge debt though as i did go to graduate school by way of financial debts for life. but i can be proud that everything i've accomplished has been solely the efforts of me wanting to achieve it and going after it.

 

[vixenbabe]

I'm curious about something....

How many of you people who have" money"/special skills give back to your community?

My family has money. Nothing was handed over to me without me earning it . They taught me to value and respect what I earned. That is more than I can say for the kids now a days..... TAKE , TAKE , TAKE!

I want to know if anyone who has/had the means, gives anything back to their community?

I happen to be involved with a fantastic women's shelter in my town. I give them 20 hours a month going over their books. ALL FREE!

This thread made me sad in a lot of ways!

 

[Bikini Mod]

Dutch....I know that I am not a loser (I have to keep reminding myself!). It is only an expression to let you know how much I think of what you and others like you have accomplished. In the future, instead of putting myself down, I will do just that - let people know how much I think of them WITHOUT feeling the need to tear myself down.

I know, I know.....self-esteem issues. Believe me, I am working very hard to undo all the negativity that has been fed me since I was very young.

Thank you for your kind words. It greatly helps!

I think you will be a fine teacher and your future students will be very fortunate to have someone like you positively influencing them when their parents will be sending them "don't even TRY to be more than you are" signals. Most will fall by the wayside, but the few who excel will undoubtedly be eternally grateful.

I respect you tremendously.

 

[RyanH]

Again, money brings just as many problems as being poor does. I've always been able to ask my parents for whatever I want, and have, in return, usually gotten it.

But, look at what this does to your relationship. My parents often substitute money for love. Also, you'll find other people often substituting money for love. It doesn't work. Problems flow on and on for every dollar that is spent. Your problems will always be there, whereever you go, no matter how much you spend.

All that is required is enough money to live comfortably. Anything more than that is pointless. Money is a part of what's wrong with this country to begin with.

We have forgotten life's other values---good food, art, culture, literature...........

THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE....