Annoying People in the Gym

[skydancer]

BWAHAAAA - there are SOOOO many of the "frat boys with ICS at my gym its hysterical!!! Especially in the afternoons...don't have a napolean that I know of but some pretty damn close to it.

There is a team of guys who show up at the gym every day and never never never work legs...what would you classify those chicken wings as?

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Patience is a bitter plant, but it has sweet fruit.
Well done is better than well said.

 

[MarlaSinger]

There is an exotic species of pencil neck known as the "tank-top Faber Castell". This pencil neck is very shy about displaying his pathetically small quadraceps. He hides his emaciated stems beneath designer wind pants at all times. Some subspecies of this breed hide their legs within the folds of 1980s baggy "clown pants". The "tank-top faber-castell" is predisposed to developing ILS, and he is excessively proud of his 13 inch biceps. Because of the severity of his condition, the TTFC will compensate for his pathetic lower body development by performing between 84 and 150 sets of bench press(half reps) and bicep curls. Many TTFC are also under the impression that they are "gangsters" and will wear $.30 gold chains and display the elastic of their designer boxer shorts while developing their truly massive upper bodies.

 

[riptchick]

LOL @ Marla....you just described everyone at my gym. Funny stuff. We should think about opening an Elite Fitness Women's Board Gym--centrally located of course.

It could be closed to the public.

Lockers with our handles engraved. Nice touch.

Dumbells for even IG, Lobo and all the heavy hitters.

CHALK everywhere.

Squat racks galore. Actual squat racks not a row of smith machines.

Grunting from women encouraged.

No pansy music.

and most importantly none of the peeps ya'll described.

 

[luv2workout]

LOL @ Marla! That was too funny! Loved the ICS - imaginary chest syndrome..Im gonna have to remember that one!

Its so funny that we are all so far apart from each other, but it seems as if you guys are always describing MY gym!!!

 

[Fennec]

You're killing me with this thread.... don't stop!! Too TOO funny!!! My husband and I had an experience with a dude that put his towels on equipment, then walked away and chit-chatted elsewhere. We tried to be polite and asked if we could work in, but NO WAY, he was USING the equipment, he said. That gym also had really funky sweat-laden carpet. Luckily, we moved to a different state.

 

[Molly Malone]

Ms. Singer, you are the greatest! I get to avoid most of those people because I work out between 6 & 9 am, only us junkies are there that early. But if I work out in the afternoon- there they are. What would you call someone who is constantly moving equipment around? We seem to have that problem when we walk in in the morning and everything has been rearranged. Pisses me off, esp. when they move the preacher bench to face away from the mirror. Hey, I am pround of those bi's, and want to see them work!

Anyhow, I don't know if this certainly counts directly as annoying, but it certainly got my goat. So yesterday was Molly's worldwide chest day, and since I started a mass cycle, I was playing aournd with the weights to see where my %s are, etc. And this woman walks by, mentally adds up my weights on the bench press, and tells me "I would love to be that strong."

So there I was feeling pretty darn proud of myself, when she said....

"Only without so much muscle."

I thought that my partner was going to wet his pants.

Later,

Molly

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For the warrior, no excuses; for the victim, only excuses.

 

[TEXASAMM]

ahhhh Molly,
I get that too but it's "I would love to be your size BUT with out those stretchmarks." I tell them "Well I don't think you have anything to worry about there"

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SAMM
<A HREF="http://anabolicfitness.infopop.net" TARGET=_blank>

</A>The Other Board.

 

[skydancer]

Some people just don't think before they open their yap. I had a fat girl tell me the other day in the locker room "thin people shouldn't be allowed to walk around" (I was wearing my pants and a bra at the time blow drying my hair) I had to bite my tongue in two so I wouldn't say "fat people shouldn't be allowed to walk around" (She was wearing the same outfit as me) This is the same fat girl who said "if I lift heavy I get absolutely ripped and huge" This girl hasn't seen a muscle in her freaken life!!

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Patience is a bitter plant, but it has sweet fruit.
Well done is better than well said.

 

[Future One]

I just spent the last half hour laughing here!! i like the ICS bit the best!!!

But the ones that piss me off the most are the fat fucking asses that think they are "big", you know the ones 50" chest, 50" waist, 18" arms but no definition whatsoever.

I REALLY hate how the general public can see these fat pieces of shit as "intimidating" it's pathetic!!

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"Mr. Phillips, are you honestly telling me that people are really going to believe that I'm the 'before,' and he's the 'after'?"

Johnny had spent the best years of his life there, playing with the other children, running, laughing, and experiencing the wonders of nature through innocent eyes. He even sneaked his first kiss there from Becky Thompson while standing underneath the slide, so there was no way in hell he was going to let CostCo put another store on "his" playground.

 

[MarlaSinger]

The gym is home to many rare species of homo-sapiens, one of the most impressive, yet very common, is known as "Das Wunderkind". DW is not just a fine physical specimen, he is a GENIUS at his craft. He has built his powerful, awe-inspiring physique by way of revolutionary exercise tecniques. These techniques include the one-legged smith machine squat. On one occassion, I witnessed DW performing this movement with exceptional grace while simultaneously scratching his testicles. It was breathtaking.
It is important to note that DW is very territorial. He will mark his territory by carefully placing one of his many gym towels upon a piece of equipment, by profusely sweating upon it, or both.
However, what is even more impressive is his mating ritual. Whenever females enter the immediate vicinity of Das Wunderkind, he will puff his chest out, begin yelling very loudly about asinine topics, and scream as if he is vacating a particularly painful bowel movement during each and every "rep" that he performs. DW will also display his masculine dominance by asking potential mates if they need help stripping down their weight while wearing a shit-eating grin on his face.

-Marla Singer