thebabydoc said:
AAP: Exactly how old are you???
I hate to say this because I really think you are a pretty cool guy but the level of "conceit" expressed heretofor not only surpasses Narcissus' but really doesn't bode well for your likelihood of ever finding someone who will "measure up" to you. It also makes you sound pretty immature.
Did you ever stop to think that maybe those men were all pretty shallow, empty, and easily satisfied and that you deliberately choose these types of partners to keep feeding your ever-expanding ego and continue your self-fulfilling fantasy of what a treasure you are to this world?
Just a little thought to creep in your head and help you go limp the next time you're anally violating your next "toy".
I am 28.
Of course it sounded narcisstic and vain. But it is 100% true. I can honestly say that I have NEVER picked a man to date because of what I could get. I have picked them based 90% on my physical attraction to them. I stayed with them because of intellectual attraction. I have never asked anyone I ever dated for anything. As a matter of fact, 2 of those men were men I would have carried on my back every step for the rest of my life. They were in no position to give me anything. One was a struggling artist, the other in the service. I was the one who paid for our European vacations, our premier theater tickets, and our living expenses. I truly loved each and every one of those men at the time for WHO they were and never for WHAT they offered. When offered these things, I always refused to accept them. Only after they insisted did I. These men (with exception to the artist) were mostly all very succesful, highly educated and well cultured. These men were NOT easily satisfied, hence the reason they were single when I met them and still single today. It was that when I came along, I possessed the body, the face, the education, the experience, the intellectual maturity, the culture, etc.. that they were all seeking and found desireable. In every relationship I have been in, I was/am always the GIVER. These men gave in their own way. Their way was not my way. I could give in their way when comparing dollar to dollar. But it was not an expense, a cost, or a value of what they gave that mattered to me or them. They truly gave from the heart. These men actually did "measure up" to the standards that I impose upon my partners. Actually, all except one. And he lied about those. The standards I require are Honest, Loyalty, and Respect. Never a monetary or social standing issue. I have loved and shared my life from the struggling artist, to an Air Force pilot, to the blue blood nobility of England. These relationships never had any expectations or ideals imposed upon them. I am I, they were they. Nothing more required.
My current BF, while quite successful was not chosen because of his monetary value. How could I possibly know anything about his finances or gifts two years ago when I met him? I met him on the beach, you can't exactly carry your net worth portfolio around in your Speedo and whip it out when needed can you? Instead what attracted me to him was his looks (as I said physical attraction is 90% of the bait to get my interest), his smile, his easy going laugh, and the fact that the 30 minutes he was on my blanket talking, I felt so much at ease. There was no pressure, no pretense, his culture mannerisms were perfect. It was like talking to someone I had known for years. His body language was completely comfortable, no sign of the nervous tension you get when meeting someone for the first time. He showed up in a Beetle on the first date. (maid's car - he did this to keep himself low key in the beginning) I didn't care obviously because I called him again to ask him out again the next day. We dated for two months spending time at my house, never his. He said he had a jealous roommate (he did not lie, it was a Doberman). I had no idea of what his finances were like until AFTER I had told him I loved him. After that he invited me on an Intercoastal cruise (big deal) that he had tickets for. Other than the crew, we were the only two on the boat. He then told me "by the way, this is my boat." Next he pointed at a house and said "and that is where I live" Thinking he was bullshitting, I waited until we got in the house and called his home number from my cell phone and the phone inside rang. Up to that point and from that point afterwards, I had never cared what he had to offer to "compensate" me for my time.
I am not a leech or a mooch or freeloader or gold digger. I am simply myself. Because I conduct myself in ways that there are no secrets about me, this is why I normally attract a different breed of men than what your gay stereo type may be.
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