bottom line is Im really not proud that I did it, I regret it, Ive not been myself for about 5 weeks, too much shit went on that had me down and reeling and I got to the point where I just said "fuck it, I don't care" with that attitude in hand I stopped wrrying about things, just acted and didn't think, ignored thinking, I felt like I would never find a strong connection again with someone for a cvery long time so hell with it Ill get it someday but there is no point of waiting, it was all about fun and doing what I thought would make me happy..any way you look at it, I did it, I can't go back, so time to move on, I don't even know if I really want to be in a relationship, I want to see her, I like her, but I don't hink Im ready for anything real serious