Worst thing during sex

[Sebby]

What is the worst thing you have ever said, or been told during sex?

 

[Sebby]

Here comes the obvious jokes about guys with underage girls. Anyway, Maxim had a list which was pretty funny. It included stuff like,

Guy takes off his pants and his girl responds, "one sec, let me get my glasses," or girl responds buy saying, "oh look how litte and cute it is."

What do you guys/girls got. I bet you can top that.

Lets hear it.

 

[jerseyart]

Best thing:" You're going to put all of that in me! No way, I'm too small." (and yeah she was 24 assholes)


Worst thing. (right after sex, not a gf) "Don't be mad, but I had sex with Eric (my best friend) last night

 

[Upper-cruster]

"ist it in yet"

 

[jerseyart]

Worst thing during sex.

Back in college my best friend was transferring to UCLA, so we decided to have a send off. I called this girl in Wehhawken, cute petite red head, that I met at a bar and she was good to go. So were both on the phone asking her if she has a pretty friend that she can bring along for him. She says yeah, and he is like "are you sure she's pretty", and the girls swearing up and down that she is. So they get there and sure enough her friend is hurtin. So my buddy starts to make a scene, and I have to ask to be excused so we could talk in the hall. He starts yelling, "There is no fucking way I'm going to sleep with her!" We're standing just outside the door, so for sure the girls can hear him yell.

So I'm like "Just calm the fuck down, you can have the redhead" which was a major bummer, but it was his send off. So now I'm pissy and I grab the ugly chick and say "Cmon, lets go hang in my room" and he stays there with the redhead. So I figure we'll just hang in my room for an hour or so, because there is no way I'm sleeping with her either. But she starts getting aggressive, and telling me "don't be shy, it's ok I'll be gentle" So now my pride is on the line, and I have to screw this chick just to prove I can, or else she'll be talking shit to people we know (I don't know her, but she knows some of the same people).

So I get it over with, and head to the bathroom to take a leak. I get there, and my hand feels sticky. I look down and there is blood all over me. I fucking screamed like a girl, because the first thing that pops into my mind is that she cut me. There was that much blood. Then in two seconds I figure out what it is, and that's almost as bad, especially since it was her. So I shower off.

When we get back downstairs my bud is all like "that is the best piece of ass I ever had. She was fucking incredible. The second we closed the door she was....." The fucker

 

[Y_lifter]

Hi Daddy ... When did you all get home ?

 

[Deleted member 33117]

Worst thing during sex.

Back in college my best friend was transferring to UCLA, so we decided to have a send off. I called this girl in Wehhawken, cute petite red head, that I met at a bar and she was good to go. So were both on the phone asking her if she has a pretty friend that she can bring along for him. She says yeah, and he is like "are you sure she's pretty", and the girls swearing up and down that she is. So they get there and sure enough her friend is hurtin. So my buddy starts to make a scene, and I have to ask to be excused so we could talk in the hall. He starts yelling, "There is no fucking way I'm going to sleep with her!" We're standing just outside the door, so for sure the girls can hear him yell.

So I'm like "Just calm the fuck down, you can have the redhead" which was a major bummer, but it was his send off. So now I'm pissy and I grab the ugly chick and say "Cmon, lets go hang in my room" and he stays there with the redhead. So I figure we'll just hang in my room for an hour or so, because there is no way I'm sleeping with her either. But she starts getting aggressive, and telling me "don't be shy, it's ok I'll be gentle" So now my pride is on the line, and I have to screw this chick just to prove I can, or else she'll be talking shit to people we know (I don't know her, but she knows some of the same people).

So I get it over with, and head to the bathroom to take a leak. I get there, and my hand feels sticky. I look down and there is blood all over me. I fucking screamed like a girl, because the first thing that pops into my mind is that she cut me. There was that much blood. Then in two seconds I figure out what it is, and that's almost as bad, especially since it was her. So I shower off.

When we get back downstairs my bud is all like "that is the best piece of ass I ever had. She was fucking incredible. The second we closed the door she was....." The fucker

hyahaha... dude I have had to play wingman before also... it sucks, but the guy owes you next time. Good story though.

 

[awittyusername]

Worst thing. (right after sex, not a gf) "Don't be mad, but I had sex with Eric (my best friend) last night

Dude, you told her you had sex w/your best friend Eric the night before? Bad move

 

[jerseyart]

Dude, you told her you had sex w/your best friend Eric the night before? Bad move

Ass monkey

 

[Evil_Frisky]

Best thing:" You're going to put all of that in me! No way, I'm too small." (and yeah she was 24 assholes)