Whats the stupidest thing you have seen at your gym

[billyburg]

This was some funny shit. It had me rolling. Is this for real? It sounds like some shit out of a movie?

I was hoping that this thread was still here. This just happened this morning. My side is still hurting from laughing so hard. THANK GOD, no one was hurt....... Here goes.......


I am in the back row in the cardio section of my gym doing my 30 minutes on the stair stepper. You know, the big one that stands way above all the other machines. It's 6 a.m. and the gym is freaking packed! It looks like a Monday afternoon at 6 p.m. obviously, all the "new years resolution" people are here to put their 3 weeks in.

In walk a couple of newbees. Brand new workout clothes. Both in their mid 30's, I'd guess. He heads off to the locker room, and she walks over to the magazine rack. After about 5 minutes of uncertainty of what to do, they both decide to get on the tread mills right in front of me. I'm watching the news, so I'm not really paying too much attention to everything that’s happening.... About 5 minutes go by.

All of a sudden, I hear a boom and I see the guy slip on the treadmill. It's like I'm watching this in slow motion. His legs go out from underneath him. He manages to grab the handlebar on the front of the tread mill and is hanging on like someone hanging on to the bumper of a car going 30 miles an hour. His legs are flailing around trying to get some footing and WHAM, the treadmill grabs the bottom of his sweat pants and off they come!! At this point, I'm laughing so hard, I'm tripping on the steps trying to stay on top of the machine to watch. All this while, his wife is just walking on her machine, watching, not knowing what to do. Once he realizes that his pants are off, panic sets in and he grabs for his wife’s hand. She reaches out to grab it, catches his hand and as he lets go of the machine, the running treadmill drags him off, and drags her diagonally across the side bars of her machine, catching her top and lifting it, along with her bra, right over her freaking head. They both land in a pile on the floor, right in front of my machine, him with no pants on, and her with her top and bra wrapped over the top of her head.

I’m laughing so hard at this point that off I go, right on my ass and into the wall behind me. By the time I caught my breath, all I saw was their ass ends, heading out the front door.

My ass is sore from landing on it, but today is chest day for me.

 

[Stapled to the Floor]

A guy around 45 y/o or so was in pretty good shape.. He constantly did tricep dips with feet/legs on bench, 45 on lap, and hands on this rickety old chair that was falling apart... nobody else used the chair.. only this dumbass... then of course one day the chair broke and just lacerated his forearm wide open.. had to have surgical repair.. the fucker sued the gym and they acutally settled out with him... And to top it off he still comes in their.. the fucking nerve!!..Every time I see him I want to slap him.......and his lawyer....

 

[Golden_Muscle]

To come to think of it, the stupidist thing I have ever seen at the gym are little guys.

No offence to the little guys, but some of you gotta stop thinking you are a nutrition analyists + pro bb's + pro trainers. If you were I think you would look different than what you look like.

When I say little guys I mean roughly, 5'9, 155lbs. Go eat some food, never mind working out.

 

[Dr.M]

one day the chair broke and just lacerated his forearm wide open.. had to have surgical repair.. the fucker sued the gym and they acutally settled out with him... And to top it off he still comes in their.. the fucking nerve!!..Every time I see him I want to slap him.......and his lawyer....

In all fairness, it sounds like he was stupid to use the chair, and the gym was RETARDED to leave it on site!

 

[dillinger]

there are these two soccer kids and this girl that have this guy taht coaches them when they lift. They have the same routine every day. Bench squats ( where you squat down on the bench to make sure you go parallel) and they dont even touch the fuckin thing, then they move on to wrist curls (this is where the coach joins them and does some sets with them) and they do these with dumbbells and take up every bench in the dumbbell area when doin these wrist curls. Then they move on to pylometrics like jumping up stairs and jumping on benches (at least they dont this in the actual weight room they do it by the basketball courts). That is the routine every day. Bench squats, wrist curls and pylo and they do this for soccer. It's so rediculous watchin the guy coach them the whole time too. They come in there with clipboards and journals (nothing wrong with that) but its just stupid when they do the same shit every day. Its ludacris.

 

[dillinger]

sorry about postin twice in a row but someone reminded me of somthing. There is this guy who does bench every day and his range of motion cracks my ass up. He puts 315 on and he seriously does about 1/8 of a rep every time. He does what he thinks is sets of ten but i dont think he can even max the shit. I dont know what hes tryin to accomplish but oh well.

 

[stimpy]

I dont know about retards in the gym, but lately there has been this one hot ass girl that keeps distracting me in the gym. In my gym the hammer strengths are right next to the stretching area and it seems like everytime I am over there she has to come over there and start stretching. She doesn't just do normal stretches either,for instance she will turn her back to me, bend over grab her ankles and start moving back and forth in a "fuck me" like motion and then turn around and give me a big smile. Everytime she does it I pop wood and have to quickly move so she doesnt see it. Makes for an interesting work out but really distracts the fuck out of me. I know this doesn't really fit in ths thread but thats the only out of the ordinary gym story I have.

There's this one guy in my gym that walks around with a boner all the time. we think he's hilarious.

 

[stimpy]

hmmm ...sounds like GHB.LOL

anyone ever G out at the gym,or see someone else G out?

Saw this dude yesterday G out in mid conversation.Past right the fuck out.It was kinda funny,Except for the people who were totally oblivious to what was really going on.People were kinda scared.

When I was a trainer at Gold's my boss used to sell Furanone, just like GHB, he fell asleep trying to get the key into his office door, which is right in the front of the gym. He's standing there with his head up against the door, passed out, doing that jerking motion. I left the fucker there for about ten minutes. I thought it was hilarious.

 

[musketeer]

bump on this one

 

[Cabra]

Stupidest Thing Ever !

Without a doubt: Cell Phones in the Gym !