The One

[PHATchik]

Do you believe in "The One"? I was flipping through channles and found some movie where this guy is debating whether or not "The One" actually exists for each person. One dude said that the concept is basically just a big black hole that people fall into. What do you all think? Is "The One" just this huge idea that people get to make themselves feel better, or is there actually a "The One"?

 

[vinylgroover]

No, there are many.

It just depends on what stage and circumstance of your life you find yourself. The person you may have found and married at 20 could be totally different to the person you find at say 30, because you are at a different stage of your life.

 

[AAP]

Yes.

There is The One who is bad for you (I already had him... sigh...) and then there is The One who is good for you (I got him now.)

 

[PHATchik]

Yes.

There is The One who is bad for you (I already had him... sigh...) and then there is The One who is good for you (I got him now.)

Wouldn't that imply that there are The Two?

 

[The Whole F/N Show]

I will be The One.

 

[AAP]

Wouldn't that imply that there are The Two?

Nope. Just one. Depending on which sie of the yin yang you fall upon.

 

[big_bad_buff]

 

[Daisy_Girl]

No, there are many.

It just depends on what stage and circumstance of your life you find yourself. The person you may have found and married at 20 could be totally different to the person you find at say 30, because you are at a different stage of your life.

Well said, couldn't have said it better myself.

 

[Sinistar]

any woman who beleives in the one PM me. you wouldnt beleive what kind of life i have for us.

 

[easton104]

more like one a month, then they get boring...even the worlds greatest movie gets boring if you watch it everyday

 

[Taps]

No, there are many.

It just depends on what stage and circumstance of your life you find yourself. The person you may have found and married at 20 could be totally different to the person you find at say 30, because you are at a different stage of your life.

Well, what about couples who stay together for life? How do they manage, huh?

I know what you mean though, and that's pretty much my stance on things also.

 

[Paulos]

I don't believe in "The one" unless it's "The one of many"...

 

[easton104]

I used to believe in 'the one' but that only led to me feeling the most horrible pain i could ever imagine...so now i prefer single servings of affection, just need somebody to scratch my back once in a while and a warm snuggly bum on a cold night and im a happy camper, i could care less who it is half the time

 

[PHATchik]

Well, what about couples who stay together for life? How do they manage, huh?

I know what you mean though, and that's pretty much my stance on things also.

Bah humbug.

 

[PHATchik]

Actually, I've got my own views on this whole little concept too. It's kinda pessimistic though, so I'll just plead the 5th.

 

[big_bad_buff]

more like one a month, then they get boring...even the worlds greatest movie gets boring if you watch it everyday

 

[easton104]

There are some people who are so fundamentally flawed by design, there is no way they could possibly be 'the one' for anybody, i am sure we all know people like this...so to say there is 'the one' for everybody, this must mean that everybody must also be capable of being 'the one' for somebody else, and i dont think that flies

 

[jubei]

paulos your avatar started to hypnotise me. has this happened to anyone else.

 

[Paulos]

Yes because it's happened, but I've only told the story once in my life and I'm not repeating it here.

Come on now Broly, lets have some heart to heart male bonding. Open up to me, I am your shoulder to cry on.

 

[Mad4Iron]

No,people change too damn much.

The "One" can turn into your worst nightmare in a couple of years.

Mad

 

[DUSTY]

Do you believe in "The One"? I was flipping through channles and found some movie where this guy is debating whether or not "The One" actually exists for each person. One dude said that the concept is basically just a big black hole that people fall into. What do you all think? Is "The One" just this huge idea that people get to make themselves feel better, or is there actually a "The One"?

YOU'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT MOVIE CALLED THE ONE WITH JET LI ARE YOU?

 

[atlantabiolab]

Do you believe in "The One"? I was flipping through channles and found some movie where this guy is debating whether or not "The One" actually exists for each person. One dude said that the concept is basically just a big black hole that people fall into. What do you all think? Is "The One" just this huge idea that people get to make themselves feel better, or is there actually a "The One"?

There is no "soul mate" if that is what you mean, a person who was somehow predestined to be your partner in life. Man, being a contractual animal, finds one who meets his/her criteria for partner and decides to oblige himself to the other. Man has decided that monogamous relations are superior to non-monogamous relations, in regards to child-rearing and personal happiness.

 

[PHATchik]

No, I was not referring to the movie with Jet Li, God forbid.

And I'm not sure anymore what I think. I think that there our future is already mapped out for us. That may pertain to our job, our life, or even that person that may be waiting for us down the road. I kinda like to think that the person that we are meant to be with (if we are meant to be with someone) is simply waiting for us to pop up and say here we are.

 

[biteme]

Well if there is only "One". You've got about a 1 in several million chance of finding that one.

 

[PHATchik]

Well if there is only "One". You've got about a 1 in several million chance of finding that one.

Such a comforting thought hun. Really.

 

[biteme]

Such a comforting thought hun. Really.

Here's a few weird coincidences for you. Only because there's so many of them. My first date with my ex was on my deceased grandmother's b-day. We were very close. My first true love, who I still think about to this day admitted to me that she had slept with another person b4 me. She was crying, telling me the story (faking, I'm sure). She said her boyfriend left her for another girl because this girl would have sex with him all the time and she wouldn't. I live in a town of about 40,000. 6 years later the girl I end up dating and marrying was the girl my first love was talking about. Merely by chance, I find it very odd though. I've seen a lot of very strange coincidences in my life that makes me wonder if something is not going on behind the scenes. My ex's grandmother recently passed away and the tombstone next to her's was a little boys with the same last name as mine. Not a common name. I visited an elderly woman in a nursing home because she asked me to. We had went on Christmas to visit the sick. My grandmother had died 15 years earlier, I was very close to her, but had never been to visit her burial site. One day, I was lying on the sofa at home and a thought popped into my head to go and visit her burial site. A very large cemetary in the heart of Dallas. I walked into the office to ask where her plot was. At this time, there was another family in the office. When I repeated the name of my grandmother, they said that their grandfather had the same last name. Later, I found out that their grandfather and my grandfather were brothers. I had to go there at exactly that time for that to occur and that thought just popped into my head after 15 years? The next thing that happened was shocking. As I drove around looking for my Granny's plot, I eventually found it and when I looked at the first tombstone that I saw it was the old lady's from the nursing home. Her place was reserved. It was in the same plot as my Granny's and one row over and nearly directly across. That happened on August 24. I went back to visit the old lady from time to time. She had Alzheimer's. I prayed for her to die because I knew she was suffering. I didn't know if God existed. (Still don't, being honest). She did die, on August 24, one year from the day that I visited the cemetary. There are several more coincidences that happened that ties in with these but it would take several pages. Crazy stuff. I tell you, there is something out there bigger than us.

 

[out_at_sea]

Do you believe in "The One"? I was flipping through channles and found some movie where this guy is debating whether or not "The One" actually exists for each person. One dude said that the concept is basically just a big black hole that people fall into. What do you all think? Is "The One" just this huge idea that people get to make themselves feel better, or is there actually a "The One"?

Pygmalion has the answer...if "the one"is far fetched !

 

[biteme]

Oh yeah, something about me and tombstones. I went to one of my best friend's mother's funerals last year. As the line of cars was driving to the burial site, the lead car made a wrong turn. Everyone got out to try and figure out where to go. My friend pointed straight ahead and said, "Look." The tombstone directly in front of us had the same last name as mine. Again, not a common name.

 

[Toozee]

My parents: married 28 years
Seen emotional expression....but never seen em fight.
When not at work, usually hanging out together, sometimes doing their own thing in different corners of the house.
"Happy couple"
Mom's parents: married 60 years-Always together
Dad's parents: married 65 years-Always together

All these couples in my life are very happy. After I got older....I could see it in their eyes even.....no matter how old they were, they still look at each other with genuine admiration, along with a deeper connection.

Myself, been with same person last 5 years, married 3.
Never argue. There's things each may wish the other didnt do quite so often, but it's not that big of a deal.
(We're pretty considerate of each other anyway)
So,for me. Yes.

 

[out_at_sea]

My parents: married 28 years
Seen emotional expression....but never seen em fight.
When not at work, usually hanging out together, sometimes doing their own thing in different corners of the house.
"Happy couple"
Mom's parents: married 60 years-Always together
Dad's parents: married 65 years-Always together

All these couples in my life are very happy. After I got older....I could see it in their eyes even.....no matter how old they were, they still look at each other with genuine admiration, along with a deeper connection.

Myself, been with same person last 5 years, married 3.
Never argue. There's things each may wish the other didnt do quite so often, but it's not that big of a deal.
(We're pretty considerate of each other anyway)
So,for me. Yes.

You must be THE ONE...

 

[PHATchik]

My parents: married 28 years
Seen emotional expression....but never seen em fight.
When not at work, usually hanging out together, sometimes doing their own thing in different corners of the house.
"Happy couple"
Mom's parents: married 60 years-Always together
Dad's parents: married 65 years-Always together

All these couples in my life are very happy. After I got older....I could see it in their eyes even.....no matter how old they were, they still look at each other with genuine admiration, along with a deeper connection.

Myself, been with same person last 5 years, married 3.
Never argue. There's things each may wish the other didnt do quite so often, but it's not that big of a deal.
(We're pretty considerate of each other anyway)
So,for me. Yes.

I've seen my grandparents married 57 years. They fight, but they absolutely love each other. That's what I want to find, if it's out there for me. I want that love that can just surpass everything. I see lots of couples that don't work out, my parents included. But then I see my grandparents, and I know it can work. BTW, I don't mind the fighting. It's fun.

 

[HumorMe]

I've seen my grandparents married 57 years. They fight, but they absolutely love each other. That's what I want to find, if it's out there for me. I want that love that can just surpass everything. I see lots of couples that don't work out, my parents included. But then I see my grandparents, and I know it can work. BTW, I don't mind the fighting. It's fun.

It's out there. You just have to be willing to accept someone for their positive and negative traits.

We live in a very selfish society. People tend to get caught up in the here and now and never look at things long term or the effects to their actions. We are moving towards a "no blame", "it's not my fault" attitude in today's behaviour.

It's easier to cast blame on something or somebody else rather then take the blame ourselves. It's called being spineless.

Being happy with just one person is the greatest sacrifice you will ever make. Love simply means loving someone more than you love yourself.

It's worked for me for 21 years (15 years married). We seldom have disagreements and we just enjoy each other so much. It's all about giving more and taking less.

 

[out_at_sea]

It's out there. You just have to be willing to accept someone for their positive and negative traits.

We live in a very selfish society. People tend to get caught up in the here and now and never look at things long term or the effects to their actions. We are moving towards a "no blame", "it's not my fault" attitude in today's behaviour.

It's easier to cast blame on something or somebody else rather then take the blame ourselves. It's called being spineless.

Being happy with just one person is the greatest sacrifice you will ever make. Love simply means loving someone more than you love yourself.

It's worked for me for 21 years (15 years married). We seldom have disagreements and we just enjoy each other so much. It's all about giving more and taking less.

I am the selfish one who gives LESS and takes MORE....Who told you that life is fair?

 

[HumorMe]

I am the selfish one who gives LESS and takes MORE....Who told you that life is fair?

Life is never fair. Life is hard work. How you handle life is your signature, meaning you are either a "hold em and stay in the game" type or a "fold em and watch the game" type. You can't be both.

 

[PHATchik]

It's out there. You just have to be willing to accept someone for their positive and negative traits.

We live in a very selfish society. People tend to get caught up in the here and now and never look at things long term or the effects to their actions. We are moving towards a "no blame", "it's not my fault" attitude in today's behaviour.

It's easier to cast blame on something or somebody else rather then take the blame ourselves. It's called being spineless.

Being happy with just one person is the greatest sacrifice you will ever make. Love simply means loving someone more than you love yourself.

It's worked for me for 21 years (15 years married). We seldom have disagreements and we just enjoy each other so much. It's all about giving more and taking less.

I agree. You should accept people for both their negative and positive traits. Sometimes, you even have to accept the fact that they may not agree with you on things, even important things. I agree that we live in a selfish society. I think that we are not willing to give on subjects. Compromise and molding ourselves is something that a lot of us don't do.

And also, I think that loving someone is a huge sacrifice. You have to be willing to open yourself and accept things, whether you want to or not. And yes, you have to be willing to love that person more than yourself. When you can open yourself and your heart to a person, you know that you have something special. And when you love that person more than yourself, you know that it is definitely something special.

 

[HumorMe]

And also, I think that loving someone is a huge sacrifice. You have to be willing to open yourself and accept things, whether you want to or not. And yes, you have to be willing to love that person more than yourself. When you can open yourself and your heart to a person, you know that you have something special. And when you love that person more than yourself, you know that it is definitely something special.

This seems to be the biggest obstacle facing people in relationships. People are not confident enough to just release that fear. Kind of like receiving a present and not knowing what is inside. Do you open it and reveal the contents and the possibly of being disappointed or do you put it aside and show no interest.

Until they learn to let their guard down and accept someone, they will never find someone to love.

 

[ANABOLICK1]

The truth is there is no 'one' perfect mate for us. There are a lot of good potential partners out there for all of us, but I believe we all eventually 'settle' with someone to some degree. No one is perfect.

 

[gymtime]

The truth is there is no 'one' perfect mate for us. There are a lot of good potential partners out there for all of us, but I believe we all eventually 'settle' with someone to some degree. No one is perfect.

Exactly. The idea of "the one" or "the perfect mate" is myth which people waste years of their lives trying to catch. The fact is, we'd all be lucky to find someone who can tolerate us...the rest is frosting.

 

[out_at_sea]

It is plain lottery; if you happen to be the lucky winner, more power to you!

BTW< I am a gambler!

 

[staw]

Yes, I believe in "the one." I just located the most awesome vibrator.

 

[atlantabiolab]

And also, I think that loving someone is a huge sacrifice. You have to be willing to open yourself and accept things, whether you want to or not. And yes, you have to be willing to love that person more than yourself. When you can open yourself and your heart to a person, you know that you have something special. And when you love that person more than yourself, you know that it is definitely something special.

In rational love, you do not love the other person 'more' than yourself, simply you love yourself and this person has such value to your life that you cannot conceive of your life without the pleasure that this person provides you. The idea of life without this person is a life less valuable, so you are desiring of this person for selfish reasons. So in essence it is selfish to love, because you are in love with the effect this person has on your sense of life. And man will risk life and limb for those things which he loves, for they provide his life the value of living, and life without them is not worth living.