Proposing tonight!

[Strongbow]

Good, that gives you time to READ THE BOOK!

Look, remember one thing, going into sex with at least theoretical knowledge is NOT for YOUR SAKE, fuck you, you're a dude. Guaranteed no matter how badly it goes you'll still bust a nut and be over the moon. This is a woman you're literally making an eternal commitment to and if you do a piss poor job at introducing her to sex you've screwed both of you for eternity.

That's a lot of pressure man.

So start spelling the alphabet with your tongue and get to ordering off Amazon, chop-chop.

Jesus fuck woman don't make it so complicated for the poor guy. Just do what I do buffgay pull out your 9 inch veiny thick rod and pour the coal to that ass. I always bring my fuck kit in a Lil brown sammich bag. It has 1 xxl Trojan condom one clothes pin and a set of ear plugs. Put your condom on insert your ear plugs and clamp your nose with the clothes pin. I use this kit cause I hate to smell rubber burning and I can't stand to hear a women scream.

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[caligirl85]

Well when you put it like that...^^^

 

[cindylou]

sure it is, dude...that's a special moment...pre-broadcasting it to a bunch of nudniks on a steroid website that you've never met before is just kinda fucking odd...good thing it worked out for ya.

He was excited, he probably couldn't tell anyone else bc it might get back to her. Cut him some slack, geez. When I got pregnant with Abby I made a thread here on EF before I told my family bc I couldn't tell anyone yet, but wanted to tell someone.

 

[nydj66]

That's what I was thinking.

I am waiting for him to post and say he just found out she is a tranny.

Wut?

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[dabuffguy]

Good, that gives you time to READ THE BOOK!

Look, remember one thing, going into sex with at least theoretical knowledge is NOT for YOUR SAKE, fuck you, you're a dude. Guaranteed no matter how badly it goes you'll still bust a nut and be over the moon. This is a woman you're literally making an eternal commitment to and if you do a piss poor job at introducing her to sex you've screwed both of you for eternity.

That's a lot of pressure man.

So start spelling the alphabet with your tongue and get to ordering off Amazon, chop-chop.

This is good advice, I appreciate it.

But, as nerdvirg as I may seem, I'm not ignorant to this kind of stuff.

 

[hardrock]

This is good advice, I appreciate it.

But, as nerdvirg as I may seem, I'm not ignorant to this kind of stuff.

Real doll?

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[WoodyO]

Your palm is not a vag

 

[digimon7068]

She was in the restroom when I posted that.


Geez, off my back old man.

Electricity wasn't even invented when you were my age, let alone having something like this to post on.



People post questions, ask opinions, share this info about proposals online every day. Welcome to the 21st century you old fart.

i guess that since you purport to uphold all these other traditional (old-fashioned) values i was kind of taken aback by your less than traditional approach to your wedding proposal...maybe all that other stuff is bullshit too? you gonna post up before you dip your wick for the first time too?? fucking douche.

 

[WoodyO]

Lol

 

[WoodyO]

She was probably getting a quickie from a bus boy in the ladies room.