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You've spent a very long time crafting a very carefully constructed argument to justify yourself to a total stranger on the Internet. Unfortunately, I've run nearly as long as you, mainly because I'm procrastinating about getting to work.
You are like every other addict or any other person I've ever encountered who lives a deviant lifestyle (and please look up the definition of deviant, I'm using it in the classical sense as deviated from the norm). Everyone else is wrong, you're right and you will defend yourself to the last breath, arguing in endless circles, to prove that point. I will address a few specific points of this novel of a post you wrote:
The comment regarding "abuse of the doll" stems directly from your original post where you made several references to kinky and stated you have latex and bondage gear. I consider those things abuse as they fall under the realm of S&M. (The idea that pleasure = pain is for someone who grew up with too many contradictions in their life. I had no contradictions so for me pain hurts, pleasure feels great, end of story).
As for my husband's deepest, darkest fantasies, yes, I can honestly say what those are. But as you stated, I can't possibly understand what you demand of a relationship, by the same token, neither can you understand what we require of ours. Our relationship is literally sacred to us. There are no unopened doors, no secrets, no fears, no need of lying or manipulation that exists within so many relationships. We entered into our relationship having taken, literally, every physical, mental, psychological and emotional skeleton out of our respective closets and showing them to each other in the hopes of driving each other away. We don't need or desire the type of sexual relationship you're driven toward, because it's, frankly, boring and empty. You're driven to immediate sexual gratification on a physical level and you need to keep amping up the intensity of that physicality. When I make love with my husband our connection goes much further, deeper and broader than the mere physical act. We crawl into each other's skins and heads, so to speak. We each experience what the other is feeling. Until you've made love in a sacred relationship you can't understand it. You can't equate what my husband and I share to what you do to a piece of silicon, there is ZERO comparison. They don't even fall into similar categories. It's not comparing apples to oranges, it's comparing a symphony to concrete.
As for the addiction to intimacy comment, you've confused intimacy with orgasm.
Regarding your comment about men and their lust, you've got Strongbow right there saying the same thing I am. I'd like to add to his one comment about masturbation, at least when you masturbate you're having sex with someone (ideally) you love.
Finally, just because you're a sexual thrill seeker who thinks getting kinkier or "going to the bottom of the rabbit hole" is the penultimate sex and that's the only kind of woman you can be with, if you really believed that, there are PLENTY of ways to find women like that via the internet or in actual clubs. Women like that exist, you just don't want to really find one, because ultimately, you don't want to be with a real woman. If her drive was as "insatiable" (and kinky) as your own, you'd probably grow to despise her and yourself for having anything to do with her. You'd get bored with her. Sooner or later you'd have to hold a conversation and where would you be? Forced to face true intimacy and then you'd be in that place you really don't want to be in, forced to examine who you are and why you do what you do, why you want what you want.
So you tell yourself that there is no woman out there that could possibly match your drive and impulses, you tell yourself that any man if he truly opened himself up to who he was would be every bit as dark and deviated as you, and you tell yourself that you're healthy, your impulses are normal, just excessive, and you're totally open and utterly honest with yourself. I'm telling you it's a facade, as artificial as the woman you go home to at night.
True intimacy is having the courage to look someone you respect in the eye and face their judgement and they look right back and you and say "That doesn't change how much I love you."
You have found your niche and you are comfortable there. Good for you. I'm glad there are outlets and manufacturers who can fulfil your needs and desires. But desiring to remain in that niche, not trying to push beyond those boundaries and completely dismissing any question that maybe what you expect out of a relationship is unreasonable, right there tells me volumes.
BTW, just throwing this out there, I knew a young man who was married to a nympho when he was 21. After four months he was sick to death of having sex with her. He loved her dearly but got to the point where he was avoiding her. So even for young men, supposedly in their sexual prime, having sex 3x daily/365 gets to be a fucking bore. Wanting so much sex that any partner is annoyed with you is not normal and telling yourself it is normal is self-delusion.
That being said, I have to say (considering I collect abnormal human psychology as a hobby), you are intriguing. We have a guy who likes to shit on women's chests on this board, too. However, he, at least, has a sense of humor about his perversion.
