I'm not gay. But there's this really cute big huge black teddy bear bouncer at a club i go to. He's short but fat and big, and just the warmest of people. I always walk up to him and give him a BIIIGGGGGGG ol' hug and then give him a good smack on the shoulders. We all call him Bear cuz that's what he reminds us of. And he's so funny and cool.
So i guess i'm a non-sexual homosexual.
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