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Funny bouncing story...

J

John Woe

New member
I have been working in the clubs bouncing for years now. I have seen alot and done alot. But last night was another classic. To make a long story short(I know the type of attention span I'm working with here) Some kid sucker punched me for talking to his ex-girl. I did not know this at the time but found out later. I grabbed him up but when he started to wrestle with me I picked him up and dumped him to the ground. When I went to get up his boy starts kicking me. Another bouncer come back grabs that kid and I get up. I wanted to start booting this kid in the head but you have to watch what you do as a bouncer. So i decide to pick this kid up and put him in a choke hold. I didn't have it in all the way but it still only took about 30 seconds to put him out, sleeping like a baby. The whole time my boss and a cop are yelling let him go but I said fuck you he's going to pay first. When I let him go he fell to the ground like a wet noodle. I wanted so badly to take him outside and fuck him up but unfortunitly you can't so I always do the next best thing, put them to sleep. The whole time I'm whispering in his ear go to sleep my friend, sweet dreams. Believe me the last thing I want is confrontation when I'm working. I'd much rather just hang out and talk with girls and have a good time. That's why I get so pissed off when dudes have to be hard guys. I also hate when dudes can't be a man and square up instead they just take a blind side punch. This kid never did hurt me but that's not the point. Oh well, I guess I'm getting to old for this shit!!! Anyone else have a story?
 
wait a minute, you sound like a huge guy, like a wrestler or something especially the part of a choke hold, and putting him to sleep. This guy starts with you, what was his size compared to you? The way you make yourself sound, you sound huge, why would he step to you?
 
MikeyLikesJuice said:
wait a minute, you sound like a huge guy, like a wrestler or something especially the part of a choke hold, and putting him to sleep. This guy starts with you, what was his size compared to you? The way you make yourself sound, you sound huge, why would he step to you?
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Don't be niave.

I grew up in Great Yarmouth, England. Many clubs.. lots of bouncers.. all the young hoodlums want to take on a bouncer - and maybe get a lucky punch.. since it does wonders for a guy's reputation.. at least with the kind of mindset of Great Yarmouth shit heads. They get a reputation for being hard i.e. beating a bodybuilding bouncer.. end of story. That is why dweeby shits start fights with bouncers.
 
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what a reputation, now the dude was put to sleep, some rep, now thats naive, at least go to a bouncer that you can take and not get your ass beat, especially put to sleep, sounds stupid to me and now everyone is laughing at him
 
MikeyLikesJuice said:
what a reputation, now the dude was put to sleep, some rep, now thats naive, at least go to a bouncer that you can take and not get your ass beat, especially put to sleep, sounds stupid to me and now everyone is laughing at him
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:fro:
 
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how do I know whicjh one I can take, EASY, listen to the guys story, he destroyed this kid, he had to be much bigger. I been in well over 30 fights and never had anyone over power me like that or put someone to sleep with a grip like that, so theres your answer
 
Garywary is totally right. Also I was a lot bigger then the kid size wise but he wasn't a small kid. He was taller and not skinny. Everyone was saying I can't believe that kid took a shot at you. But sometimes I think they figure what do they have to lose. If I beat him(bouncer,etc..) I'm a hero, if I lose so what everyone expected me too. I was a wrestler in highschool but I learned some some choke holds awhile back from some friends who are in to that submission fighting. This post was not to brag at all I was just stating how fucked up bouncing can be at times. How sometimes it is a great job and other times it's a pain in the ass.
 
one more thing john woe, the reason he sucker punched you like you stated earlier cause you where talking to his x girl, he wasn't trying to be a hard ass, he was pissed, and then he got what he deserved
 
I cannot believe how stupid some of the guys that go to bars are. I have worked in clubs for the last 10 years and it seems that most drunken idiots go for the biggest bouncer in the place. STUPID!! It has got to be an ego thing. It is really fucking bad if you have an 18 to enter night, those dumb fucks have one thing in mind and that is to show their little girlfriends how bad they think they are. I love putting those fuckers in a full nelson and driving their heads into the door as I throw them out on their face. I am by no means the biggest bouncer in the place but I look for those young dick wads who want to cause problems and put a stop to it real fast. aauuuugggghhhh!!!!
 
Mikey you might be right but like I said I did not know this girl was his ex. She comes there alot and I never knew she had an ex. I talk to her but just for conversation as I don't find her attractive. Plus if he was pissed why not be a man and confront me. But like you said he got what he deserved.
 
MikeyLikesJuice said:
how do I know whicjh one I can take, EASY, listen to the guys story, he destroyed this kid, he had to be much bigger. I been in well over 30 fights and never had anyone over power me like that or put someone to sleep with a grip like that, so theres your answer
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Mickey, it doesn't matter how big you are, if someone get's this hold on you your going out quick. I am pretty big, but I'd rather do this to someone than kick their ass. You don't mess up your hair, so you can get back to the chick's while everyone else is laughing at the dumbass. They never come back to the club, lol. :p
 
Dude, you were smart in the choke. I love it...after years of martial arts I have found that it is one of the most humane ways to dispatch a squirrley bastartd with extreme predjudice and stay out of jail. iT DOES NOT MATTER HOW BIG YOU ARE, IF A PERSON GETS A BLOOD CHOKE ON YOU RIGHT YOU ARE OUT QUICK, AND AIR CHOKE TAKES A BIT LONGER BUT IS EQUALLY EFFECTIVE.
sorry about the caps..anyhow, you are smart in choking out the dude, it is fun, but if you get real lucky they piss them selves and do the chicken on the floor as they go out. I did some training with "Judo" ene Lebell in L.A. and he choked this guy out and it looked like a dying chicken..hilarious!
 
Anabolic- that is defenitely one of the benefits of the choke hold
Sky-I have choked out a few but never been so lucky that they piss themselves. There is always next time!! I have seen them go crazy like a chicken actually after someone slaps them and shakes them to come to. They don't know were there at and they panic and flip and flop. This is also very amusing!!
 
My personal favorite back when I was a bouncer was the choke slam into the doorframe. Quick decisive and very painful for them. THough it was fun to choke guys out then toss them out the door to their friends so they can get laughed at. Oh well my two cents worth.
 
So these guys go for bouncers for the rep they get? Maybe earn themselves a nickname in the process? Guess the kids new name would be...Naptime? Lol..I like yer style John.
 
You have to be very careful of blood chokes. And it sounds like you were. There is a thin line between choking someone out and choking them into brain damage. I believe it's like 30sec no blood to the brain damage occurs, closely followed by death.
Genarr3
 
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skyzdalmit said:
Dude, you were smart in the choke. I love it...after years of martial arts I have found that it is one of the most humane ways to dispatch a squirrley bastartd with extreme predjudice and stay out of jail. iT DOES NOT MATTER HOW BIG YOU ARE, IF A PERSON GETS A BLOOD CHOKE ON YOU RIGHT YOU ARE OUT QUICK, AND AIR CHOKE TAKES A BIT LONGER BUT IS EQUALLY EFFECTIVE.
sorry about the caps..anyhow, you are smart in choking out the dude, it is fun, but if you get real lucky they piss them selves and do the chicken on the floor as they go out. I did some training with "Judo" ene Lebell in L.A. and he choked this guy out and it looked like a dying chicken..hilarious!
Click to expand...

Can you direct me on the net to where they may show this blood choke hold?
 
www.sherdog.com

go to the videos section and click on the video of rickson gracie. there are a couple of decent clips of him doing a rear naked choke, a.k.a. lion killer choke. most freestyle wrestlers and all submission wrestling/brazilian jiu-jitsu practioners know this choke. it's actually a very simple choke and if slapped on correctly, it will put the dude to sleep in seconds. that stuff about someone dying in thirty seconds is not true. i have been put to sleep by this choke several times in practice because i tried (unsuccessfully) to escape from it when the other guy had my back with the hooks in. IMO, this technique is a MUST if you are fighting someone who is bigger/stronger and you are good enough to take his back.

mjbrack
 
gymtime said:
Nathan? Anything to contribute here? :D
Click to expand...

Sure, but remember: you asked for it.

So this one time, I'm in the park across the street from where I live, trying to see how many cans of soda I can stand having placed in the bag hanging from a string that's attached to my testicles, as I often do. Anyway, this 4'3", 50lb. eldery lady walks up to me and says, "Excuse me. I don't thing your 'giggleberries' can take any more weight. Try hanging them from your 'twig'." Naturally, that kind of negative attitude just pissed me off. I responded with a rabbit punch to her jaw (you can never be sure just how much agility, strength and speed those old ladies are concealing). I rapidly followed with a running drop-kick to her chest (a maneuver I believe uou is now famous for). She didn't get up. After that whole episode, I was having trouble getting pumped up enough to tolerate more cans of soda than ever before so I gave that up for the day and moved on to trying to catch squirrels with my teeth as they ran by. They don't like that but I don't really care. The trick to a successful catch is to not fool yourself but thinking you can get them around the neck area. You've got to aim for the head, but hope for the tail.
Anyway, that's my story of anger and revenge.

On a side note, I really don't think these stories are helping my reputation any.
 
On a side note, I really don't think these stories are helping my reputation any.

Nathan I think this goes without saying.
 
genarr3 said:
You have to be very careful of blood chokes. And it sounds like you were. There is a thin line between choking someone out and choking them into brain damage. I believe it's like 30sec no blood to the brain damage occurs, closely followed by death.
Genarr3
Click to expand...

All of these chokes you guys talk about doing: Blood chokes, air chokes, choke holds. But I like the "choking the chicken" manuever.

After I beat the guy's ass and he's knocked out on the floor, I proceed with pulling down my pants, and choking the chicken, aiming for his face when I spew. After that, usually all the girls in the place want to go out with me cause they have seen the shear size of my equipment.
 
GaryWary - don't try and learn choke holds from the net mate - you need hands-on experience. Go to a vale tudo school or a traditional japanes ju-jtsu school - there's shit loads in London. You'll learn how to do the holds right and how not to fucking brain damage someone by just choking away for too long (it has been done!).

Seriously mate you do need to be shown by an experienced and responsible teacher. Choke holds are fucking awesome in the right hands but I've been some right bastardised versions, usually by some idiot that's seen Hickson's 'Choke'and thought he'll have a go. Use it wisely mate.:angel:
 
Nathan said:


Sure, but remember: you asked for it.

So this one time, I'm in the park across the street from where I live, trying to see how many cans of soda I can stand having placed in the bag hanging from a string that's attached to my testicles, as I often do. Anyway, this 4'3", 50lb. eldery lady walks up to me and says, "Excuse me. I don't thing your 'giggleberries' can take any more weight. Try hanging them from your 'twig'." Naturally, that kind of negative attitude just pissed me off. I responded with a rabbit punch to her jaw (you can never be sure just how much agility, strength and speed those old ladies are concealing). I rapidly followed with a running drop-kick to her chest (a maneuver I believe uou is now famous for). She didn't get up. After that whole episode, I was having trouble getting pumped up enough to tolerate more cans of soda than ever before so I gave that up for the day and moved on to trying to catch squirrels with my teeth as they ran by. They don't like that but I don't really care. The trick to a successful catch is to not fool yourself but thinking you can get them around the neck area. You've got to aim for the head, but hope for the tail.
Anyway, that's my story of anger and revenge.

On a side note, I really don't think these stories are helping my reputation any.
Click to expand...

ROFL LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are too damn funny dude.. I'm crying 'cause I'm laughing so hard
YUM
 
Watch out for those skinny kids that wanna fight bouncers. I had a friend who was a bounce/football player who got into a fight with one of those pussy kids. Damn kid pulls out a knife and stabs him. Went between his ribs and punctured his lung. Guy went through hell after that...u wouldn't believe what they have to do to seal a lung with a hole so u don't choke on your own blood. Anyway he's ok now and just got drafted in the NFL. Just goes to show u how a punk kid has the possibility to take on a guy that could bench almost 500lbs. Careful dudes not everyone plays fair :(
 
gotta love being a bouncer!! i get a lot of shit cause i am only 5'7, so when the drunk guy sees me they seem not to notice that i am also 230. so this tall fucker, like 6'8 is talking shit to me, said he wouldnt leave my club, so i spun him around and chucked him down the cement stairs outside, funny as hell. he got up didnt even turn around and walked off. it is a good place to take out your rage.
 
I bounced for a year once

I got a job as a bouncer as soon as I turned 21 a couple of years ago. It's funny, but nobody ever started shit with me. But then, I am 6'5" 290. It got old after awhile tho because all you do mostly is pick up glasses and carry drunk people out the door.
 
yeah I lost my job as a bouncer because i wouldn't let go of a choke hold (he was in my gaurd and i had him in a giuottien choke others tried to pull him off me but i wouldn't let go until they grabbed his arms (didn't want to get punched)
anyway...best bouncer story...My friend Adam had just thrown a guy out the door ad as he closed it the dude threw a punch at him ...hit Adam near the eye ...in an attempt to get the guuy away, before Adam unleashed with punches of his own...he threw a quick little jab type puch at him.....hit him in the jaws...dudes eyes rolled back up in his head ...he fell over backward...hit his head onthe conctret where it bounces twice....he now goes into convultions...a pool of blood forms under his head...and he shits and pisses his pant!!!!! paramedic are called...and the dudes heart stops! they get him going again and when he arrives at the hospital ..the police are ther to arrest him for assault!....a cop was there saw the whole thing..and had the guy arrested to protect Adam, from a lawsuite
 
that's what happens in this line of work bro. all the little guys want to test you out. to bad for them that they are usually the one's getting hurt.
 
Yeah Gary, and others...blod chokes, air chokes, guillotines, etc..are dangerous and has been stated have a fine line from putting out a fire and starting a serious one. You can really hurt someone, and I agree too that 30 sec. is a long choke, hell I've seen 10 - 13 sec. average if you have your meat hooks set...Do what the guys said and go to a jiu-jutsu, shoot fight, vale tudo, grappling, catchascatchcan, etc..school and you will learn stuff that will compliment the choke because you can get out of them and the guy could come back and whip the jammy back on you and that would suck about a...let's see a 9 on a scale of 1-10.LOL
 
anabolics I understand what you are saying, all I am saying is if the dude has you in a choke hold, and you can't get out, he must be way more powerful. I have had plenty off fights with guys my size and a little heavier that held the throat. All you do is punch the sh** out of them while they have no control over your arms. Unless someone is that much bigger and stronger(like he said he is much bigger and people said he can't believe that kid went after him) then I can see passing out. I have seen many fights and been in them, and never seen someone choke someone and be passed out, that is comical
 
I heard a story a few years back when Chris Cormier still needed to work in Clubs to support his supplements. I heard he actually got wacked by Mike Tyson in one of the clubs in Venice. That must have been f****d up.
 
Mikey- I think your missing the point that most choke holds are done from behind as was the case here. Even though the arms are free it is very hard for someone to strike you anywhere with any force or accuracy. There are ways to get out of choke holds but most people don't know how. Peace!!
 
You guys are gettin a lil too open with this "choking" thing...U can really hurt somebody with that shit...and yea those skinny kids will get f'd up in a fight between a huge bouncer BUT, all I'm gonna say is that u guys better be carefull with who u practice those choke-holds on cuz if u do it to the wrong person when that skinny kid wakes up he might come back with a lil friend. You know...packin heat...strapped...carrying...and then GLONK! GLONK! you are the one who's takin the dirtnap! :destroy: :kapow: I'm just giving u guys some advise...dont think u are invisible cuz u are big...I'm bigger than a lot of dudes who I'd love to fuck up but if u see somebody walkin around with a blue, red, or yellow bandana around their head, ankles, and rists I suggest u go home and practice your choke hold your chicken instead...
 
Sorry to say it but I completely agree with Juan. Bouncer, I wouldn't be embarrassing dudes for the amount of money bouncers make---too many weapons these days.
 
Care for another humourous bouncer story...ok here it goes:

I working one night about 3-4 weeks ago and I saw a girl I was going out with walking with one of my guy friends. My buddy is 6'8'' and he was basically acting as an escort for my girl while i'm working. So what happened was they were walking down the side bar that was in my field of view. All of sudden this skinny white kid ( seems to be stoned or drunk or both ) just walks right into her. That caught my attention and then when she looked at him he started to grind her. Then my buddy grabs him by the neck and I leap off my post to run over. By the time I get there the kid is lying flat on his back on the floor. At this point I just snapped , so I pick him up off the floor by his shirt and I'm pushing him through the crowd to the back door. He then just collapses on the floor again. I just lost it at this point so I just drag his body along the floor since he doesn't want to stay on his feet. As I'm dragging him on the floor everyone is watching me do this and one of the other bouncers tell me to calm down but I'm just trying to control myself from pounding this guy. Another bouncer grabs his legs and I lift him up with his upper body and we both are carrying him out of the club. Here comes the best part , another bouncer is holding the door open and I just yell at the kid " now get the fuck out of here!!!" and I just toss his upper body forward and let go..... now keep in mind the other bouncer was holding his legs......sooooo.... he ends up going head first on the concrete. From guys who witnessed this he actually landed on his shoulder but I wasn't looking because I was so pumped I just left the scene. The bouncer holding he legs ended up kicking him once on the ground. Now what does the kid do after all of this .... he stands up....brushes himself off... and walk away like nothing happend. Meanwhile the other bouncers are laughing there asses off and can't believe what they just saw. Needless to say that the bouncer that held his legs told me , " I wish all of our customers were like this..."
 
I had an incident once where i had to drag this bastard out, I was 5'9" about 210lbs, this dude was same height, about 260lbs, fat bastard. I tossed him out and left it at that, but I guess I must have hurt the poor guys feelings as he came back an hour later with the entire fuckin tribe, about 25 of them, and smashed me in the face with an iron bar when I wasn't looking. Then it was the 7 of us working vs 25 of them, all cuz I made the ass look silly after he started it with me, I should have twisted his head off when I had him in the choke hold. It wasn't worth the hassle for a few extra $ cash every week
 
LOL. I used to love choke holds. Very little marks for the Police when they try and prosecute. Did 7 years myself - far too many good stories.
 
I was a bouncer for two years and this story is exactly why I walked away from it. You're always dealing with the lowest common denominator, they are irrational, drunk, etc etc. Not a lifestyle I want to have anything to do with. I prefer to let the weak minded battle among themselves.
 
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