Fat people aren't the only ones with feelings

[new@gettinbig]

I hear this all the time.." I bet you never had to struggle with your weight" or "you dont know what it is like" or "you are so fit and muscular and dont have to worry about your diet and working so hard to get and keep the weight off" I hear it almost everyday...I think some of it is lack of education and knowledge as far as working out and our lifestlye..and some of it is jealousy and envy of the sacrafices we make and maintain..

 

[doc_pup]

I'm gonna elaborate a lil more on what Saint said, as i know exactly where he is coming from. Considering that i was fat from about the ages of 6-18, i've heard every slam in the book and it wears on you for a long time. Granted, when thin or small framed people get picked on its because of jealousy or someone thinks they look unhealthy. When someone pics on a fat person its either to be cruel just for the fun of being cruel or they think "oh god, how disgusting". Another fact, a small framed person can walk into a club, if they are dressed nice and not too ugly, and have plenty of people to hang out with and dance with. The fat guy/girl walks into the club, they get a million stares and people react like the next epidemic of the bubonic plague just walked through the door. It is certainly unfortunate that anyone is insulted, but from my own personal experience, i feel the stigmas attached to each bodytype are very different in nature. *hops off soapbox*

 

[fawnmarie]

FF,

What they are doing, by mentioning it at all is a mixture of the following:

1. Are actually jealous or envious.
2 Don't know how to compliment you and to avoid awkwardness make it a kind of "insult".

Don't take it as an insult - it really isn't meant to be. It's just that some people are just such complete buffoons they don't know any better. They are not saying it to hurt your feelings, REALLY. Some people can't take a compliment, some can't make 'em either.

And if the plump think they get ragged being fat - try being a smoker! (Well, DON'T, but you get the idea!) 350 lb diabetics in the making walk up to you with their big bags of Burger King and regular cokes and tell you that you're going to die. I can't justify being an addict, but I don't walk up to fat people and tell them they're going to get diabetes and have heart attacks!

Sheesh!

Fawn

 

[mini_mouse]

Heh, yeah, I get these comments too. People make a rude comment and then, because they end it with a little chuckle, think it can pass as a casual joke. Erm, no . Just the other day, when I was talking with some friends about a fancy dress party we were going to, one of them said "So what are you gonna go as? A drainpipe?!" Then all of them laughed. I could have just as easily said to *her* "What are you gonna go as? A donut?!" But, of course, that wouldn't have been funny now, would it?! Nope.

Perfect strangers seem to think they have the right to comment on my size because of this one sided stigma too. A guy in the steet once shouted "put some weight on, love!" but I am sure he would have never dreamed of shouting out his dietary advice to an overweight lady he saw in the street.

But, as someone else has already, I think, mentioned, it often says a lot about the person making the comment. Most people want to be thinner/fitter than they are and so they assume - often wrongly - that those who are thinner/fitter than them are walking around in a bed of roses twentyfour-seven. With this assumption comes the further assumption that these thinner/fitter people are immune to criticism and can therefore, justifiably, be the butt of "harmless" joking.

That said, I can't pretend that the thin people of this world have to contend with prejudice in a way that fat people do. While people may not go up to someone who is overweight and say "oy, fatty!", the prejudice is still made clear to them in other, more insidious ways . It's taboo to actually admit that someone's fat but that's only because the greatest societal taboo of them all is to BE that someone. By contrast, it's seen as acceptable to draw attention to someone's 'thinness' because thinness is considered socially "acceptable." It's prejudice, certainly, and yet virtually all of us subscribe to it

[ramble ramble ...]

- mm