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Your 15 year old is a sexual predator, what do you do?

velvett

Elite Mentor
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Woman wants to 'unadopt' troubled boy

LORTON, Virginia (AP) -- A woman is taking the unusual step of trying to unadopt her 15-year-old son, saying she learned of his troubled past only after he molested two younger children.

"You don't want to throw somebody away," said Helen Briggs, a longtime foster mother. "But sometimes you have to."

Briggs, 57, said she did not know that the boy had lived in five foster homes since he was 16 months old, or that he had been physically abused by his alcohol- and drug-addicted biological parents and was possibly psychotically bipolar.

"I did not know any of that," Briggs said. "They just told me he was hyperactive."

Virginia policy mandates that caseworkers provide "full, factual information" about a child to adoptive parents. State child welfare advocates would not comment on the case because of confidentiality rules.

But records obtained by The Washington Post show some caseworkers do not believe Briggs' claim that she was not fully informed and think she may be trying to get out of having to pay child support.

After the youngster molested a 6-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl in 2003, he was deemed a "sexual predator" by psychologists. That meant that if he remained in Briggs' home, she could no longer be a foster parent to others or allow her three grandchildren in her home, so she chose to try to dissolve the adoption.

A judge granted Briggs's bid to relinquish custody, and the boy is back in foster care. But in Virginia, a child older than 14 must give consent, and the teenager wants Briggs to remain his mother.

Briggs, who with her husband adopted the boy when he was 9, is still required to pay $427 per month in child support.

Briggs said the state's failure to fully disclose the boy's background is tantamount to fraud, and she has asked politicians for help finding a way out of the situation.

"At first blush, you think, `What, you're trying to give up your kid? You're a jerk,"' said state Delegate David B. Albo.

"Then you find this lady has received awards for all the foster work she's done. And that she never would have adopted the boy and put other children in danger if she had had the information that was withheld from her."

http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/10/09/unadoption.ap/index.html
 
Oh My Gosh!

I would also try to unadopt him.
 
fucking kill it. we kill innocent things all day. and good people starve and freeze to death. why should this defect of a human being be allowed to roam? hit the fucking reset button on this garbage.
 
That is horrible. I swear that it is getting to the point that I can barely stand to watch the news with all the depressing shit that goes on in this world. I don't see the woman has any other choice but to unadopt this child since others children are involved. It may totally make the kid worst off though seeing he is being thrown away agian.....what kind of place do we have in society for this person? I don't think these people are ever truly cured of this sickness. Sad...really freaking sad to be so yound and already a sexual predator.
 
Everyone involved is tragically effected.

The child who is the predator. Obviously it was learned behavior. Imagine what was done to him.

The children who were molested. No matter what, that doesn't EVER leave a person.

And the poor woman who has done so much good for children that others threw away. I cant imagine how her heart must ache.
 
HumanTarget said:
fucking kill it. we kill innocent things all day. and good people starve and freeze to death. why should this defect of a human being be allowed to roam? hit the fucking reset button on this garbage.
agreed
 
HumanTarget said:
fucking kill it. we kill innocent things all day. and good people starve and freeze to death. why should this defect of a human being be allowed to roam? hit the fucking reset button on this garbage.

I feel better read that because if he were mine I have to admit I would struggle to overcome the urge to suffocate him in his sleep.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
The child who is the predator. Obviously it was learned behavior. Imagine what was done to him.

The children who were molested. No matter what, that doesn't EVER leave a person.

And the poor woman who has done so much good for children that others threw away. I cant imagine how her heart must ache.
be it a learned behavior.....there's always a moment of choice between right and wrong.

and you're right...being molested never leaves a person but again, moment of choice, you decide how you are going to incorporate it into your life. ride the victim crutch or make something more and better of your life.

as for the foster mom....my heart goes out to her, the other foster children she COULD be tending to...and more so, her grandchildren who can't come around.
 
i seriously need my own country to run. there will actually be men living there, not these metro-sensitive, "omg i got a stain on my expensive clothing" cunts.
 
Damn. If my family were possible targets and it prevented me from seeing my family I would also Un adopt the kid.
That is BS that she and hubby need to pay.Frankly the state fudged up the state should pay!
 
habitualhealth said:
be it a learned behavior.....there's always a moment of choice between right and wrong.

and you're right...being molested never leaves a person but again, moment of choice, you decide how you are going to incorporate it into your life. ride the victim crutch or make something more and better of your life.

as for the foster mom....my heart goes out to her, the other foster children she COULD be tending to...and more so, her grandchildren who can't come around.

I agree with this comment 101 %...well said :-)
We all make choices

I would not be able to harm or un-adopt. I would be torn that's for sure!
 
blueta2 said:
I agree with this comment 101 %...well said :-)
We all make choices

I would not be able to harm or un-adopt. I would be torn that's for sure!
I would definitely be unadopting if I had not been privy to the sexual predator info from the get go. More so, if it kept me from fostering more children which is clearly this ladies passion in life. I don't care what the age is....if someone molests or rapes...they should be punished. It makes my stomach turn and my eyes water at the thought of a 15 year old boy doing anything like that to a 2 yro girl...or a 6 yro boy.

Flip side, what would you do if you were the parent of the 2 yro?? >:/
 
blueta2 said:
I would not be able to harm or un-adopt. I would be torn that's for sure!

You wouldn't be able to unadopt? Are you sure? Based on the excerpt below, I don't think you'd have a choice (regadless of how difficult it may be to carry out):

"After the youngster molested a 6-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl in 2003, he was deemed a "sexual predator" by psychologists. That meant that if he remained in Briggs' home, she could no longer be a foster parent to others or allow her three grandchildren in her home, so she chose to try to dissolve the adoption."
 
habitualhealth said:
I would definitely be unadopting if I had not been privy to the sexual predator info from the get go. More so, if it kept me from fostering more children which is clearly this ladies passion in life. I don't care what the age is....if someone molests or rapes...they should be punished. It makes my stomach turn and my eyes water at the thought of a 15 year old boy doing anything like that to a 2 yro girl...or a 6 yro boy.

Flip side, what would you do if you were the parent of the 2 yro?? >:/

Well I don't have (or want kids) but if anyone hurt my niece or nephew, I would be traumatized for sure!
This is a sad situation for all involved.
Very heart breaking. But yeah this foster mom prob made the best choice.
 
jackangel said:
You wouldn't be able to unadopt? Are you sure? Based on the excerpt below, I don't think you'd have a choice (regadless of how difficult it may be to carry out):

"After the youngster molested a 6-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl in 2003, he was deemed a "sexual predator" by psychologists. That meant that if he remained in Briggs' home, she could no longer be a foster parent to others or allow her three grandchildren in her home, so she chose to try to dissolve the adoption."


Well I guess I would have to live the situation to really know for sure what I would do. It really is so sad though.
But yeah knowing other kids would not have a chance to live in the home, I guess I would think of them first and unadopt
 
Electroshock therapy is still being implemented for those with severe depression and other chronic neurological diseases. There should be a lot more research into this practice when dealing with pedophilic convicts. The idea is to use electric impulses(shock) to stimulate and isolate the synapses that are cause of their adverse actions. One that part of the brain is located it should then be excised from the brain.
 
pdaddy said:
Electroshock therapy is still being implemented for those with severe depression and other chronic neurological diseases. There should be a lot more research into this practice when dealing with pedophilic convicts. The idea is to use electric impulses(shock) to stimulate and isolate the synapses that are cause of their adverse actions. One that part of the brain is located it should then be excised from the brain.
i wouldn't mind using that bad boy on a few parts of peeps brains on EF.
 
habitualhealth said:
I would definitely be unadopting if I had not been privy to the sexual predator info from the get go. More so, if it kept me from fostering more children which is clearly this ladies passion in life. I don't care what the age is....if someone molests or rapes...they should be punished. It makes my stomach turn and my eyes water at the thought of a 15 year old boy doing anything like that to a 2 yro girl...or a 6 yro boy.

Flip side, what would you do if you were the parent of the 2 yro?? >:/

Believe it or not a child that young isnt fully aware of the longterm rammifications of their choices. A lesson that I have had to learn the hard way with my own children.

The only reason that woman would "unadopt" this child THAT EVERYONE ELSE ABUSED AND THREW AWAY is because she realizes that though it may break her heart, the good of one child does not outway the good of all the others. <---- a situation that I as a mother have had to face myself. And it is NEVER easy.

And my family has been affected by molestation. My sister's youngest son was molested by another boy in camp. Her son was 5 and the boy was I believe between 8 and 10.

What did my sister do?

EVERYTHING IN HER POWER TO MAKE SURE THE CHILD THAT MOLESTED HER SON GOT HELP.


But that is just us.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Believe it or not a child that young isnt fully aware of the longterm rammifications of their choices. A lesson that I have had to learn the hard way with my own children.

The only reason that woman would "unadopt" this child THAT EVERYONE ELSE ABUSED AND THREW AWAY is because she realizes that though it may break her heart, the good of one child does not outway the good of all the others. <---- a situation that I as a mother have had to face myself. And it is NEVER easy.

But that is just us.
I agree, a child that young may NOT know in full what the rammifications are...however, they most certainly do know right from wrong.

It seems you've had to deal with just about everything as a mother. I hope YOU are ok. :)
 
habitualhealth said:
I agree, a child that young may NOT know in full what the rammifications are...however, they most certainly do know right from wrong.

It seems you've had to deal with just about everything as a mother. I hope YOU are ok. :)

Thank you for your kind words.

Yes, they do know the difference between right and wrong at a VERY YOUNG age. But what they do NOT realize is the long term rammifications of their actions. That does not come until well into adulthood.

Those of us who grew up in somewhat normal circumstances KNOW that not only is it wrong to hurt another this way but that it would DEVASTATE that other human being. When a child has been stripped of this experience and if it is their genetic predisposition to perhaps lash out you may very well have the makings of a predator or an individual with some other sort of sociopathetic or otherwise anti-social behavior.

The question is, I believe, when has that child crossed the line to adulthood rendering them beyond helping/saving?

When we as women make the conscious decision to either bring a child here or to care for one that is already on the planet it is amazing what obstacles life hands us and how we, as mothers, never seem to bottom out when it comes to digging deep and at least making the attempt to do what is best for most parties concerned.

And we have no choice. We just do what we have to do and in the end, it all works out somehow. We are mothers. It is our lot in life :)
 
Funny thing, I used to win city-wide spelling B's as a kid. Now I have trouble remembering how to spell the simplest words and I could give a rat's ass about spell check.

:)
 
HumanTarget said:
fucking kill it. we kill innocent things all day. and good people starve and freeze to death. why should this defect of a human being be allowed to roam? hit the fucking reset button on this garbage.


The kid is tweaked I dont know what I would do but

Human Target I have read a few posts from you today and have come to the realization that you have some serious anger issues and carefree violent tendencies! I think we are going to read about you in the papers some day. LOL!
 
I don't believe that predatory sexual deviants can be cured....draw your conclusions to what my course of action would be based on that. Bu the way, this is not a half-cocked opinion I pulled out of my ass. Growing up in a town with a large psychiatric hospital where these sick fucks would (and I don't know how this happens) get loosely supervised visits into the community and reoffend, and would stick around the area after being released and reoffend, I've read about enough tragedies in the paper to know hitting the reset button is the best way to take care of it.
 
How the hell did we get to be such an overly compassionate nation? We'll actually go so far as to protect the people that hurt others. Why oh why oh why....we need to put our guts back in.
 
I know people who've adopted kids who've turned out to be real nightmares (ie they lock their bedroom door at night). It's a shame to think that some kids should be "put down", but at times, I don't see another alternative.
 
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