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Why is it that Sex ends with......

covergrl80

New member
Marriage. And Mostly it's the women that does not want it anymore.

Is it that there tired of the man or something else?

This also goes for the Man too
 
Why does marriage end with the baby carriage?

Who thought that kissing would be so dangerous?
 
your signature forced my testicles to go into my stomach
 
covergrl80 said:
See YOU already went wrong.

How can I possibly go wrong with a girl who wears a shirt like that?
 
EnderJE said:
She doesn't want the sex in the marriage anymore? I don't get it. BTW, nice avi.

She wants to know what you don't want, or have the urge to have sex after your married.

Thanks
 
covergrl80 said:
Marriage. And Mostly it's the women that does not want it anymore.

Is it that there tired of the man or something else?

This also goes for the Man too

I think it is a biological thing. A womans premium child bearing years is from like 18-30 maybe 35 and it seems that during this period the woman is always wanting it, but then she no longer wants it as her body ages and becomes unable to bear children efficiently and healthy. So the hormones change to make her not want sex any more.

Whereas a guy is able to produce a healthy child till he drops dead. (at least impregnate any viable female) So, he is always horny looking for the viable female to impregnate and carry on his genes.

I mean really, when you walk into a bar or something as a male the first thing you are drawn to is that tight hot woman vs the woman in her 30's or 40's who may still be hot, but nature draws you to the female that is more viable for producing healthy offspring. Not too mention the low mileage.
 
covergrl80 said:
She wants to know what you don't want, or have the urge to have sex after your married.

Thanks
Okay, I'm stupid. Thanks for the explaination.

It's not that the sex ends with the marriage per see. As you know, it's that priorities change. Try to be intimate when you and him are sleeping about 5 good hours a night, a little stressed at work and taking care of kids. It gets lower on the ladder. The more often that you don't do it, it becomes easier to not do it.
 
chesty said:
I think it is a biological thing. A womans premium child bearing years is from like 18-30 maybe 35 and it seems that during this period the woman is always wanting it, but then she no longer wants it as her body ages and becomes unable to bear children efficiently and healthy. So the hormones change to make her not want sex any more.

Whereas a guy is able to produce a healthy child till he drops dead. (at least impregnate any viable female) So, he is always horny looking for the viable female to impregnate and carry on his genes.

I mean really, when you walk into a bar or something as a male the first thing you are drawn to is that tight hot woman vs the woman in her 30's or 40's who may still be hot, but nature draws you to the female that is more viable for producing healthy offspring. Not too mention the low mileage.

But she is not in her 30's yet and just got married. SHe is only 22 and very attracted to her Husband.
 
It may be that she or feels that now that they have closed the deal that they don't need to any more. However, I can attest to the fact that it will only lead to the marriage breaking up. If they don't have that intimate time, as well as the intimate time during the day, a simple call, or flower, etc. One or both will wander and look for something new. It is the excitement of the chase and the conquest.

My friends wife as soon as their kid was born looked right at him and said I don't do that, I'm a mother and cut him off completely.
 
chesty said:
It may be that she or feels that now that they have closed the deal that they don't need to any more. However, I can attest to the fact that it will only lead to the marriage breaking up. If they don't have that intimate time, as well as the intimate time during the day, a simple call, or flower, etc. One or both will wander and look for something new. It is the excitement of the chase and the conquest.

My friends wife as soon as their kid was born looked right at him and said I don't do that, I'm a mother and cut him off completely.
Agreed. I didn't mean to say that it's cut off. It does slows down or you don't do it as much as you used to (at least in my case). What used to be several times a day, then once a day, then once a week, is now once a few weeks / months.

But, if my wife gave that kind of ultimatium, then I'd prolly be gone.
 
even though i'd fuk anything i get tired of hitting the same poon all the time. i've lost interest except for maybe once a week when i get really backed up.
 
chesty said:
It may be that she or feels that now that they have closed the deal that they don't need to any more. However, I can attest to the fact that it will only lead to the marriage breaking up. If they don't have that intimate time, as well as the intimate time during the day, a simple call, or flower, etc. One or both will wander and look for something new. It is the excitement of the chase and the conquest.

My friends wife as soon as their kid was born looked right at him and said I don't do that, I'm a mother and cut him off completely.
She is not that bad,she just does not have the want.

she says it feels like another part of the "To Do List" that needs to be scratched off at the end of the day. Yes they do have kids aging 8,5 and 3.
Two of the kids are her step kids and the other is her own.
 
timrock said:
even though i'd fuk anything i get tired of hitting the same poon all the time. i've lost interest except for maybe once a week when i get really backed up.

So it's not just women that go through this?
 
He did leave her, it took him a while, but he finally got his pair back and kicked her to the curb!
 
covergrl80 said:
She is not that bad,she just does not have the want.

she says it feels like another part of the "To Do List" that needs to be scratched off at the end of the day. Yes they do have kids aging 8,5 and 3.
Two of the kids are her step kids and the other is her own.
Tell her to not have the sex every day. Go to once a week.
 
Well, they need to put the romance back into their relationship or it will die quickly. It shouldn't be a to do item, it should be spontaneous if possible, but planned is also way cool. They should look forward to it. If they don't fix it it won't be long. I always wanted it until i started hearing shit like hurry up I'm tired, your on my hair, your too heavy, etc. I actually recorded how long it was before she would ask for it and guess what? She never did, after like 3 months I finally just went for it. And got the usual response, "You've got to be kidding me?, I'm tired and I have to get up in the morning. Well, just hurry it so I can get to sleep."
 
chesty said:
Well, they need to put the romance back into their relationship or it will die quickly. It shouldn't be a to do item, it should be spontaneous if possible, but planned is also way cool. They should look forward to it. If they don't fix it it won't be long. I always wanted it until i started hearing shit like hurry up I'm tired, your on my hair, your too heavy, etc. I actually recorded how long it was before she would ask for it and guess what? She never did, after like 3 months I finally just went for it. And got the usual response, "You've got to be kidding me?, I'm tired and I have to get up in the morning. Well, just hurry it so I can get to sleep."
Okay, the way you put it seems like she never wanted it or was negative about it. I'll admit that I usually start it, but we both have fun in the end and wouldn't leave her because of that.
 
chesty said:
Well, they need to put the romance back into their relationship or it will die quickly. It shouldn't be a to do item, it should be spontaneous if possible, but planned is also way cool. They should look forward to it. If they don't fix it it won't be long. I always wanted it until i started hearing shit like hurry up I'm tired, your on my hair, your too heavy, etc. I actually recorded how long it was before she would ask for it and guess what? She never did, after like 3 months I finally just went for it. And got the usual response, "You've got to be kidding me?, I'm tired and I have to get up in the morning. Well, just hurry it so I can get to sleep."

With 3 kids and not having Family in the same state she finds it a little hard to be spontaneous or to plan things.
 
covergrl80 said:
With 3 kids and not having Family in the same state she finds it a little hard to be spontaneous or to plan things.
I agree about being spontaneous. But planning can be done easily. I would argue that the desire is missing.
 
Smurfy said:
I have noticed over the years that when I lose interest in sex with the person Im with, it's because the relationship is not good.
There very happy with eachother. The sex thing seems to get in the way.
 
if the guy is like me and needs it everyday....the woman is gonna have to keep up or I'll look elsewhere to get some. sad but true.
 
NJjuice22 said:
if the guy is like me and needs it everyday....the woman is gonna have to keep up or I'll look elsewhere to get some. sad but true.

There married and have 3 kids to raise. Your young and single that is why you think that way. But There very much in love and want to make it work.
 
NJjuice22 said:
if the guy is like me and needs it everyday....the woman is gonna have to keep up or I'll look elsewhere to get some. sad but true.


i said the same thing when i was single. i have been getting the same ass for 4 years.............................I"M BORED. i really don't look forward to it at all except getting my nut now. and we had sex like rabid monkeys before we were married.
 
covergrl80 said:
Marriage. And Mostly it's the women that does not want it anymore.

Is it that there tired of the man or something else?

This also goes for the Man too

u guys watch too much fucking mtv. quit looking for "perfect" looking guys and find one that is gonna treat u right. god i wish it was the 1800s again. u guys got problems for real.
 
a woman with no sex is like a icecream cone without the icecream.

It's the only thing you've got.
So he will be cheating on her at some point if she's not putting out.
 
covergrl80 said:
There married and have 3 kids to raise. Your young and single that is why you think that way. But There very much in love and want to make it work.



hun...i lived with my ex for 5 years. other than the license i was friggin married. we banged every night.
 
and who cares if she enjoys it or not. She just needs to take one for the team and spread them legs.

laundry, dishes, etc aren't fun either, but they are an essential part of living and family life.
 
markshark said:
u guys watch too much fucking mtv. quit looking for "perfect" looking guys and find one that is gonna treat u right. god i wish it was the 1800s again. u guys got problems for real.

The same thing goes for men,not just women. What the hell is the "u guys" shit. I think you may need to go read the whole thread and then come back with your 2 cents.
 
Covergrl, we all this "friend" you speak of is really you.

Perhaps you need some aap lovin' to spice things back up.

What time is good for you?
 
alien amp pharm said:
Covergrl, we all this "friend" you speak of is really you.

Perhaps you need some aap lovin' to spice things back up.

What time is good for you?

That is not me. I for one am not married Yet, nor do I have 3 kids HUN
 
covergrl80 said:
With 3 kids and not having Family in the same state she finds it a little hard to be spontaneous or to plan things.

Those are excuses. You don't have to have a schedule or a planner. It takes 30 minutes or less of ones life away to be intimate in that manner which is as important or more so than saying I love you. I was in the Marines with a war going on and we found time, then I was in college and we were 90 miles apart for quite sometime and we found time (well I did) It is a matter of priorities, either you want to be intimate or you don't. If you don't you better find out why quick or things will be a living hell before long. She is only 22, at this rate when she is 35 she will for something new and different and it is gonna be a mess. I know from experience.
 
covergrl80 said:
The same thing goes for men,not just women. What the hell is the "u guys" shit. I think you may need to go read the whole thread and then come back with your 2 cents.

i did read the thread. msot guys are content with the love of their life. women are always looking for something better. and when i say "u guys" i mean females in general. thats why im never getting married.
 
maybe she is stressed out in her new life situation. not saying she isnt happy, but taking on that much at age 22 is probably alot especially if she is away from family. if someone at age 22 has no sex drive, it is definitely a red flag. she's probably overwhelmed with life changes. she should see a counselor on ehr own and then, possibly with her husband. she's got nothing to lose at this point.
 
It takes two to party. If something is not right in the relationship, then one will not want it. And it doesn't have to be an obvious wrong. 22 years old with 3 kids, one that is almost half her age, she is barely ready for a marriage let alone a ready made family.

And to say they are in love with each when she is not interested in sex doesn't make much sense?! If they are in love then the most intimate of acts will not be a chore or to do item and will be a spontaneous and meaningful act that actually will reduce stress, and make you feel better about yourself and the problems you may have.

In this case, maybe she does not enjoy sex with him because it does not fulfill her needs/desires or what she thinks sex is supposed to be like. Maybe she is not good at it so he just acts mechanical to get it over with. Whatever the problem is they need to figure it out.
 
chesty said:
It takes two to party. If something is not right in the relationship, then one will not want it. And it doesn't have to be an obvious wrong. 22 years old with 3 kids, one that is almost half her age, she is barely ready for a marriage let alone a ready made family.

And to say they are in love with each when she is not interested in sex doesn't make much sense?! If they are in love then the most intimate of acts will not be a chore or to do item and will be a spontaneous and meaningful act that actually will reduce stress, and make you feel better about yourself and the problems you may have.

In this case, maybe she does not enjoy sex with him because it does not fulfill her needs/desires or what she thinks sex is supposed to be like. Maybe she is not good at it so he just acts mechanical to get it over with. Whatever the problem is they need to figure it out.
I did forget one important part of info. SHe has been on Prozac for about 8 months now. She know that could be some of the problem. But she just can not come off of it over night.
 
Prozac will kill your desire for sex in 0.1 seconds! She def. needs to wein off of that stuff if she can. Why is she on it? She is only 22 and has her whole lilfe ahead of her.
 
markshark said:
i did read the thread. msot guys are content with the love of their life. women are always looking for something better. and when i say "u guys" i mean females in general. thats why im never getting married.
Men also look for something better when they are tired of being with the same person. It goes for both. (read above)

As for you not getting married...... That is your best bet.
 
chesty said:
Prozac will kill your desire for sex in 0.1 seconds! She def. needs to wein off of that stuff if she can. Why is she on it? She is only 22 and has her whole lilfe ahead of her.
She has OCD.Which I might add is not that bad. I never knew she had it until she told me she was on medication for it.
 
True, guys do the exact same thing and in fact have a harder time not doing it. It is in our nature. (ie, marriage, monogamy runs contrary to our nature to survive and sex is the only way to ensure the species survives) A lot of the time one strays because the relationship became stale, your wife/husband is no longer the picture of who you married years before, weight gain, gut from having kids, wrinkles etc. Apparently women like the wrinkles and shit on a man and men can't stand it on women.

And usually it is only one person in the relationship that heads south physically which makes it worse for the one who didn't, especially if the one who didn't is into fitness, etc.
 
chesty said:
True, guys do the exact same thing and in fact have a harder time not doing it. It is in our nature. (ie, marriage, monogamy runs contrary to our nature to survive and sex is the only way to ensure the species survives) A lot of the time one strays because the relationship became stale, your wife/husband is no longer the picture of who you married years before, weight gain, gut from having kids, wrinkles etc. Apparently women like the wrinkles and shit on a man and men can't stand it on women.

And usually it is only one person in the relationship that heads south physically which makes it worse for the one who didn't, especially if the one who didn't is into fitness, etc.

There not cheating on each other and are happy with there relationship (besides the sex). The poor girl just has not sex drive at all. I Think once she gets off the Prozac she will ok.
 
This broad sweeping statement that says men will go look for somethign else when they get tired of it is certainly not the assumption I hope. First if the guy is that lame that he's gonna go bang some ho because he's bored w/ sex, despite his commitment to his wife and his fathering of 3 kids, then he deserves to get a nice big fat venereal disease (AND BETTER NOT BRING THAT SHIT BACK TO THE WIFE & FAMILY...) The fact that she's on Prozac is the first thing I would address. Mood is such a fundamental component of what makes us who we are that if you sidestep that particular issue and go look at any of a thousand other "might happens", then you are just missing the point and will probably end up with exactly what you feared (the guy leaving u, maybe getting "it" somewhere else AND getting custody of the kids) because you didn't identify w/ and deal w/ the issue.

Anyway, if you start w/ the hypothesis that sex ends when you get married and set up all your hopes (or lack thereof) and expectations (or lack thereof) around that, you are doomed. If you look very honestly at the set of conditions that apply to this particular person, then you have a chance of coming up w/ the correct solution. Or at least identifying the issues and coming up w/ some way to deal w/ them, or learn to live w/ them.

There is too much at stake with kids and a life started already that she should assume the guy is going to bail. To jump to wide sweeping general statements and look for validatoin of it out of context is not going to solve anything, and may even cause more undue stress than is necessary.
 
It is not a broad statement unfortunately, but rather a fact. And the women do so as often as the men. Men tend to do it more so in their younger years and the women tend to do it in their middle years. It is just a fact of life and usually there is reason that initiates them into cheating such as perceived unhappiness at home, etc. For me, I no longer wanted it from my ex, in fact the thought of it repulsed me greatly. Later I realized it was because subconciously I knew she was cheating on me but I refused to believe that.
 
Life gets in the way, & we can't be bothered to do the seduction/romance thing.
We need to date our spouses people. C'mon, everybody get out.
Now!






















































What are you still doing here?
Go!
 
I have ocd, but I don't take an anti depressant for it. So I am not sure why she is taking the med.
 
chesty said:
I have ocd, but I don't take an anti depressant for it. So I am not sure why she is taking the med.
That is what her Doc gave her to take. I have heard that it's given to a lot of people that have OCD
 
covergrl80 said:
Marriage. And Mostly it's the women that does not want it anymore.

Is it that there tired of the man or something else?

This also goes for the Man too

That little poem in your signature is the reason I'm single. I'm looking for a cool chick.
 
covergrl80 said:
OMG it is from a song. Shit. I did not make it up on my own!

Good. Now get rid of it before I puke! :)
 
covergrl80 said:
That is what her Doc gave her to take. I have heard that it's given to a lot of people that have OCD

My counselor for marriage had me where a rubber band on my wrist and every time I started to dwell on something I was to snap it hard. That and some will power and now I am not ocd anymore.
 
seek counselling. there are a couple of easy tricks the couple can do to increase desire, and its best to chat to a sex therapist about your situation specifically. common techniques are: not being allowed to have sex for a month, even if you want to (the artificial limitation makes you itch for it), no masturbation allowed, no getting undressed in front of each other, no showering with each other, no leaving the toilet door open to poop (yuk yukyukyuk) making proper time for each other etc etc...that sort of thing.

also, dont feel bad that you ahve no sex drive, you jsut got out of hospital. poor thing :(
 
covergrl80 said:
I did forget one important part of info. SHe has been on Prozac for about 8 months now. She know that could be some of the problem. But she just can not come off of it over night.

Problem solved. Get off the drugs and most likely her sex drive will return.

But here is a question you can ask her: even though she is not interested in sex with her husband, is she still masturbating on her own? If yes, then the drugs are not to blame and there is a problem with the relationship. If no, then it is most likely the drugs.
 
My theory:

Men naturally lose interest in screwing the same woman the same way all the time. Once some of that "newness" is lost, they don't put the same effort into chasing their wife/girlfriend.

Women see the diminished pursuit, and correspondingly lose interest in sex. Also, some women feel that after moving-in/marriage, they've "sealed the deal" so they don't have to "put out" as often anyway.

So there they go... guy has diminished interest and doesn't pursue like he used to. The woman becomes less sexual and doesn't feel compelled to change that either. So those killer daily sex-in-a-strange-place sessions get traded for scheduled sex every 10-14 days.

And everything is nice and stable, until...

That little hottie from the gym pays some extra attention to your guy. All of a sudden, those hormones get all woken-up and he thinks "hey, a female wants me!". Then, over the next two months, she starts asking him for advice in the gym. She asks for "spots"... oh... and then they grab a bit after their workout. Next, she mentions that she and her girlfriends will be running around some next Friday night and wants to know if your guy can "break free". Guess what? He can! And the rest is history...

Now, how do you break the cycle? I'm gonna get flamed here, but the answer is for the woman to BECOME that girl in the gym. Do something different... change your appearance a little... break a routine. Then, use a combination of compliments/attention/sexual behavior to get your guy chasing again. The same biological mechanism that makes guys "tired of the same old pussy" is easily fooled. An outfit (i.e. schoolgirl, prostitute, naughty nurse) often bypasses the system.

Now, if the woman says "Hey now, it's not my job to keep him interested. He has to do his part!!!!", then she'll be correct. That, however, does not change the fact that the little gym bunny is coming... in the gym, or at work, or at your son's baseball practice, or in the church choir... she's coming, so it's just a matter of time. As the woman, you'll be correct -- all the way up to and through the divorce proceedings. Now, if you'd rather be right than married, then just stay the course :)
 
covergrl80 said:
Marriage. And Mostly it's the women that does not want it anymore.

Is it that there tired of the man or something else?

This also goes for the Man too
most of the time things go wrong and the women starts using sex as a wepon,or something the can hold over the mans head.
 
Forge said:
Problem solved. Get off the drugs and most likely her sex drive will return.

But here is a question you can ask her: even though she is not interested in sex with her husband, is she still masturbating on her own? If yes, then the drugs are not to blame and there is a problem with the relationship. If no, then it is most likely the drugs.

I have never asked her if she gets her self off,however I will guess and say no.

I will be sure to pass this info on to her. A lot of things that have been said here make a great point and some of it may help her.Or maybe I can get her to open an account a read it for her self, Which may be better.

biteme said:
Good. Now get rid of it before I puke! :)

I would rather see your pansy ass puke. Just shows me how weak you are. :lmao: :heart:
 
mrplunkey said:
My theory:

Men naturally lose interest in screwing the same woman the same way all the time. Once some of that "newness" is lost, they don't put the same effort into chasing their wife/girlfriend.

Women see the diminished pursuit, and correspondingly lose interest in sex. Also, some women feel that after moving-in/marriage, they've "sealed the deal" so they don't have to "put out" as often anyway.

So there they go... guy has diminished interest and doesn't pursue like he used to. The woman becomes less sexual and doesn't feel compelled to change that either. So those killer daily sex-in-a-strange-place sessions get traded for scheduled sex every 10-14 days.

And everything is nice and stable, until...

That little hottie from the gym pays some extra attention to your guy. All of a sudden, those hormones get all woken-up and he thinks "hey, a female wants me!". Then, over the next two months, she starts asking him for advice in the gym. She asks for "spots"... oh... and then they grab a bit after their workout. Next, she mentions that she and her girlfriends will be running around some next Friday night and wants to know if your guy can "break free". Guess what? He can! And the rest is history...

Now, how do you break the cycle? I'm gonna get flamed here, but the answer is for the woman to BECOME that girl in the gym. Do something different... change your appearance a little... break a routine. Then, use a combination of compliments/attention/sexual behavior to get your guy chasing again. The same biological mechanism that makes guys "tired of the same old pussy" is easily fooled. An outfit (i.e. schoolgirl, prostitute, naughty nurse) often bypasses the system.

Now, if the woman says "Hey now, it's not my job to keep him interested. He has to do his part!!!!", then she'll be correct. That, however, does not change the fact that the little gym bunny is coming... in the gym, or at work, or at your son's baseball practice, or in the church choir... she's coming, so it's just a matter of time. As the woman, you'll be correct -- all the way up to and through the divorce proceedings. Now, if you'd rather be right than married, then just stay the course :)


This is an excellent post and something my ex-wife and I kept in mind throughout our marriage. Keeping the spark alive does take work, and you can't simply brush it off because "it's too hard" or "I shouldn't have to". Too many couples stop chasing after the thrill is gone, when they should be courting harder than ever to keep it alive.
 
mrplunkey said:
My theory:

Men naturally lose interest in screwing the same woman the same way all the time. Once some of that "newness" is lost, they don't put the same effort into chasing their wife/girlfriend.

Women see the diminished pursuit, and correspondingly lose interest in sex. Also, some women feel that after moving-in/marriage, they've "sealed the deal" so they don't have to "put out" as often anyway.

So there they go... guy has diminished interest and doesn't pursue like he used to. The woman becomes less sexual and doesn't feel compelled to change that either. So those killer daily sex-in-a-strange-place sessions get traded for scheduled sex every 10-14 days.

And everything is nice and stable, until...

That little hottie from the gym pays some extra attention to your guy. All of a sudden, those hormones get all woken-up and he thinks "hey, a female wants me!". Then, over the next two months, she starts asking him for advice in the gym. She asks for "spots"... oh... and then they grab a bit after their workout. Next, she mentions that she and her girlfriends will be running around some next Friday night and wants to know if your guy can "break free". Guess what? He can! And the rest is history...

Now, how do you break the cycle? I'm gonna get flamed here, but the answer is for the woman to BECOME that girl in the gym. Do something different... change your appearance a little... break a routine. Then, use a combination of compliments/attention/sexual behavior to get your guy chasing again. The same biological mechanism that makes guys "tired of the same old pussy" is easily fooled. An outfit (i.e. schoolgirl, prostitute, naughty nurse) often bypasses the system.

Now, if the woman says "Hey now, it's not my job to keep him interested. He has to do his part!!!!", then she'll be correct. That, however, does not change the fact that the little gym bunny is coming... in the gym, or at work, or at your son's baseball practice, or in the church choir... she's coming, so it's just a matter of time. As the woman, you'll be correct -- all the way up to and through the divorce proceedings. Now, if you'd rather be right than married, then just stay the course :)
I totally agree with everything you have said here. It's a give and take for both partners. Just as women expect to have a certain amount of romanticism in the relationship, the men expect the women to maintain a level of sexuality. There is nothing wrong with doing whatever it takes to keep your man satisfied.
 
chesty said:
My counselor for marriage had me where a rubber band on my wrist and every time I started to dwell on something I was to snap it hard. That and some will power and now I am not ocd anymore.
That's a nice tip. I've got to remember it. No sarcasm.
 
covergrl80 said:
She wants to know what you don't want, or have the urge to have sex after your married.

Thanks


For the female, marriage is all about complacency. Some of them are selfish women who couldn't care less about sex until they're in heat, some aren't.
 
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