Ok. Here is my take on the subject. Ask a black woman and she is independent. That is good for all women to have independence, but when you view everything in life as a competition then there is a problem.
I don't particularly like dealing with that crap. Yes, I know you can make it on your own. Feed that to someone else. I want to be with you to see if we together can make something special. Whether it be emotionally, physically, financially, etc I want to do it as a team. Sometimes one does it better than the other.
You don't have to prove to me that you can do it.
Now all this competing or showing you can do it becomes rather annoying or comes off as major attitude. "I can do anything I want"...I don't want to deal with it.
Other women know or feel that they are independent and will express that at the right situation or when the time merits it. Me trying to talk to you (as in trying to start some form of a relationship) is not one of those situations and they adjust accordingly.
For some reason most of the black women that I have known don't adjust. I don't think black women acknowledge this because they don't see it as a problem, but sometimes when you want to "holla" at someone it is just that. I'm not trying to compete against you or make you feel like you need me, I just want some companionship.
Again this is my opinion. BTW I'm black and have dated white, black, asian. They all have attitudes, but in the trying to get to know you area I only disliked one group. I married the best woman in the world who happens to be white.