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Who's drunk???

Lololololol I don't like joking about others wife's, never know where that line ends. And yes I am.
 
I fucking blew my wife's mind tonight by navigating to YouPorn on the iPad and sending it to AppleTV. She's like wtf this is all free and we never used this before, put on the squirters!

I love her.
 
I got it good last night... Twice! showed hubby all the new bras, panties and fishnets I bought, then I just put on his favorite sweater with no pants and curled next to him, BOOM
Cool story?

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
I'm ready for sex, but I won see my GF until Friday. So unless the heartbroken receptionist in our front office is on the rebound, I'll be rubbing one out later.
 
I'm lit, however, no interest in sex. Fighting a mild case of the flu, joints all ache. Nap time soon.
 
bigbassturd said:
You're lit at 9 a.m?

Jesus
Click to expand...
10:00 a.m. here.

I'm in pain and have bad reactions to every damned pain pill there is. Rather a glass of wine than a vicodin.

Seriously, why is drinking in the a.m. worse than taking drugs for pain? Our ancestors, young and old, drank beer, wine and mead with every meal. Vicodin, oxys and hydros before 8:00 a.m. are okay, but a glass of zinfandel isn't?
 
musclemom said:
I'm lit, however, no interest in sex. Fighting a mild case of the flu, joints all ache. Nap time soon.
Click to expand...

This may sound degenerate, but I give the best bj whith a sore throat, it already hurts, make it hurt for a reason :whatever: oh and I keep throat numbing spray in my night stand, awesome acquisition

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
musclemom said:
10:00 a.m. here.

I'm in pain and have bad reactions to every damned pain pill there is. Rather a glass of wine than a vicodin.

Seriously, why is drinking in the a.m. worse than taking drugs for pain? Our ancestors, young and old, drank beer, wine and mead with every meal. Vicodin, oxys and hydros before 8:00 a.m. are okay, but a glass of zinfandel isn't?
Click to expand...

Try moscato

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
nangiggles said:
This may sound degenerate, but I give the best bj whith a sore throat, it already hurts, make it hurt for a reason :whatever: oh and I keep throat numbing spray in my night stand, awesome acquisition

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
Click to expand...
Hubs is at work (I begged him to stay home), he's also working tomorrow. He's got the nasal/respiratory/coughing/aching version I've got the straight up dragging ass and joint pain.

Neither of us want nookie.
 
musclemom said:
Hubs is at work (I begged him to stay home), he's also working tomorrow. He's got the nasal/respiratory/coughing/aching version I've got the straight up dragging ass and joint pain.

Neither of us want nookie.
Click to expand...

Chug more wine and feel better :kiss:

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
bigbassturd said:
Hydros are acceptable at any hour
Click to expand...
Codones in any form (hydro, oxy, vicodin) or dose destroy my GI tract for over five days. Wine makes me relax and go to sleep and I don't drive so who cares. You stick with your prescription painkillers and keep telling yourself you're better than me.
 
Lol @ you taking that serious

I don't take any painkillers, prescription or otherwise.

Chill a little, the hydro jokes on EF are just that: jokes.

you're an angry drunk
 
bigbassturd said:
Lol @ you taking that serious

I don't take any painkillers, prescription or otherwise.

Chill a little, the hydro jokes on EF are just that: jokes.

you're an angry drunk
Click to expand...

I just laughed at picturing mm as an angry drunk, then I laughed again at my attempt to picture her since I don't know what she looks like xD

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
nangiggles said:
I just laughed at picturing mm as an angry drunk, then I laughed again at my attempt to picture her since I don't know what she looks like xD

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
Click to expand...
Hubby says I'm not an angry drunk, just one who seems to enjoy confrontation.

As to what I look like ... I'd K message you but I don't have anything on the hard drive and I don't own a cell phone :whatever:
 
musclemom said:
Hubby says I'm not an angry drunk, just one who seems to enjoy confrontation.

As to what I look like ... I'd K message you but I don't have anything on the hard drive and I don't own a cell phone :whatever:
Click to expand...

I have a very strange 80's hair no bra wearing t-shirt and jeans vision of you :confused: you have great teeth though :D

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
 
bigbassturd said:
I'd hit it, but you still have saggy tits
Click to expand...
Kinda hard to have saggy tits when they're A-cups you moron.

And what thinks I'd even give you the fucking time of day?
 
bigbassturd said:
I meant with my fist, dumbass
Click to expand...
Ooooo, virtual threats, I'm sooooo impressed and deathly frightened.

There is no man on this planet I'm afraid of. Once you've had the shit beaten out of you by the sperm donor who fathered you, has repeatedly put your mother in the ER and beats on you before you even hit puberty despite the fact he outweighs you by 200 lbs you've pretty much used up your fear factor.

Basically, men who like to hit women just give me incentive to find interesting herbs that will destroy them ... slowly and painfully. Pretty easy to do when you cook all the food in the house.
 
musclemom said:
Fuck it, here's what I looked like in my heyday, it's the only picture I have of just me available right now. It's about 20 years old, and yes, a Halloween pic. Will provide a more recent picture privately to Nan, has my hubby in it, he's uptight about public posting of pics.



Will you people stop thinking just because I'm wiccan and care about the environment I'm a gray haired, tie dyed, saggy titted hag!
Click to expand...


is that halloween, or your regular attire?




lol, jk...you're very pretty.
 
Lmao have you considered the reason you get fucked with so bad is because you can't tell the difference between when someone is serious and when they aren't?
 
miplank said:
is that halloween, or your regular attire?
Click to expand...
Texting is truly destroying the mind of America, I said it was a Halloween pic.
 
All the wicans around here hang around at candle making shops and 2nd hand book stores down near the beach. They also drive small hatch backs with co-exist bumper stickers.
 
musclemom said:
Fuck it, here's what I looked like in my heyday, it's the only picture I have of just me available right now. It's about 20 years old, and yes, a Halloween pic. Will provide a more recent picture privately to Nan, has my hubby in it, he's uptight about public posting of pics.



Will you people stop thinking just because I'm wiccan and care about the environment I'm a gray haired, tie dyed, saggy titted hag!
Click to expand...


You're blonde? no way!!!
 
nangiggles said:
You're blonde? no way!!!
Click to expand...
Okay, fair warning, most men will find this utterly boring so tune this post out, 'kay?

This is how I (and the world of cosmetology) define blonde: Sit out in the sun for hours on end with wet hair, ideally using a little straight lemon juice to speed up the process. What color is the palest your hair gets naturally? Mine will turn platinum. Brunettes end up with reds or orange. Now that I'm an old bag I use medium ash blonde to cover the grey, does a nice natural looking job. In my younger days I used to buy Dark Ash Blonde. Sounds much classier than what my mother used to call it -- dishwater blonde. A fact of life is that as we age our natural pigmentation begins to fade, which is why women who don't change their dye jobs or makeup palettes after a certain age look foolish.

Really it's about the base tone -- Understand the undertones of your skin and hair is key to understanding what color family to work from when it comes to makeup and hair color. Accepting that you can't use screaming whore scarlet after a certain age is the difference between being a pathetic old woman and a cougar. Understanding that you have yellow undertones in your skin narrows the color families you choose from. Coordinating that shit with your hair color is the difference between having a half assed look and looking put together without a lot of effort.

And yeah, there was a time I wanted to go into either art or hair and makeup which is why I eve know half this shit :whatever:

/end chick rant
 
musclemom said:
Okay, fair warning, most men will find this utterly boring so tune this post out, 'kay?

This is how I (and the world of cosmetology) define blonde: Sit out in the sun for hours on end with wet hair, ideally using a little straight lemon juice to speed up the process. What color is the palest your hair gets naturally? Mine will turn platinum. Brunettes end up with reds or orange. Now that I'm an old bag I use medium ash blonde to cover the grey, does a nice natural looking job. In my younger days I used to buy Dark Ash Blonde. Sounds much classier than what my mother used to call it -- dishwater blonde. A fact of life is that as we age our natural pigmentation begins to fade, which is why women who don't change their dye jobs or makeup palettes after a certain age look foolish.

Really it's about the base tone -- Understand the undertones of your skin and hair is key to understanding what color family to work from when it comes to makeup and hair color. Accepting that you can't use screaming whore scarlet after a certain age is the difference between being a pathetic old woman and a cougar. Understanding that you have yellow undertones in your skin narrows the color families you choose from. Coordinating that shit with your hair color is the difference between having a half assed look and looking put together without a lot of effort.

And yeah, there was a time I wanted to go into either art or hair and makeup which is why I eve know half this shit :whatever:

/end chick rant
Click to expand...

Christ I didn't make halfway through the first sentence.
 
Bunch of cheap, poor motherfucker's too broke to cough up a couple hundred bucks for a pro to color their hair.
 
Fuck all y'all

image.jpg
 
I'm gonna start a whole bunch of stuff in 2014. Quitting is for ....quitters?!?
 
nangiggles said:
I got it good last night... Twice! showed hubby all the new bras, panties and fishnets I bought, then I just put on his favorite sweater with no pants and curled next to him, BOOM
Cool story?

Sent from my HTCEVOV4G using EliteFitness
Click to expand...

Gross, change you avi
 
WoodyO said:
Bunch of cheap, poor motherfucker's too broke to cough up a couple hundred bucks for a pro to color their hair.
Click to expand...
Has nothing at all to do with cost. I react violently to some unknown components of regular hair coloring. I have to get special dyes that are made for chemically sensitive people. Trust me, shit's damn near as expensive as a salon job.

That being said, I've been doing my hair since I was a teen, I'm good at it. Told you, I wanted to go into cosmetology once. Lots of shit you can learn if you know how to find a library, crack a book and/or surf the web.
 
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