"No, you won't get hemorroids, I promise"
"But they said saber-toothed crotch crickets went extinct, I swear"
"Guess I shoulda wiped off before puttin it back in there"
"OMG, what's he drive again?!?!"
"Fine, but this is the last passing grade for this semester. High school will be a lot different, you know"
And the oldy but goody "Oh that reminds me. Your brother has the car tonight" (ya'll know the rest, yes?)