Think I might want a divorce

[nefertiti]

I think approaches to relationships are influenced by how your parents got along, but a lot of it depends on where you are mentally and how you view society and the world. My parents hated each other most of the time growing up. I can remember some happy times before I was 10 years old, but most of it after that, and especially all of it age 14 and up, was terrible. My mom played every mind game with my dad, and my dad knew it but put up with it. I know they stayed together for me, because as soon as I graduated high school, they got divorced.

The way my parents' bad example impacted me was how easily I trusted people. For a long time, I had a very difficult time trusting women. Now, I'm fortunate to be very good friends with a married couple who are extremely happy with their marriage. It's amazing to see how they are with each other, and it really does represent a lot of what I feel a marriage should be. Being able to see that has changed my opinion of society, women, and relationships. I'm also fortunate enough to have a girl in my life that I share a lot of that same connection with. I'm not saying she's the one I'll marry, but it feels good to know that relationships can be a beautiful thing.

I don't think anyone who comes from a dysfunctional parental marriage is doomed to be dysfunctional by any means. I just don't think it does a child any favors to be around both parents when both parents are miserable.

 

[uamaverick]

No, it doesn't help by any means. I didn't treat my first real girlfriend in high school very well, and it's because of how my parents were. I was able to escape that. I never turned to alcohol or sex/hookups to deal with my negative viewpoints on relationships. I was able to be transparent and objective enough with myself to understand the issues I had with my own temperament, and was able to change. A lot of other men never really grasp that, and end up in bad relationships because of their outlook on things and how they respond to adversity.

 

[bakemeacookie]

never married.

happy.

the end.

c

 

[-SD-]

never married.

Happy.

The end.

C

titcr

 

[ceo]

You're not stupid. You're just expecting your marriage to always be strong. It's not always going to be strong. When it's weak, women will be there to find chinks in your man's armour.

OMG!!!!

So fucking RACIST!!!!!!

 

[-SD-]

OMG!!!!

So fucking RACIST!!!!!!

hopefully there arent any slopes in the armor either lololo

 

[needtogetarmy]

this will sound druggy like lol

but have you ever done mdma with her?

It has been used with great success in couple therapy

lol If I knew where to get some I would try it.

She won't even take aspirin when she has a headache.

 

[cindylou]

OMG!!!!

So fucking RACIST!!!!!!

lol

 

[lander2312]

Just read every page of this post and noticed 2 things.

1) did the guy who started the tread ever come back and take time to explain "his story"? I mean most here are trying to hepl and he cant even come back and add the rest of the story.

2) How many people were affected by their divorce like I was. Woot man I feel ya. I have been divorced for 6 years now and I can tell you that even when you do everything you could to work it out...and even after you get to the part to where you know that your in a much better situation now...none if it matters because every time I have to let my daughter go back to her mothers i have to watch her leave. I have to sit in a house and not hear her footsteps running in the house...I dont hear the laughter that makes me smile to just hear. There is no way that anyone can comprehend the pain and suffering that everyone in a family goes thru when a divorce occurs. 6 year.....6years and that wound reopens when she leaves me. I have joint custody of my daughter but not being able to tuck her in bed everynight suck....not being there for her to run to me when she has the bad dream...man the list could go on and on....divorce sucks. I dont miss her mom at all...but i miss my daughter every minute that she is away.

 

[cindylou]

Just read every page of this post and noticed 2 things.

1) did the guy who started the tread ever come back and take time to explain "his story"? I mean most here are trying to hepl and he cant even come back and add the rest of the story.

2) How many people were affected by their divorce like I was. Woot man I feel ya. I have been divorced for 6 years now and I can tell you that even when you do everything you could to work it out...and even after you get to the part to where you know that your in a much better situation now...none if it matters because every time I have to let my daughter go back to her mothers i have to watch her leave. I have to sit in a house and not hear her footsteps running in the house...I dont hear the laughter that makes me smile to just hear. There is no way that anyone can comprehend the pain and suffering that everyone in a family goes thru when a divorce occurs. 6 year.....6years and that wound reopens when she leaves me. I have joint custody of my daughter but not being able to tuck her in bed everynight suck....not being there for her to run to me when she has the bad dream...man the list could go on and on....divorce sucks. I dont miss her mom at all...but i miss my daughter every minute that she is away.

I couldn't imagine not having my daughter all the time. I couldn't imagine not having her on every Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Just thinking about it hurts and makes me anxious.