This thread is in response to the overwhelmingly slanderous and unusual emotional disruption caused by my rejection of homosexuality as a healthy lifestyle based on a good value system.
First off, allow me to clarify the meaning of the word "derisory" for my little friend who is too lazy to use a dictionary. It means pathetic, pitiful, laughable, contemptible... If you need aditional synonyms, please look them up yourself.
As for the choice factor involved with homosexuality: some feel they were gay at birth, some admit conscious decision later. I personally believe that outside influences affect one's decision to be straight or gay. Some people feel devoid of individuality. They believe that everything they are is because of what happened to them. Two things are ignored in this regard: first, that they were born with certain characteristics of temperament and behavior to which others respond uniquely, and second, that incidents are not as important as their take, or perception, of the meaning behind the incident. That latter experience is also unique to each individual.
It is necessary to create an immense divide between behaviors and feelings. Once we have recognized that the fallacious, faltering emotions and feelings we have are reflexive and irrational, it becomes important to decide concretely that one’s behaviors will not be dictated by those feelings. It’s when you blend feelings with a major dose of courage, conscience, and rational thought that you connect to the most self-respectful aspects of your humanity. As a compass guides you through a dense forest, values direct you through challenges in life. Using values to determine your next move is ingeniously pragmatic and utilitarian. When we abdicate our values to whim, urge, immediate gratification, or voluntarily subjugate ourselves to someone else’s whim or gratification - this most certainly will lead to destructive behavior.
We must learn to tolerate the discomfort of emotional and physical pain until we find a way to deal with it that rightly serves us. Otherwise we focus only on emotional hurt, not emotional health. And our exaggerated elevation in importance of emotional hurt provides us with a thousand or more excuses to take the ethical detour right into demeaning, counterproductive, desperation-based dilemmas, and to stay there. This is true of everyone.
We tend to see the world and others only through our own needs. Exaggerating criticism to avoid taking responsibility is a self-defense technique. Anger can be used as one of those protective devices – a kind of armor. It is often invoked instead of being open, courageous, and honest with others and situations. It is interesting to note that finding blame does not find solutions – the natural endpoint for that path is false self-gratification.
Values are principles and ideas that bring meaning to the seemingly mundane experiences of life. A meaningful life that ultimately brings happiness and self-respect requires you to respond to temptations as well as challenges with honor, dignity, and courage. Actually, values can make difficult choices or dilemmas appear more clear-cut because they focus on concepts of ethics, virtue, and morality – qualities more resilient against circumstance than emotions tend to be. This is the fundamental exchange: immediate gratification versus ideals that transcend comfort, but build character.
Granted, the support and sympathy you get from calling yourself a "gene victim" temporarily distracts you from the inevitable pain of acknowledging your own weaknesses and inappropriate choices-all of which do constitute personal responsibility. But, you still must face the fact that something more than circumstance determined your dilemma; you know you made a choice. It is only in humbling yourself to that truth that you become free from the internal misery of guilt and regret and become empowered to be and do better.
Clearly, an imaginary value system which blindly accepts abberant lifestyles is unhealthy and socially damaging. I do not believe that any homosexual who is intellectually honest with him/herself can totally eliminate the internal guilt and shame that must result from their actions. I do not believe we were created for the purpose of satisfying every sexual urge, this is what separates us from the animal kingdom.
I have attempted to use a more generalized flow of thought here as opposed to directly assualting a single person. We all have whims and urges, some act on it, some choose to think it through
First off, allow me to clarify the meaning of the word "derisory" for my little friend who is too lazy to use a dictionary. It means pathetic, pitiful, laughable, contemptible... If you need aditional synonyms, please look them up yourself.
As for the choice factor involved with homosexuality: some feel they were gay at birth, some admit conscious decision later. I personally believe that outside influences affect one's decision to be straight or gay. Some people feel devoid of individuality. They believe that everything they are is because of what happened to them. Two things are ignored in this regard: first, that they were born with certain characteristics of temperament and behavior to which others respond uniquely, and second, that incidents are not as important as their take, or perception, of the meaning behind the incident. That latter experience is also unique to each individual.
It is necessary to create an immense divide between behaviors and feelings. Once we have recognized that the fallacious, faltering emotions and feelings we have are reflexive and irrational, it becomes important to decide concretely that one’s behaviors will not be dictated by those feelings. It’s when you blend feelings with a major dose of courage, conscience, and rational thought that you connect to the most self-respectful aspects of your humanity. As a compass guides you through a dense forest, values direct you through challenges in life. Using values to determine your next move is ingeniously pragmatic and utilitarian. When we abdicate our values to whim, urge, immediate gratification, or voluntarily subjugate ourselves to someone else’s whim or gratification - this most certainly will lead to destructive behavior.
We must learn to tolerate the discomfort of emotional and physical pain until we find a way to deal with it that rightly serves us. Otherwise we focus only on emotional hurt, not emotional health. And our exaggerated elevation in importance of emotional hurt provides us with a thousand or more excuses to take the ethical detour right into demeaning, counterproductive, desperation-based dilemmas, and to stay there. This is true of everyone.
We tend to see the world and others only through our own needs. Exaggerating criticism to avoid taking responsibility is a self-defense technique. Anger can be used as one of those protective devices – a kind of armor. It is often invoked instead of being open, courageous, and honest with others and situations. It is interesting to note that finding blame does not find solutions – the natural endpoint for that path is false self-gratification.
Values are principles and ideas that bring meaning to the seemingly mundane experiences of life. A meaningful life that ultimately brings happiness and self-respect requires you to respond to temptations as well as challenges with honor, dignity, and courage. Actually, values can make difficult choices or dilemmas appear more clear-cut because they focus on concepts of ethics, virtue, and morality – qualities more resilient against circumstance than emotions tend to be. This is the fundamental exchange: immediate gratification versus ideals that transcend comfort, but build character.
Granted, the support and sympathy you get from calling yourself a "gene victim" temporarily distracts you from the inevitable pain of acknowledging your own weaknesses and inappropriate choices-all of which do constitute personal responsibility. But, you still must face the fact that something more than circumstance determined your dilemma; you know you made a choice. It is only in humbling yourself to that truth that you become free from the internal misery of guilt and regret and become empowered to be and do better.
Clearly, an imaginary value system which blindly accepts abberant lifestyles is unhealthy and socially damaging. I do not believe that any homosexual who is intellectually honest with him/herself can totally eliminate the internal guilt and shame that must result from their actions. I do not believe we were created for the purpose of satisfying every sexual urge, this is what separates us from the animal kingdom.
I have attempted to use a more generalized flow of thought here as opposed to directly assualting a single person. We all have whims and urges, some act on it, some choose to think it through